Drug Baby

13 Replies
Rabbits07 - February 7

My sister's niece just had her baby last week. He was full term and only weighed 3 lbs. 12 oz. As we all suspected test results that came back yesterday showed that he is a drug baby. Poor thing....addicted to drugs because of his incubator (I don't feel she deserves the t_tle of mother.) He is still in the hospital and social services has already been informed and the baby will NOT be going home with her. (thank goodness) Social services has contacted the maternal grandmother (my sister's sil) and asked if she is willing to take him. She is struggling with the decision...not because she doesn't love or want him. She already has that same daughter's oldest son who is 4, plus she has custody of her other daughter's 2 children who are 6 and 3 so she has a full plate. She is concerned about her ability to take care of him given the fact that he is drug addicted and all. Does anyone know what some of the problems are that he is likely to encounter given the circ_mstances? I think maybe if she knew what to expect exactly it would be a little easier on her. She just learned all of this yesterday so she is overwhelmed. She's already received calls from the social services and a local drug referral clinic and early intervention services so it was all dumped on her all at once. Also, the social worker told her that if she didn't want to take him that the next option would be given to the paternal grandmother and that would definitely not be good! Mary (the mat. grandmother) is really in a hard position so any info is appreciated.


babyboy46 - February 7

Oh my goodness, i don't have any advice but just wanted to say how sad it is that this happening right now. I hope your family pulls through this for the sake of that poor little baby. if you don't mind me asking, what drugs were taken during the pregnancy?


ry - February 7

I'm sorry, I too, dont know anything about these situations but my heart is broken for that poor baby...and grandmother! What a predicament to be put into!


Rabbits07 - February 7

They only said that the baby had tested positive for drugs and that more tests were being done to find out exactly what all. She claims that all she took were Loritabs which were prescribed to her for pain. She was in a car accident back in May and had to have reconstructive surgery on her face. She was already doing drugs well before that though as that is why her mom has custody of her 4 year old. Apparently she had only went to 4 appointments at her ob during her entire pregnancy. Yet she was telling the family she was going and even making up stories about her ultrasounds and stuff! Her first baby was stillborn at full term, the second was her son that her mom has custody of and she's had 3 subsequent m/c's and now this baby. The family's suspicion is that she gets preg so she can get Medicaid (a govt med insurance program for the low income) to pay for her drugs. She is currently up on charges for several different drug related crimes....forging prescriptions, etc. Anyways, the reason the family believes she gets preg on purpose is because when she miscarries she doesn't inform them that she is no longer preg (In VA you have to either be preg or on TANF--welfare check-- to get medicaid if you are an adult). She was caught each time and the insurance ended up denying payment and the bills were sent to her mom. Her mom said she never seen the same dr. twice and there were several bills from different pharmacies for pain meds all within a short period of time. I just find it so appalling that a person could knowingly get preg, knowing that they are drug addicted and the harm it could cause to their child, just to try to get the govt. to pay for their habit. I don't know what else if anything she was taking, but I know the bio "father" of the baby, who is my cousin, is a druggie too and does cocaine and heroine...or has in the past anyways. The "mom" says she used to do coke and stuff, but doesn't anymore. She's a habitual liar so who knows.


sahmof3 - February 7

That is so sad and pathetic. I don't have any advice either. I hope the poor baby will be ok!!


mosley12 - February 7

my little cousin was born a crack baby. at term she was 4 something. im not sure his exact weight. my other aunt ended up taking him in, and when he was about 2, his mom and dad had cleaned up there act and was reawarded custody. they lost it again last year and now he lives with my grandmother. he's 11 now. im not sure exactly how everything was when he was born because i was only 9, but i know that even though he has bad asthma and gets sick really easily, he's a healthy , very smart, thriving boy. he's small for his age, but doing very well.


JenniferB - February 7

I am so sorry for this baby. I don't mean to sound insensitive but are these children really in the best hands? If the baby's grandmother has custody of both of her daughter's children will they be raised in an environment that will lead them to the lives that their mother's have led? I mean the grandmother raised the mothers didn't she? Do you get what I am saying? I am not trying to be judgemental. Maybe it wasn't the grandmother's parenting. Maybe she just had the misfortune of getting two bad eggs. Either way, I hope that the baby is okay and someone loving raises him. If I were the grandmother, I would take him. She has his sibling and he needs some sense of family. Poor baby


Gavinsmom - February 7

Hi Rabbits! My MIL has had full custody of her niece since she was born. My MIL's sister was and still is a crack head and does any other drugs that she can get her hands on. So, we can only a__sume that she used during her pregnancy , as well. My "sister-in-law" (the little girl born to this drug addict) calls my MIL "mom" b/c she raised her since birth. She, for the most part, is your average 8 yo, but she does have some problems in reading. Not sure if this is drug related or not b/c I know other kids that have problems in diff subjects and they were not exposed to drugs in utero. I hope this situation gets figured out...it is just SO sad! These poor babies have no say in this matter...it's child abuse! The little baby is in my thoughts!


Rabbits07 - February 7

JenniferB, I understand what you are saying and anyone who didn't know her would wonder. The reason she has the other daughter's 2 children is because the daughter was only 14 when she got preg the first time. So grandma was really his main provider and when the daughter decided to run off and marry another man at 17 the grandma told her she wasn't taking the baby because she didn't know the man that well and the daughter didn't fight her about it. She ended up with custody of the second child because her daughter ended up leaving her dh and ran off with another man. The little girl cried all the time because she hated it and so her mommy took her to grandma and left her. This other daughter is not on drugs or anything...just needs to grow up. I think it was a shock to Mary when the baby was born as her daughter really had her convinced that she was doing so well. I hope the poor little fella fairs well. The dr. said he was nearly starved to death...he currently has a feeding tube.


Rabbits07 - February 7

Thanks for those who have related their own or known experiences. I think her concern is that he would have some major problems that perhaps would be better dealt with by someone more experienced to deal with it. If he ends up going into foster care though there is no guarantee that they would be any better experienced to handle it than her.


JenniferB - February 7

I understand. Even good parents can end up with selfish children. Sometimes we try so hard to do for our kids that we do too much and they don't know how to take care of themselves. I feel for this woman. I feel even more for the poor kids. Hopefully she is a younger grandmother and able to keep up. It breaks my heart. I don't know how people can hurt their own babies.


djh - February 7

Hi Rabbits, it is my understanding that prenatal exosure to teratogens (like drugs) can cause a host of problems or luckily for some, nothing major. If the mom did street drugs as well as alcohol the problems can be compounded, combined with poor nutrition, it gets sad. If she did meth or coke the baby could have had a stroke due to the increased blood pressure it suffered while she was high, the poor nutrition could cause slow or diminished brain development. With the human brain it is not just size that matters. The brain has all those folds in it to increase its surface area, the more folds the better, so that can cause developmental/intelligence problems. The nervous system can have glitches in it so ADD, ADHD, perceptional, emotional, or behavioral problems can occur. The digestive and other vital organs can have physical or functional problems. The child can have delayed or reduced muscle activity and coordination. It would be prudent for the family to look for GERD, bluish tinged lips (heart development), asthma, developmental delays, inability to console the baby, a high-pitched cry (like a cat), and other signs that "something" is just not right. I feel so terrible for these tiniest victims of addiction, poor judgement, selfishness, and in utero abuse. My heart goes out to your family and that precious little one.


AlissaF - February 7

Rabbits- my mom is a foster parent and I have seen a couple drug affected kids and babies pa__s through her house. With babies, the hardest part is the first coupe weeks when the baby won't stop crying (withdrawals). After the withdrawals are over, the babies have always seemed like regular healthy babies except for a few small differences. drug babies are very tense and don't relax very easily. They often remain smaller. And they might be a bit behind in development. Depends on the severity of the use. Drug affected babies fare much better that Fetal Alcohol babies. I think the hardest part of raising a drug affected baby comes when the child is a little older. Many drug babies have behavioral problems and/or learning problems. All in all, these children require more care and attention, but as a newborn, after the withdrawals supside, he really shouldn't be much of a problem.


srigles - February 7

I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to say how devastating the whole situation is. That's so incredibly sad.



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