Baby In Bed With Me

87 Replies
d - October 24

Kimberly I agree with you totally that its very dangerous to sleep with an infant. When I was sleeping I came very close to that and my husband who wasn't sleeping with me to give me more room in the bed would come and see us and many times I was too close. When your sleeping you never know what your doing. So you need someone to take care of mom for her to regain strenght in order for mom to take care of her infant.


Barb - October 24

i do the exact same thing Heidi...i did it with all my kids...and it's just fine :) if i didn't put her in my bed, i wouldn't get any sleep bc she always wakes up after i lay her in her bed, always! I do keep trying to put her in there, so she's farmiliar with her bed...but she ends up in ours :)


d - October 24

Heidi don't get me wrong, I am not dismissing the idea entirely. In the beginning I understand that its easier for you, but you have to be very careful for safety issues. But I believe that it should be short term because of what your husband is saying. I'm not speaking only from an ECE viewpoint but I've seen it with other couples. Older infants and children do get very attached and will want to sleep with you. It will be a hard habit to break later on. They can test your limits and control you by how much you give in.


rachael mommy2lucas - October 24

Testing limits is what kids do. But it is a personal choice as to how much of what we give in to as parents and what is right for each family. I do not believe that co sleeping is a bad thing, or dangerous in most cases. I am sure that there have been sad cases over the years where something did happen to babies while sleeping in parents beds, but there are many more times where it is a very positive experience. I never intended for my now 2 month old to sleep with me, but he is a fussy, colicky, baby with reflux that does not like to sleep-ever. However, he will sleep all night with the exception of a feeding or two while with me. After 5 sleepless and exhausting weeks, I gave in and now we sleep together. And I will admit I love having that beautiful little boy to cuddle with each night. He is just a baby that needs to be with me, and eventually I will get him in his own bed, but however long it takes, it is mine to deal with. I am a light sleeper and know where he is at at all times and my husband never comes near him in our king sized bed. The two dogs sleep there as well LOL. Mothers know where their babies are at all times in most cases, awake or asleep. The bond and security the baby has is the most important thing and if it works for some, I think its a great idea. A great idea and a personal choice either way.


Heidi - October 24

My daughter sleeps well in her pack n play during the day and doesn't fuss at all but for some reason when it's bedtime for me, she stays awake more and wakes up off and on and cries if she's in the ba__sinet when she wakes up so in the bed she goes! I keep her on my side with a pillow wedged between the bed and ba__sinet and I put her back towards it and prop her with a blanket so she can't roll onto her belly. I don't cover her with tons of blankets, just her own and only up to her chest. I sleep on my tummy facing her and sometimes I've woke up with her forehead in my nose! She somehow wiggles her way closer to me or coos till I get closer to her. I swear if she wakes up I just have to breath heavily or breath on her head and she goes right back to sleep. Weird! But I'm super careful. I'm hoping once she sleeps more in the night I can move her back into her ba__sinet but now she's up ever 3 hours like clockwork to be b___stfed.


Rachael mommy2lucas - October 24

Heidi,that is what I hope too with Lucas. I just think he is too young and needs to be with me right now. He is a high maintenance baby and needs to be held a lot. He is so sweet and as long as he has one hand on me, he sleeps so good. They will get there and sleep by themselves eventually. They are only this little once. It is so cute about the nose to nose thing!


amber - October 24

My daughter is 3 months and has slept with us since her second day home, it was hard to be without her we sleep all through the night this way its natural and mothers have been doingf since the begining of time.As for Sarahs ? about SIDS...they are at risk their first year yet the risk dramaticly declines at 5 months each month getting less and less.


Bohnwin - October 28

Me again... Well, truth is that about SIDS, no one really knows what causes it. One decade they reccommend your kid sleep on their back, then their stomach, now back to kid sleeping on their back. Personally, when Vanessa was just born, I was afraid about her sleeping in bed w/ me and my hubby, so she slept on my left side, w/ me curled around her, and my hubby on my right side. (Poor guy got no loving for at least the first 3 months.) I was afraid my d/h would roll over on her. That's why I kept her on the opposite side of me from him. I believe in the motherly instinct, and that I would never hurt her willingly or unwillingly. (I would have never believed had I not experienced it. I routinely woke up in the same position I fell asleep in.) I maintain that it is normal for an infant to want to feel and smell and hear his/her mother for at least the first 3 months of life. They feel the most comfortable and safe when their mother's warmth and heartbeat are near because this is what they grew to know the entire extent of their short lives. Make sure, new moms, that you are in the right mind-set when you go to sleep with your infants. No drinking, smoking, drugs, (i.e. sober...) etc... these may inhibit the motherly instinct and cause problems.


Jamie - October 28

I believe in mom's instinct, too. I didn't want to cosleep at first, cause I thought that was just plain wierd. Then I had my baby, and realized, it's a heck of a lot easier if you can just latch kiddo and go back to sleep. She started sleeping through the night around 6 weeks, so I started putting her in her ba__sinet. She's now 11 weeks old...some nights she wakes up during the night, others she sleeps right on through; on the nights she wakes up, I bring her to bed with me cause I'm lazy. 8^) But, since there are nights that she'll sleep through in her ba__sinet, I don't think it'll be a problem transitioning her to her own bed when she's on solid foods and not having that occasional 5 a.m. snack. Also, it's just the cutest thing - my husband has gotten some great pictures, cause me and kiddo sleep in the exact same position - arms stretched straight up over our'cept, last night, she apparently rolled over in her sleep...twice. I'm pretty careful about putting her on her back; I'll let her sleep on her side if she's right up next to me, nursing, but I slant her so that when she's done, she rolls to her back. This morning, I woke up, and she was flat on her tummy, arms stretched straight up over her head; so, I flipped her to her back. Woke up a little while later, and she was on her tummy again.


Dawn - October 28

I have a friend who lets her baby sleep with them. I swore I would not do it. GUESS WHAT!!!!!!!!!! I DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It is so much easier and convienent. It is precious to have the lil guy snugged up next to me


Rachael mommy2lucas - October 28

I swore I would never do it either. It helps us both sleep and my mother instincts are always there. Lucas sleeps with one or both hand on me to make sure I am there. A lot of times he has grasped my pajamas with both hands. It is so cute. I love kissing his little head in the middle of the night. I love that little turkey!


Heidi - October 28

I refused to co-sleep till I met my little girl!!!! It's amazing how I do everything I said I wouldn't. Many times I've woke up to her spitting up next to me and I'm glad she's right there so I can make sure she's not choking and wipe her up so she's not laying in it all night! I too love waking up and seeing her peeking at me and worming her way over to me. Sometimes I wake up to her just squeeling in her sleep and then she stops and goes back to sleep. It's so funny! She talks in her sleep all the time. I wonder what she's dreaming about??


Narcissus - October 28

There are safe ways to co-sleep. Dr Sears Baby Book states them to be; 1) Place baby on his back 2) Place baby btw mother and guardrail or push the bed flush against the wall. The baby should never sleep btw two parents. Be sure there is no crevice btw the bed and the wall or the guardrail and mattress. Fill any gaps with rolled blankets. 3) Do not sleep with your baby if under the influence of drugs/alcohol 4) Avoid overheating from overbundling (your body is a heat source) 5) Use a big bed with few sleepers. Too small or too crowded a bed space is unsafe - a king or queen bed is a MUST for safe co-sleeping. Avoid letting older siblings share the bed with the baby. 6) No wavy water beds 7) Take precautions to prevent baby from rolling out of bed, even though it is unlikely, especially when baby is sleeping next to a parent. Like heat-seeking missles, baby gravitate toward toward the parent. Still, use a guardrail for maximum safety.


d - October 29

Sometimes, when I'm really tired I'm a heavy sleeper and my husband noticed I had sq and as much as I could I'm a


d - October 29

noticed that I had squished his legs some how with my legs on top and woke me up. My husband did not sleep with me in the queen bed to give us room, but he would come in and check on us during the night. In the first month I was very weak and nursing him and keeping the infant close to me was very convenient. After a month till now at 7 months I have my strenght back, I feed him, he falls asleep in my arms or on the bed next to me and then I put him in his crib which is right next to my bed. Whenever he needs something I'm right there to comfort him immediately. As soon as he falls asleep I put him right back in his crib and I get to have a good rest and sleep freely without dreaming that I may roll on to him. Even when he was in his crib, I used to dream that he was still nursing with me and that my b___st may suffocate him so I would wake up panicking but was releived he was in his crib sleeping. I personally will not take that chance knowing the risks and at the same time I don't think I am missing out on any close cuddly stuff while feeding or till the child falls asleep.


Shannon - November 1

i'm so glad this concern was posted and that so many people have responded. my baby is only a week old and i've let her sleep in my bed the past few night because of how convenient it is and how exhausted i am. i'm an EXTREMELY light sleeper and wake up every couple hours to check on her, whether or not she's making fussy noises, but i was still worried. so, i'd like to thank everyone who replied to this post!



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