Something Bothering Me Family Related

2 Replies
Gigi19 - June 8

Ok ladies. Here is the story- My cousin and I are very close. I had always wanted my daughter to call her aunt. I made a comment a few weeks ago- Like baby this is your aunt Caroline. Something to that effect. She then had her baby call me aunt. Apparently her husband was not aware of this and said to her............she is cousin Gigi, not her aunt (I know this because they had this disagreement in front of me). That is when my cousin said that she wanted her daughter to call me aunt. The bottom line is that /if her daughter calls me aunt then she has to call all her husbands cousins- aunt and uncle. It gets out of control. I know this whole thing is so stupid, but it is really bothing me now and I would love to tell my cousin that it is fine with me if her daughter doesn't call me aunt, but I don't know how to bring it up as it has become an uncomfortable situation. How do I tell my cousin that I would prefer it if the children didn't refer to us as aunt without making a big deal of it? Thoughts?


Rabbits07 - June 8

I would say something to this effect--'I noticed that it seemed to bother your husband for your baby to call me aunt. I just wanted to let you know that I won't be hurt or mad or anything if you would prefer that the baby just call me by my name. I don't want to cause any problems in your family and I just wanted you to know that I totally understand and there would be no hard feelings about it.' If you wanted to you could also throw in a line about how husbands are so quirky and hard to please ;-D


nic nac - June 8

in my family it is customary for younger family members to call older cousins that are adults aunts and uncles. It is a cultural thing to show respect of elders. I would say to do what you would normally do if it were a cousin to cousin relationship to not confuse the child. It seems the only reason you are doing it is to express the closeness you two have and there is nothing wrong with that. If it were a friend that were close like an aunt I would say use the word aunt because it is easier to distinguish a best friend (auntie) from a friend (miss or mrs. so and so). Or you could just say that you are closer to your cousin than your other cousins and that is the reason why you want your dd to call her auntie. I think it should be based on what is easier for the child. She will obviously see the closeness you two have in comparison to other family members.



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