Taking Turns At Night Feedings

12 Replies
sr - August 18

my husband and i agreed to take shifts. we had agreed he would take the first shift and me the second. he goes to work early in the morning which is around 6 or 7 and i stay at home. he usually gets home around 6 or 7pm. he has his own practice so sometimes he does get called out to the hospital. by the time he gets home the baby has had her feeding and she is diapered. anyway, right now we are not in agreeance as to what is first shift and what is second.shift. we agreed to the shifts b/c it only makes sense that i take the second since he has to get up so early and go to work. i don't mind that, but we have not set a time as to what the shifts are-for example like from 9-3. does anyone have any suggestions as to how to break down the shifts so that we may have peace and everyone will be happy with the hours? please help, we have gone around this for the last three days and i'm getting frustrated at him!!!! thank you for your replies!!


E - August 18

Honestly, I let my husband sleep in the other room and I did all the night feedings. Afterall, I could nap with the baby during the day, and he could not. It was the only fair thing to do. Besides, I thought it was better to have only one sleep deprived person in the house. I saw no wisdom in there being two. On the weekends, I did the night feedings, and he would relieve me at 6-7am and I would sleep until I was satisfied. It works so well, and I highly recommend it. There are no fights about who needs to get up, and there is no resentment. Needless to say, I live for the weekend! I hope this suggestion helps:)


sr - August 18

yes it does, but the only thing is that i take medication at night and it knocks me out, that is another reason we agreed to the shared night feedings. i'm also going to force myself to take naps, that's one thing i'm not able to do. thanks for your suggestion!


E - August 18

I see and I totally understand. Okay, give me some time to think this one out:) It may need to revolve around how tired you are rather than his schedule.


Lisa*9 - August 18

What kind of schedule is your child on? Why doesn't your dh take over when he gets home till his bedtime. He must have a sleep schedule. On his days off this should be your nighttime feedings,he can take over early in the mornings to let you sleep more if you need too. You need to remember he needs his sleep to work efficiantly(sp). He does put in long hrs. Something to think about. As for you if he heasrs the baby cry at nighttime and you can't get up then it is his turn or vise versa. Can you medicine be taken earier in the day so you can hear the baby cry at nighttime. Talk to your dr about this issue maybe the dr has some suggestions. I can't think of anything else to recemmend? Hope you figure something out and everyone gets their proper sleep? Sweet dreams to all? Have you looked nto any books about child sleeping.


Amaya's mommy aka Stephanie - August 18

When Amaya was getting up at night, dh would fix the bottle and I would feed her. That way, I wouldnt have to do it ALL, but he could still get plenty of sleep. He says if he is awake for more than a couple of minutes he has a really hard time going back to sleep. So he would fix the bottle and I would feed and burp her. It worked great for us. We tried the ill feed her tonight and you feed her tomorrow night or I will get this one and you get the next, but by the time we figured out who fed her last, we were both up.


Kathryn - August 18

How does anyone get their husband awake to even help with the baby? I could never understand my husband. He's a firefighter and can jump up at the sound of the alarm but he can't hear a baby screaming?? I just do the night feeding myself.


T - August 18

Yeah, we once had a schedule too. Funny how he conveniently got amnesia after a few months. I am a WAHM, so I could have a nap during the day, but if I did there would be no cleaning or laundry done. The solution: We got a maid, it was the only way to ensure my sanity and his personal safety. He takes the weekends and does the 7am feeding though.


T - August 18

Hey Kathryn do you think you could get a quieter at home version?


kEEKEE - August 18

I did all the night time feeding. I was on meds and had major health problems. So I know how it is to be tired with a newborn. I didn't think it was fair to ask my hard working husband to get up. He had to get up at 5am. He helped out with the washing and cooking(dinner, meals made ahead of time) I didn't ask him to. Maybe you can try to split chores with your husband. Make sure you take naps when the baby sleep. Ask the doc about different meds that won't make you sleep hard. Take care


Tahlia's Mama - August 18

Well after two months (bless) of sleeping thru the nights, Tahlia has now decided that 5.30am is a good waking up time! Ha ha. So as with a few others, I just do all the night feeds. Its better than trying to wake the sleeping lump beside me. Then I have a nap during the day if I can.


sr - August 18

thanks for all the replies and suggestions. my husband and i talked and i will do the night feedings during the week and he will do the weekend feedings. he also has helped with the cleaning and the laundry and he will continue to do that. he will change his office hours from 8 to 9 so that i will be able to go back to my exercise cla__ses. he also said he doesn't mind getting up, but since he also is working on his mba he stays up late and goes to sleep when she has her first feedinig. so i said i would take the week feedings, since this seems fair to him and me. we will both get breaks. me in the mornings and him at night. i'm also working on forcing myself to take a nap during the day. anyway thanks to all of you!!!


E - August 19

sr -that is great:) Your husband will thank you! He must be so relieved. He probably would have come home from work exhausted and cranky, had it been the other way around. As soon as my dh gets home, I hand Aja over to him until bedtime. He wants to play with him anyhow, so it works out for me. Best wishes!!



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