Loss At 8 Weeks

7 Replies
Lou23 - February 29

We went for our 12 week scan of the baby and was told that the baby had only developed to about 8 weeks and had no heartbeat. I had no idea this would happen and we were both shocked and very upset. I fealt and still feel like my world has ended as we wanted this more than anything in the whole universe... They told me that I had 3 options. 1. To miscarry on my own (which was unlikely as I hadn't in 4 weeks) 2. Have a "procedure" where I would take a tablet beforeI left hos and then would return 48 hours lter for the doctor to put tablets inside of me and this would bring on the misscarraige or 3. Have the surgery to have removed. We fealt that the safest option would be to go for option 2 as our hos is not the best for surgery and I want to be able to have more children straight away. Do you think this was the best choice?


Tory1980 - February 29

I am sorry to hear this has happened to you. If you are comfortable with your decision then yes it is definitely the best one for you. I had a silent miscarriage at 14w4d a year ago and it was an enormous shock. I chose to have a D&C but I miscarried on the ward after they inserted some tablets to soften my womb for the procedure. I ended up having a D&C anyway due to retained tissue the following day. Be prepared for a lot of cramping and a lot of bleeding and you may not make it to the 48hours later as it has been a while since the baby died. The oral medication could be enough to start you miscarrying. Take care.


Lou23 - February 29

Thank you for your comments, sorry to hear about your loss... It has been nearly a week since I was in hos and I think that the main part came out I had to look and see I couldn't just call the nurse. The doc could not confirm that it was the most of it and so I am back on Tues for an xray. I just hope I do not need to have the D&C as I have said I am very nervous about the hos doing something wrong which it is renowned for and I would therefore have to go to the mainland for the surgery. I hope that I will be able to get pregnant again soon as I do not think I will be able to be happy again until this happens.


Tory1980 - February 29

Lou, where abouts are you? I hope you don't end up with a D&C if the hospital is that bad. Please don't be upset if it takes a while fro you to fall pregnant again after your loss as for some woman their cycles are messed up for quite some time afterwards. For me my AF showed up 33 days after the D&C which was normal for me and I fell pregnant on my 2nd cycle after the miscarriage. I do know other woman who have waited months to fall pregnant and some are stil waiting. I hope it happens for you again soon though and you will have a healthy little one.


julie2007 - February 29

hi lou - so sorry for your loss. i had a similar one in august (9wks 3d) and had a d&c (my 2nd one last year!!) and i got pg the next AF (with the help of IUI) -- i picked d&c with both my m/c's last year because i was afraid to see the feuts come out, and didn't want the pain of my body getting rid of the miscarriage tissue naturally. and they told me that if all the tissue did not pa__s on it's own i'd have to have a d&c anyway - so i opted for the d&c. for me ----- it was the best choice and it did NOT make me have to wait any longer to TTC again. infact both times i got AF relatively quickly after the d&c's. are you in the US? i am sorry you are not happy with your area hospitals. ---- it sounds like you have already begun the 2 pill process is this correct? good luck.


tcrock02 - February 29

I had a mc at 6 weeks in 2006 and another at 9 weeks last month. it can be devstating. First time i pa__sed it on my own in the hospital bathroom.(our hospital sucks also) 2nd time i pa__sed most of it but hada D&C in the end. I dont think i could handle the medication because i have a low pain threshhold and both were extremely painful for me. Only you can know what you can handle. My AF just restarted after 35 days of waiting. I too am eager to try again but never want to forget the one i lost. i named her Stephanie Grace. The first one we planted a flower for her that comes up every year.God be with you. Keep us informed


nannydjc - March 1

Hi Lou23, My name is Deanna and I had the very same thing happen to me. I know exactly how you feel. I have since then had my second miscarriage.... It is so very difficult. I did not have a choice in how to discard of the baby. I had to have mine done at the hospital due to my placenta being vascular and the notion that I might have had a molar pregnancy. It turned out to be a missed miscarriage. I am in the process of lots of tests right now.......


HeavenisMine - March 1

I had something similar to that happen to me a year ago. I was at the end of my eleventh week, I went for an u/s and it showed the baby only at nine weeks size, laying on it's back, no heartbeat detected. I was completely a wreck! I hadn't planned the pregnancy, but I wanted it, and to find that out was so heart wrenching, I cried for the entire day. Well I was supposed to come back in five days for an u/s and a d&C if I had not miscarried naturally. I had had some spotting before the u/s which stirred suspicion but I tried not to worry because it stopped. Well I agreed and waited, and on the exact morning I was supposed to go in, I was pa__st twelve weeks already, at five am I started having cramps very horribly, my water broke, and so on and so forth. I lost the baby in my bathroom, and had no time to get to the Er. I had to wrap the baby in some tissue, I was afraid of what to do, so I tragically put the tissue in the garbage, and forever felt like a monster for doing that. When I told my mother of it, she a__sured me I was not a monster, I was just scared and there isn't much you can do with a dead embryo, but you know I realize I should have given the baby to the doctor's at the hospital later. My fiance called 911, because the bleeding was so heavy I was soaking through pads within three minutes at a time, I began to get dizzy, and they had to do the d&c at the hospital to remove all of the leftover tissues. .They said they found what could be fetal remains and obviously placenta. I had pa__sed most of the baby at home (it's sad but true...) so they said they would test it and then cremate it. I felt terribly, and wished I hadn't had to see that as the images still haunt me today. I mean it's one thing to lose your baby, but to have to see it's tiny features, eyes especially. I am not trying to gross you out, this is your decision, but it is very possible you could go on your own even if you haven't yet pa__sed the remains. My suggestion is perhaps just opting for the d&c and getting some closure. It was so difficult to carry my baby around like that for five days after discovering the fact. I do not want you to have to feel more sorrow because I know how much it hurts. Usually after missed m/c's like this women go on to have happy healthy pregnancies. I bet you can do it, just give yourself time to heal, and find some good shoulders to lean on. I know no words can help make it better, but you have all of my compa__sion. Hope all works out with whatever decision you make!!



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