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I think yo ur husband having avasectomy is the way to go. It's permanent and no nasty side effects for either of you, just a simple procedure for him.

I know a vasectomy would be the easiest, but dh is struggling to make a decision. I am going to need to do something else until I can convince him to do it.

I love my IUD. I have the mirena. It's good for 5 years. We're using it right now while we decide if we want more kids, or if DH should get snipped. I had some bleeding at the beginning, but now that seems to be gone and I have NO strange side effects and NO pills to worry about. If you have any other ques. just ask! Good luck convincing your hubby! ~spam

Spamanda, did your insurance cover the IUD? Is it painful to have put in? Also, weird question, but can your dh feel it in there during s_x? I ask that because after I had my last son my Dr. gave this to us as an option and he said sometimes the man can feel it in there. Thanks!

kimberly -- I don't actually remember if my insurance covered it or not... it was shortly after DS was born, and we were getting a LOT of insurance bills, lol. I'd have to go back and check but I don't think it did. It wasn't really painful to have inserted, I had it done at about 8 weeks pp. I had some cramping afterwards, and like I said I bled on and off for a few months -- mostly just spotting, and not enough to bother DH or myself, wink wink. I think at first he could feel it, but now the strings have softened up and it isn't an issue. I think sometimes it pokes the guy, lol, and the strings can be cut a little shorter if it's an issue. DH and I agree it's the best BC we've ever used. I hope you find something that works for you. Good luck! ~spam

i have some that of the same problem me and my dh have been togather for 10yrs it took us 6yr to get pregnant we would like one more but my baby is 7wk. i want to wait until she aleast 1 1/2 or 2yr before we have another. i dont want a bc that will mess with my fertility. so what should try. i was thinking iud and we were ready we can have it tooken out.

I have just had an IUD inserted. It last for 5 years with minimal side effects. So far, so good.

Here is my own personal compillation of research that I did on all forms of b.c about 4 yr's ago. Since it's for my own personal use I didn't citie my sources or anything but I did a TON of research and tried to use mainly only reputible sources and I'm sure if anyone wants to look into it they can back up what I have. It's pretty much an explination of how and what of pretty much every type of b.c. I should also mention that depending on your beliefs alot of ppl (myself included) do not agree w/ hormonal b.c when they know how it works b/c they are abortifacient (aka: they often work by stopping an already fertilized egg from implanting...which if you believe life at conception it is something you may have issues w/). Anyways, here is a copy of my info and it should give you a pretty good idea of how things work and the benifits and risks of different types of b.c...there really is no way to insure no nasty side effects. You are messing w/ your hormones w/ b.c (except the Copper implant) which depending on you may or may not bother you. Hope this helps you figure out what would be best for you. Note: Since this was for my own personal use and I view it as a child after conception, I do use child/infant/etc interchangably w/ blastocyst, which is the more "correct" term, so don't take offense.... Here it is: It should be noted that all of the failure rates listed below are the rates of pregnancies that occur while on each form of birth control. They do not include the times when ovulation occurs and pregnancy does not occur. This would include the times when conception does not occur (the egg is not fertilized), as well as the times when conception does occur, however, the pregnancy is terminated because of the blastocyst’s inability to implant into the uterus wall. Some failure rates are also based off of “perfect use,” of the contraceptive not the actual use of the contraceptive. ORAL CONTROCEPTIVES: The Birth Control Pill (3-8 % Failure) ~Also called the Combination pill. ~Contains Progesterone and Estrogen ~The “morning after pill” is a high does of the Birth Control Pill ~Forms of the birth control pill include Ortho Try-Cyclen (which contains Norgestimate, a progestational compound, and Ethinyl Estradial, an estrogenic Compound). A hormone containing pill you take everyday for three weeks. During the forth week you take a placebo. How it works: Works by attempting to stop ovulation. When that fails it changes the lining of the uterus so that the blastocyst (name of the developing fertilized egg during stage four of a pregnancy) is unable to implant into the endometrium (the lining of the uterus). Thus the developing child starves to death. It may also change the thickness of a woman’s cervical mucus making it more difficult (although not at all imposable) for the sperm to reach the womb. Health Risks: The Physicians Desk Reference has a list of side effects relating to the BCP a mile long. They include but are not limited to high blood pressure, infertility, b___st cancer, liver tumors, and cardiovascular disease (heart disease). In a Nurses Health Study done by Harvard over a period of 8 yrs, it was concluded that a woman on the pill is 250 times more likely to have a heart attack or a stoke when on the pill. A study published in a British Medical Journal, done by the Hvidovre University Clinic of Copenhagen in the early 90’s, found that out of the 2,400 women studied, who were presently taking the pill and ranging in age between 15 and 44, 800 of them suffered from some form of cerebral thrombosis (a blood clot in an artery that supplies blood to the brain), although it did not in most cases lead to a stroke or heart attack. Smoking is thought to increase the potential dangers of the BCP. Side Effects: Side effects may include but are not limited to headaches, depression, v____al infections, acne, and weight gain. Benefits: The pill is thought to aid in the prevention of cancer of the ovaries and of the uterus. It should also be noted that one new study (new this month –October 2004-) done by Women's Health Initiative contradicts almost all previous studies done on the BCP, in that they claim to have found a reduced risk of almost all cancers and cardiovascular diseases (hear diseases). However the study also states that at this point in time further research is needed. “Doctors say the type of hormones and the stage of life when they are used may be what makes them helpful at one point and harmful at another.” We're still learning more and more about the biology," said one of the researchers, Dr. Michael Diamond of Wayne State University in Detroit.”” Mini-Pills (1 - 13% failure rate) ~Contains Progestin –a progestataional compound/ a type of progesterone ~Forms of the mini-pill include Nor QD, Micronor, and Ovrette A pill you take everyday. Different from the combination forms in that it does not contain estrogen. You also take the pill consistently, in that you never take a placebo. How it Works: Works primarily by changing the lining of the uterus, thereby preventing the implantation of the developing child. It may also inhibit ovulation in some women, although many of the women taking the mini-pill continue to ovulate every month. It may also thicken a women’s cervical mucus. However, if taken late by even a couple of hours the thickness of the cervical mucus will be greatly decreased. Health Risks: Ectopic Pregnancies (when the embryo implants out side of the uterus, typically in the fallopian tubes), can be life-threatening to the mother. If not identified right away the mother could die from sever hemorrhaging caused by the rupturing of the fallopian tube. The child always dies. Side effects: Depression and disturbance in menstrual cycle Benefits: The Mini-Pill is considered safer then combined oral contraceptives, such as the pill. It is a possible option for women who can not take other forms of BC because of the health risks involved with estrogen containing combination forms of BC. Note: The mini- pill is much less effective than combination oral contraceptives, and you are much more likely to get pregnant if late in taking a pill than you are with combination oral contraceptives. Non-Oral Forms of Hormonal Birth Control The Patch (Failure rate estimated to be 1% with perfect use, 5% with actual typical use) ~Also called Ortho Evera ~Contains Norelgestromin, a from of progesterone, and Ethinyl Estradial, a form of Estrogen. A sticky “patch” that you ware on you stomach, b___tocks, or shoulder, it provides a continual release of the hormones into you system. The patch is changed every week for three weeks. During the forth week of your menstrual cycle you do not ware a patch. How it Works: Works the same way as combination oral contraceptives, such as the pill. It attempts to stop ovulation. However, when it does occur the lining of the uterus has been altered to inhibit the implantation of the child into the uterus. Risks: Same as the birth control pill/combination oral contraceptives. Side Effects: Same as the birth control pill/combination oral contraceptives Benefits: You do not have to worry about remembering to take a pill everyday Depo-Provera (.5% failure rate) ~Contains progesterone An injection of the hormon. How it Works: Works the same way as the mini-pill and Noraplant. Primary means of preventing pregnancy is alteration of the endometrium (lining of the uterus), therefore prohibiting the implantation of the infant. Also thickens cervical mucus. While it may stop ovulation in some women, 30% of women on Depo-Provera continue to ovulate regularly. Risks: Hemorrhaging and ovarian cysts Is also some indication that it may increase the likelihood of b___st cancer and cervical cancer? There have been studies pointing to a higher rate of neonatal and infant deaths for those children whose mothers were on Depo-Provera when becoming pregnant with them. Side Effects: Weight gain, hair loss, and allergies Benefits: Do not have to remember to take a pill everyday Nuva Ring (2% failure) ~Contains Progesterone and Estrogen ~Also called Vaginal Ring A soft flexible ring containing hormones that are released into the system continually, the Nuva ring fits into the upper portion of the v____a near the cervix. It is worn for three weeks at a time. The fourth week it is not used. A new ring is needed every fifth week. How it Works: It works like the combination oral contraceptives by attempting to stop ovulation, by thickening the cervical mucus, and by thinning the endometrium (the lining of the uterus) so that if conception occurs the developing baby is unable to implant into the wall of the uterus, therefore starving to death. Risks: Thought to increase the chance of a heart attack and/or stroke, especially amongst smokers. Side Effects: Yeast infections, respiratory infections, nausea, irregular bleeding, and mood changes Norplant (1-5% failure) ~Contains Progesterone Six Silastic (a soft rubbery compound) capsules, approximately the size of a match stick, are inserted under the skin in the upper arm, were they may be left in for up to five years. The hormone is released continually into the women’s body. Not considered an option for people looking for a short term form of birth control, norplant cost approx five to seven hundred dollars to have inserted. How it Works: It works the same as progesterone pills. Approximately ½ of neither women on nor plant continue to ovulate regularly. If conception occurs, the changes in the endometrium will keep the child from implantation. Therefore causing its death. Risks: tubal pregnancy, ovarian cysts, may cause a decrease in bone density, Hepat_tis, blood clotting, vision and/or speech difficulties, high blood pressure, enlargement of the ovaries, v____al infections, cervical infections, painful menstruation, and numbness Side Effects: Headache, rash, weight gain, hair loss/growth, mood changes, b___st pain, and facial hair growth Benefits: It is long term, you do not have to worry about remembering your birth control, highly effective in pregnancy from continuing in that it stops the implantation of the child into the womb, and does not contain estrogen therefore removing the risks a__sociated with estrogen containing forms of birth control IUD’s (Intrauterine Devices) Presently there are only two types of IUD’s administered in the US although there are many other types of IUD’s world wide. It should also be noted, that many women in middle eastern communities view IUD’s as a highly dangerous form of birth control because of the many side effects and refuses to use them. As with the Norplant, IUD’s are not a short term form of birth control. There have been studies showing that IUD users are twice as likely to have a miscarriage as a non IUD user is (when an IUD has slipped from its original position and the string can be seen the likelihood of a miscarriage increases to 30%). Copper IUD (1% failure) ~Also called ParaGard ~Contains no hormones, just copper Made of plastic and copper it is a T shaped object that is inserted into a woman’s uterus. How it Works: The copper within the IUD causes and inflammatory response within the uterus. The increase of white blood cells present caused by this response work to prevent pregnancy by attacking “forine bodies,” in the system, including sperm. White blood cells also release chemicals that interfere with the mobility and activation of the sperm. Risks: Uterine puncturing, pelvic inflammatory disease, tubal pregnancies, infection, and infertility caused by an untreated infection Side Effects: Increase (up to 75%) in menstrual flow, expulsion of the devise, and increased cramping during menstruation, Benefits: Long term, may be used up to 10 years, do not have to remember you birth control, and does not contain hormones \Mirena (1% failure) ~Contains levonorgestrel (a form of progesterone) Made of plastic and shaped as a T, mirena contains a form of progesterone. It is inserted into the uterus were it may remain for up to five years. How it Works: Slowly released into the lining of the uterus it causes a change in the endometrium, making it difficult for the newly developing child to implant into the wall of the uterus. It may also thicken cervical mucus. In most women it does not stop ovulation. Risks and Side Effects: Same as those listed for the Copper IUD, and other forms of birth control containing progesterone. Benefits: Long term, no worrying about remembering your birth control, and easy to have removed

Is that true that BC pills mess with your uterine lining just in case ovulation did occur? I thought BC just stopped ovulation. I wish there was a reference for that bit of info....

sarah, im confused by your statements regarding bc and methods that are considered as aborting a an alread fertilized egg. You say bc pills or hormonal methods abort a fertilized egg by preventing it from implanting in the uternine lining...I believe this is the IUD method that does this. The pills actually prevent ovulation all together...so the uterine lining just sheds w/no ovulation or implantation. It is important to state this accurately for those like us that do not want to abort an already fertilized egg...but to stop the egg from being fertilized altoghether. I personally am not in favor or IUDS for that reason. But piils, cervical caps, depo shots, condoms..all prevent the egg and sperm from ever meeting..of course w/the exception of their very low failure rates. plz verity as i did not read your whole post..

Suze, as you can see from my post, I thought the same thing, but I found this article...lifesite.net/ldn/2007/aug/07080303.html. Looks like hormonal BC can cause a fertilized egg to be aborted by affecting the uterine lining. I am really disturbed by this. I wish doctors would tell you this before prescibing you the pill so you can make a more informed decision.

Here is another article stating the same thing...epigee.org/guide/hormonal.html

slack, thx for the info, havent had a chance to read it...(5yr old, 3mo old, dinnertime..you get it! lol) BUT that is very surprising about the pill HOWEVER it does prevent you from ovulation MOST of the time unless you miss a pill or take at the wrong time...then you could drop an egg...so at least I know if im taking it regulalry then im preventing ovulation. However, with the IUD the whole gist is to make the uterus uninhabitatble for a fertiized egg...and thus it sheds the "zygot, blastocyst" w/the rest of the lining b/c it cannot adhere due to the obstruction. This is why i dont feel good about the IUD. I do not judge anyone who uses any form of BC...i just want to find one that doesnt abort early blastocysts....even w/the evidence...i feel w/pills it is a rare case that you ovulate, get fertilized if you are taking it regularly. Hell, i think vasectomy is looking better all the time. :)

slack, interesting articles... thx.

IUD's do work by stopping implantation, but so do ALL other b.c as well. There are many many sites and info on it so do some searching on it. All combined pills attempt to stop ovulation but the combined pill (which is about as good as you get in regards to preventing ovulation) fails to prevent a viable confirmed pregnancy about 5-8%. Since there is no way to tell that you have conceived until after implantation, it really can only be guessed at how often this occurs. Now if you consider that 5% of the time a confirmed, viable pregnancy results how much more often does breakthrough ovulation occur, conception occur, but the baby is unable to implant? It does occur and there is no way of knowing that you've ovulated and conceived. In most cases you'll never even realize that you were pregnant. If you want I can find some info, but if you do a search on it you should be able to fine plenty of reliable sources on this info. It's not a disputed fact by anyone in the medical/science community. Also if you understand the biology behind it you can see that you really can’t control 1 thing w/o the other also being effected, since the hormones that influence ovulation also effect the lining. Both estrogen and progesterone play a roll in ovulation and the endometrial lining, they are to closely linked to not effect one and other. Overall though the main job of the estrogen in b.c is to attempt to stop ovulation, however, it does have a minor effect on the lining as well. The progesterone also has some things to do w/ ovulation, but it's main job is to affect the lining. This is why the IUD, Depo, etc, work by stopping implantation (it also thickens CM some); they only contain progesterone. When b.c first came out it actually only contained estrogen in an attempt to stop ovulation. It fail to do this so often though that it wasn't working all that well in preventing pregnancy. So, progesterone was added to work as a secondary method to thicken cm and stop implantation. It's really up to you what you do w/ this info, but I fully believe that ppl should be more aware of how b.c works which is why I mentioned it. I personally use the Creighton Model of Fertility which is a form of NFP b/c dh and I can not personally justify using something that we feel abortive. We believe life starts at conception, and although the pill does attempt to stop ovulation, the facts that known pregnancies occur that often means breakthrough ovulation is not all that uncommon. Again though it's your choice and I’m not knocking ppl as what you do is between you, your conscience, and God, not me. I simply want ppl to be informed before they make decisions, especially when it's something that goes against what a lot of ppl feel is right...they just don't generally tell you this when they give it to you, but as I said it's known and not even a disputed fact medically/scientifically.

suze42, you said pills, depo, etc. prevent conception...depo actually doesn't attempt to do this. It only contains progesterone and no estrogen. It does stop ovulation some times (as I said in my above post the estrogen and the progesterone both effect ovulation and the endometrium, but the estrogen main job is ovulation while progesterone is the lining and cm. So since they both effect both things it can at times prevent O'ing but it's main goal is to work on the lining). I know you said you didn't read my whole post, and you are right that it is important to state this stuff correctly for those who have issues w/ stoping implantation. That is why I stated what I did. I want ppl to be aware of how it works so they can make informed decissions, and so many ppl don't know how the pill works. What I stated is 100% correct, and I stated it so that ppl would have that info. I have done a TON of research on this. I also have a degree in cell biology so I do understand how these hormones affect our bodies and the rolls they play in conception or the prevention thereof. I don't know how much you read of my original post but I list almost all types of b.c as of a couple yr's ago when I did my research, and it lists how they all work and the benefits, risks, and side effects of each (so I fully understand the way they work). I didn't read the article that was listed and it is probably true that the more precise you are w/ taking the pill the more likely the estrogen will work at preventing ovulation, but it's still not going to work 100% of the time. As for my original post I'm sorry it's so hard to read. This site doesn't keep the paragraphs and such in which make that whole mess a lot easier to read. Good luck w/ whatever you decide and I would personally really encourage a vasectomy if your 100% you are done w/ kids. It's easier all the way around, healthier for you (b.c really has some bad risks. I have come across a few doc's who for no moral reasons relating to the implantation or anything will not prescribe it b/c they feel it's so unsafe....pretty much I've seen quotes by a few different OB's that essentially say its a huge money maker so it stays on the shelf but if it were any other drug...) and you def. don't have to worry at all about possible conception that can't implant w/ a V. Again good luck on your decision.