OT Just A Vent

8 Replies
meagan1227 - January 15

i know this girl who is 24, she would have 5 kids, but one of them died in oct 2005. she is 2 months pregnant now, and she has a 5 year old, 2 year old, and a 7 month old. every one of the kids has a different father, which none of them are around. she lives in a gov. apartment, recieves food stamps, medicaid, wic, and i guess a check every month for the kids. she does not work and i don't think she is trying too. i know she cannot get child support because the kids fathers are not in the country anymore. i just want to know why would she keep popping kids out if she knows she is not going to be able to provide for them. i am not trying to start anything, but why would you want to do something like that? i'm 17 and yes my son has medicaid and he gets wic, but i am finishing school and going to get a degree in something. i made my mistake once, but i'm not going to go and keep having kids if i know i will not be able to provide for them. sorry i just had to vent, it just makes me mad when i know people are out there working hard, and then get taxes taken out and have to provide for people like this


aurorabunny - January 15

Meagan , I'd be willing to bet that almost everyone knows or knows of someone like that. And while there are unfortunately people out there that are bad mothers and those that just use and abuse the system, I don't believe it's possible to really know all the details of everyone's situation. It can be a frustrating situation, but if your son is on medicaid then at least you know that your tax dollars are going to a good cause, if only for some people. Dwelling and holding onto situations like this will get you no where--there will always be people like this and worse, I would say just forget them and try to focus on being the best mom that you can be. Thankfully despite the few bad apples there are many out there that really need (and appreciate) the help that comes in the form of wic, foodstamps, and medicaid.


EricaG - January 15

meagen, I know exaclty what you mean and I get upset too. When my stepsister found out that I was pregnant her exact words were "I want a baby too!" and 3 months later she was pregnant. The difference is my husband is an electrical engineer, her husband is a sandwich maker at subway. We have 90% coverage insurance, they use medicaid. We rent a two bedroom two bathroom townhouse. they rent a low income housing one bedroom apartment... oh the differences go on and on. I just can't believe that they would actually choose to put themselves in a situation like that.


mommieto3 - January 15

so what she gets medicaid and wic.....my hubby works full time and i work part time and we still qualify for wic and i take it the way i see it i work and pay my taxes and if i get a little help so be it and i got medicaid and food stamps with my first son after his dad and i divorced , when i was a single mom working my a__s off to support him and didnt have insurance to take him to the doctor and the food stamps a__sisted me in feeding my son i will not bash anyone that qualifies for it the help was there for me when i needed it


lindsay - January 15

i have no problem with people who actually need SUPPLEMENTAL a__sitance to get it.. i do however have a problem with lazy trash who have no intentions of EVER being accountable for their own families and just keep popping out babies who will likely fall into the same cycle...


lenae - January 15

I think that for those, like myself, who need the wic, medicaid and foodstamps for a while but then try to get off it as soon as possible that we are doing what we need to do to take care of our children in a time when life is rough, but to have babies just to receive or continue the a__sistance is way overboard. My hubby works full time and so did I until sept 05 when I got fired for being put on a work restriction by my doctor during my last pregnancy. We lost our home due to the fact that my mom, who cosigned, didn't believe we would make the payments and she'd get screwed. So now we live with a relative of my hubby who was kind enough to let us move in, but he definately makes out better than we do. We pay all the bills, buy all the food and fix anything that breaks as the uncle doesn't work and his parents paid for everything before we moved in. Only thing we can't afford is property taxes and homeowners insurance. I am glad to get the a__sistance I receive. I was checking into sec 8 housing but our office here says it is closed for at least the next 2 years and our credit is bad enough that we have to fix it some before we qualify for affordable housing help. But at least we are trying to fix our financial problems and get off the a__sistance, but if it comes down to accept the a__sistance or my kids go hungry, I'm taking the a__sistance. However abusing the system just cause you can is wrong. I am also going to try to get back into college this spring and check into being a midwife or doula, that way I get to see the babies and won't want another (hopefully) since I am getting fixed after my lil girl is born soon. That and my bad experience with my first son's delivery, makes me want to help others not have to go thru the same thing I did. I heartily agree with Lindsay. Mommie, I think she meant that the girl isn't trying to NOT need the help, where as you were tryng to not need it and make a better life for your lo. It sounds like this girl is having babies so she can stay on a__sistance and not work. I am glad you got a__sistance when you needed it. Once before this we needed it and got turned down for no reason other than the woman who was a__signed to me didn't like me. If it hadn't been for dh's family, we might have had to give our son up. We also live in Michigan so job security here is a bit low. I am glad that help is there for those of us who need it but wish that so many ppl wouldn't abuse the system. This grirl I know gets all the help she can possibly get and yet she can afford a new caddilac and brand name everything for her kids. Not to mention going out all the time and gambling all kinds of money away. Damn if you're just gonna throw it away, give it to me, I can use it!! Those ppl who abuse it make me angry. Not the ones who need it, and stop taking it when they don't anymore.


sahmof3 - January 15

Well said, aurorabunny!!! I am one of those who needs it and can appreciate it. My dh has a good job and he's been there for 12 years. Insurance premiums have risen by 30-50% each year for us for the last several years and his (small) company can't afford the cost. It went from 90%/10% to 60%/40%. It hit us hard, as that is just one thing that you can't plan for!! We couldn't do it anymore and recently had to enroll our kids in PA. CHIP (health insurance for working families). I am so glad that exists for those of us who are struggling to afford health insurance. Unfortunately some people take advantage and have no intention of working. That's pretty sad!


mommieto3 - January 15

sorry guys i mis read the origianl post , i went back and reread it and i am sorry.....brain fart........i agree with everyone she dont want to help herself ...looks like there could be a manditory tubal for her give the kids the support because they cant work and earn a living but stop adding more .......as bob barker said" help control the pet population" well help control her baby population!!!!!!!!!!!


Kara H. - January 16

I personally believe that if you are on total a__sistance - meaning not working or going to school - you should be required to be on depo shot to get your benefits. If you cannot support yourself, you cannot afford another child. I am not saying that about people who have fallen on hard times, but about the ones that are making a career of it (like my sister).



You must log in to reply.

Are you New to the forum? Sign Up Here! Already a member? Please login below.

Forgot your password?
Need Help?
New to the forum?

Sign Up Here!

Already a member?
Please login below.

Forgot your password?
Need Help?