Why Despite So Much Pain

29 Replies
A - December 28

I'm not pregnant. But thinking about all the pain of labor, I 'm pretty sure I'll never have kids. I don't know why women willingly have babies. I read things about "it felt like my legs were peing ripped apart" and "no amount of pain killer could take away the burning." Why would anyone put themselves through that? Is it becasue you don't know going into and so you're stuck? And I know its a great feeling to have these little babies, but how can it really be worth excrutiating pain. Even with epidurals, I'm reading "you'll be in so much pain the epidural will feel good." I don't want to be in so much pain a huge needle going into my spine feels good. And I know I'm not the only woman who feels like this.


KLC - December 28

Well, the why part of your question was accurate anyway...Why would you ask such a moronic question on a forum full of ladies who will all be experiencing this in a few months? Seriously, is there a point to your question? I personally don't feel stuck as you so eloquently put it..I feel blessed that God chose me to be the mother of the baby I am lucky enough to have growing inside of me...But hey thanks for freaking a bunch of women out with your useless question and inaccurate descriptions of labor which you know nothing about. Nice one.


kellie - December 28

I have not gone through labor yet but the pain really doesn't scare me. I am sure labor is very painful, but it can't be that bad or people wouldn't choose to have multiple children. Plus, there are a lot of people who seriously exaggerate the amount of pain they are in for dramatic effect. The way I look at it is: Labor is just 1 day of your life, I can handle just about anything for one day. Plus, I want to be a mother so bad that if you told me I would be in labor for a week I would still do it. You sound like you might be very young..........I think you might change your mind when you get older.


A - December 28

Inaccurate? Have you read any of the posts in the labor forums? I quoted directly from that. So they're not inaccurate, unless women who have given birth aren't reliable sources. And it's not a moronic question. Is it worth all the pain? It's obviously a question for women who have had their baby already. So looks like you're the dumb one responding to a question YOU don't know anything about. And freaking you out? If you're on this forum, you're reading the same things I am and I'm a__suming you've read a expecting book or two and have some sort of inkling that pushing a 5-9 lb baby through the birth ca___l isn't pleasureable. I'm not exposing anything new.


KLC - December 28

I am the dumb one responding to a question I know nothing about? I have had three children and am pregnant with our fourth so I think that would make me pretty knowledgeable on the subject. And your not freaking me out if you were able to read and retain what I said in my post was freaking a bunch of women out, meaning those who haven't been there yet. Pleasureable? No it certainly isn't that but one look at that baby and the pain is forgotten. Besides if you had any brains at all you would realize that half of the things people say about labor isn't necessarily true...like Kellie said dramatic effect.


M.A. - December 28

I'm in my third pregnancy. My first was so painful that I couldn't see clearly. But that's all I remember of it. The rest of my memories are only good. They took my baby away a couple of moments later, but I still knew what she looked like, and who she was in the nursery.I don't even remember what I said or did. My mom has told me. My second labor was painful, but not as much. I had normal contractions, which were like bad period cramps. But to tell you the honest truth, I thanked God, and was happy to be going through it the whole time. I would've gone through it for days if needed. I look forward to this labor. I can't wait to go through whatever I must to give my new baby new life, and to see him for the first time. Even if it kills me, I just want to see him, and hold him. Knowing that he is our gift of God.


Steph - December 28

I suppose I don't really understand why you are on a pregnancy forum if you don't want to have children due to the pain. Obvioulsy it's not that freaking bad or women would not get pregnant like they do. I'm pregnant with my second child and sure, I'm not looking forward to labor, but on the same hand I'm not scared of it. Also, it's not excrutiating pain for everyone. My labor with my daughter, getting to the hosptial and getting the epidural was 2.5 hours. This time around I am not going to get any pain medication. The pain of labor is well worth a child any day! Also, you seem to be reading only the truly horrible labors that women have written about as opposed to those who had little pain and quick labors. There's pretty much a happy median with regard to the same, and not every labor and delivery is torturous pain. Oh, I'm going natural this time around, so I'm not quite sure what you'll think of that.


Kendra - December 28

Why do people get tattoos, or piercings, or walk on coals, or swallow swords, or a billion other rituals that involve pain. It's important and worth it to them. Of course it's worth all the pain. Are you not slightly grateful someone gave birth to you? Those other things may just be rituals, but child birth is life. Until they perfect the artificial womb - that's how this whole "earth" cycle works. It's your choice to not have kids, - but you have to respect the choice of those that do.


April - December 28

..........why do you think there are people that have like five kids?!?!


ashley - December 28

you sound like a brainless moron.i will have you know i gave birth to 5 beautiful babies going on #6.i thought child birth was a beautiful thing.it's the way of life.everybit of pain a woman goes through is well worth the reward of bringing a baby into the world.get a clue ,with my first one and my fourth one i did not get a spinal or a epidural ya the pain was ten times worse but i knew it was for a d__n good cause and when it's over with you have a wonderful child who loves you no matter what and you love that child more than life.but in your case i would feel so sorry for any kid who was cursed by having you as a mother.


Been There - December 28

A, you really need to get off this site asking something so stupid. What the heck is wrong with you. And, as someone who has experience labor twice so far, yes it does hurt to be in labor, but none of that really matters once that baby is in your arms. First of all, you are questioning something that is very natural. Secondly, it's a good thing your mother didn't feel that way about you or you wouldn't be here. But if you're going to make ridiculous comments to a group of women who are either trying very hard to get pregnant or are and thrilled to be, you need to just move on, stay off our site and enjoy your meaningless life. Yes, I say meaningless because you need to find something better to do than come here, say idiotic things and get on our nerves. Go find the site that suits you. You've never been in our shoes, don't want to be, so get off OUR site and get a life!!!!


dj - December 28

To A, there are some women who do have pretty painful birth experiences but that is usually to their expectation of pain and also due to the baby's size, their size and the post_tion of the baby's head. If the baby is facing up the hardest part of the skull can cause more pressure on the tailbone so those women may have more pain. Most doctors and nurses will do everything in their power to make labor as tolerable as they can without harming you or the baby. The alternative is a cesarean section which from experience is not my preferred choice. The other posters are right, as women we can do anything for our children and birth is one of the least difficult things we do in the long run! I am so gratefule for the opportunity to have experienced pregnancy and labor and (unfortunately) c-sections as I have these wonderful, unique human beings in my life. Birth is not only survivable, but has the most beautiful memories attached to it.


hey A - December 28

I am with you on this one, but I am a mother. before getting pregnant being pregnant was the last thing I saw for myself. After seeing the miracle of life in s_x ed way back when, I was sure having babies wasn't for me. But I got married and pregnancy though unplanned was the in the cards for me. Even though I dreaded the thought of giving birth I figured it was as good a time as any and went through with it. Yes, it was every bit as unpleasant as I thought it would be. I do have to admit that the Stadol almost made it bearable, didn't take away the pain but I was able to sleep at least. As you can see some people have really easy labors and can't imagine what your on about, others of us had really long, tiring, painful labors. In fact for me even being pregnant SUCKED! Despite all of that, I am on baby number 2. Pregnancy STILL sucks, labor I hope will be quicker this time if not less painful and recovery I hope will be a short time. I said I never wanted to be pregnant and then I NEVER want to be pregnant again. I am going to make sure that it doesnt happen again, one of us is getting nipped or tied!


Confused - December 28

Actually A, KLC is quoting from other posts in the forum. I've read those posts, so I know what she's referring to. It sounds like a "fear of labor/delivery" concern, only reworded. Anyway, A...I'm pregnant for the sixth time (I have four grown, or nearly grown, children from my first marriage, having miscarried during one of my pregnancies many years ago). Yes, I'm scared of being in labor and delivery again...especially since I'm much older this time (47). Hopefully, when the time comes, I'll just do what I have to do to get through the day. However, the epidural...I've heard that the needle is much worse-looking than the injection pain. I had CVS testing earlier in this pregnancy, and my husband thought the needle they had to inject into my stomach was huge (about 12 inches) and scary looking, but in reality, it wasn't bad at all. After the procedure was done, I told the doctor I've had gas pains that were much worse!! Also, when I was having children years ago, pain medication was unheard of (unless, as was the case with my first pregnancy, unforeseen circ_mstances mandated their usage, as happened when my first child had to be taken by forceps). The medical community has eased up considerably since I've had my other children, and I plan to take full advantage of it (should I need it, which I expect I will). What it comes down to is if it wasn't for having the baby afterward, chances are a woman wouldn't go through with it, especially more than once. And, it's different for every woman, and for every pregnancy. I've heard some women say they'd rather have a child than a bad cold!!!


Been There - December 28

To Hey A, I guess I don't understand your support of A. If you truly thought it was so horrible and didn't want to go through it again, that's fine. But I find it hard to believe you didn't do something permanent about it if that's how you felt. I know it's painful and irritating at times, we all do. I believe most of us are not upset that A brings up the pain. What upsets us is this woman, who obviously does not want to have children is on a site where women are either trying to get pregnant or are pregnant stating that she doesn't know why women willingly have babies. Or even to ask why anyone would put themselves through that. Isn't the answer obvious? Now, she may be ent_tled to her opinion, but this is not the place for it. Take that on a site where the women are not pregnant or trying to get pregnant. It's HER choice to not have children, but who is she to judge just because some people have had bad experiences? They may have, but are they willing to give back those precious babies they were fortunate enough to gain in the end? Why is A on this site making stupid comments about not wanting children on a site where most of us do. It is called PREGNANCY-INFO, not PREGNANY-DOWN WITH IT!


Been There - December 28

Oops! I meant PREGNANCY. I was a little upset when I was typing. I should have proofread.


smh - December 28

A stated in another post todat that she had a daughter... spilt personalities???



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