Very Depressed

6 Replies
worried - November 18

My husband and I have been married for 3 1/2 years. We have a 2 year old DS. He's always known that I wanted a 2nd baby, but he only wanted 1. Well, recently I turned up pregnant again, but he thinks I tricked him. I really did not. This pregnancy has caused me to have to quit school and post pone my degree for a whole year. NOT WHAT I WANTED!! but I cant convince him of it. We have been arguing about it and I cant take it anymore. He knows I wasnt on BC. He always uses the withdrawl method and I guess it failed him this time. I just dont want the baby to be treated bad. What do I do?


to worried - November 18

shoot ! noone replied here ? well .... after 21 weeks of tears , confusion , possible menopause , ultrasound , and many visits to the doctor , we finally discovered that we are having our third child ...... nervous and a little uncomfortable I have been but I am very happy and although it took far too long for the doctor to discover she was wrong I can now absorb the results which we found today anyway it would be interesting or at least helpful to hear why he only wanted/wants one child?


hum - November 18

You should sit down and make him understand that it took the both of you to make a baby. Obviously, you werent on bc, and he was relying on a method that wasnt exactly fool proof. How exactly does he think you managed to trick him? It's not like you were on the pills and stopped, or he was using condoms and you put holes into them. I think he's being unreasonable and to take it out on you and your unborn is extremely selfish.


Lisa - November 18

I think "hum" summed it up perfectly.


SHelly - November 19

well arguing is not going to make him understand, i think you two should sit and talk this over. like "hum" said you both were not using any form of protection so that should absorb some way into the thick head he seems to have right now. sorry im not trying to be rude, but maybe he is also upset because you do have to quit school and put things off, maybe thats the first thing he thought of. I also think as time pa__ses he will ease up a little and i believe he will love your new baby as he does your 2 yr old. ITs just a shock for now. i hope some time to let this settle will change his mind. you know him best, i dont know him at all. Hope it works!


Lacy - November 19

I completely agree with "hum" also. I think you should ask him how he thinks you tricked him. Maybe just the shock of finding out caused him to act irrationally and say that. It's probably not that he's mad at you, just as nervous as you are, because you both feel that the timing is off. Good Luck!


no name - November 19

It's just shock. You're married and already responsible parents. He will have to get used to this. If you were dating or something I could see his suspicions. But not in this situation. Give him time to come around. It's early to a__sume a lot of things. Love grows...



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