Need Your Honest Opinion

4 Replies
Cerulean - April 13

Okay, here's my story. I am currently 28 and have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and we had everything all planned out. We were going to get married sometime this year, then buy the house, then start trying to have a baby sometime next year or the year after. Well, I found out I was pregnant at the beginning of March. My bf was SOOO excited! I was scared at first because I don't have insurance (I had planned on joinging my company's insurance this fall) but then we found a really great birthing center in town that was reasonable and would accept payments. After that situation was figured out I was very excited about the pregnancy. Soon after we decided to go ahead and buy the house now and worry about the wedding later. Shortly after we had found our house and started the loan application, I miscarried (two weeks ago). The miscarriage has been hard on me, but I know that the timing wasn't the greatest and hopefully everything will work out in the long run. So we are still buying out house and have decided to try for the baby sometime next year. Okay, now that some time has passed and I have thought about it, I cannot wait to have a baby. I thnk about it all the time and I know logically it would probably be best to wait until after I have the insurance , but I just don't know if I can. My bf has even made comments about us not having to wait if we don't want to. So I wanted you girls' opinions. The deal with my insurance is they do not look at pregnancy as a pre-existing condition (I think it's like that for all company insurance, not sure) We have had several women get pregnant and then sign up for insurance at open enrollment and be covered from their effective date on. So if you were me, would you go ahead and start trying or wait until after Jan 1st when you already have the insurance? Sorry this is so long winded!


kc - April 17

It's of course a personal decision. Many people do have children who have no medical insurance. Having experienced a miscarriage myself, I understand the urgent need to be pregnant again. But if it were me, I think that I would wait until I had insurance coverage. Since you are buying a home, you will have even more expenses than you previously had, and it would just be so much better if you could wait to have many of the birthing/doctor costs covered by insurance. Check into your company policy...sometimes companies have a "life changes" policy where if you get married, have a baby, have a death, etc., they will allow you to change your benefits, which includes adding or subtracting members from the policy...but I don't know if that applies to you if you're not already signed up. Also, you might want to look into what it would cost to pay for your own individual coverage. It will be hard to wait six months, but just think of all the money you'd save that you could then put toward your baby!


Cerulean - April 17

Thanks Kc for your opinion! That's what I needed to hear. It is the right thing to do and it will pay off in the long run. I did check into the insurance and the "life changes" and it does only apply to people who are already signed up. Oh well, it's going to be tough waiting that long, but atleast I can try and keep my attention focused on the house being built and all that. And maybe we can start TTC around Sept/Oct so the first visit would be around the first of the year if we do conceive right away. =) Thanks again!


deltabwa - April 17

Trust me, babies are very expensive. You are not going to want to be paying for diapers and all the stuff babies need as well as a huge hospital bill. it may seem like you can do it but when it comes down to it, on top of a new house, which ALWAYS has problems, it won't happen the way you think and will only add stress to your relationship. Co-payments are bad enuf to pay. Then there will be the baby's insurance and coverage.. wait for the insurance!!!


frankschick2001 - April 17

Hi Cerulean, when we bought our house, I was scared to death. I actually thought I was having an anxiety attack after we got home from the closing! But of course, that pa__ses. Owning a home is a huge financial burden so if I were you, I'd wait until I had insurance before trying for a baby. I mean, if it happens, it happens, but if you have a choice, I say wait so it's one less thing to worry about and you'll probably enjoy pregnancy a whole lot more than if you were uninsured. It's hard to wait, I know. Especially after being pregnant already. Its probably the hardest thing in the world to hold off on getting pregnant again, everyone here understands.



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