Question About Possible Missed M C

20 Replies
Shannie - March 11

If, in fact, my baby is dead (like the doctors said) How long should I wait for my body to bleed? They wanted me to schedule a D&C after I did some more testing and a repeat ultrasound, but I'd rather not have a D&C. I would like my body to miscarry on its own. Is it possible that my body will NOT bleed out? I went to this wonderful site called Misdiagnosed Miscarriages and there are a TON of women on there who have been misdiagnosed about their fetuses having no heartbeat and the doctor wanted to rush them to D&C, but my question is: How long can I wait to have a D&C? I understand I could have an infection but my baby only measured 6w1d. How long should I wait to start bleeding out? I would hate myself if I was misdiagnosed and went ahead with a D&C if my baby was possibly still alive!! There are women that I've read about that there wasn't a heart beat found until 10-16 weeks of being pregnant. Also, when you start entering the 2nd trimester or get close to it, your hcg levels start to taper off because of the placenta taking over. I would absolutley be devastated if I went in next week and they still didn't find a hb and my levels were going down but they were possibly wrong about my baby measuring 6wks. March 8th is when I was told about the missing hb. It is now March 11th and I have no cramping, no bleeding at all, I'm still emotional, still hungry, still feel like my muscles are stretching. Sooooo many thoughts running through this head of mine. I don't feel like my baby is really dead. My mom, amazingly, feels the same way. It's strange but I can't explain it.


stefkay - March 11

Hi Shannie, definitely get the follow up blood work and u/s before deciding anything. Now, I know there can be that very rare exception, but usually hcg doesn't start to go down (and when it does it's fairly slow) until between weeks 9-12...closer to the end of the first trimester. If your hcg starts to go down this early it is not good. I still think it is too early for them to have seen a heartbeat. Now, usually the heartbeat is always seen by the 7th week or so, but it is true that most women don't get to HEAR the h/b until 10-16 week. There is a difference. On a v____al u/s there is a flicker and the u/s measured the heartrate, but it can't be heard. Later towards the end of the first trimester it can be heard with a doppler in the abdomen. That gets confusing often when people talk about hearing vs. seeing the hb. I'm praying for you and hope it all turns out ok. I wouldn't worry too much about infection just baby stopped growing at around 6.5 weeks, but I didn't even find out until 3 weeks later, then it took another week for my body to miscarry on it's own. I'm fine now too. Good luck!


Whisper - March 11

Hi Shannie. I've heard that the average is around 2-4 weeks after the baby dies for it to pa__s naturally. Everyone is different and it can depend on a lot of factors, such as how far along the pregnancy was. For me, I m/c naturally at what should of been 7 weeks, but the baby was dated to only be 4-5 weeks, so it took somewhere from 2-3 weeks for the m/c to occur. It started with some light pink bleeding, then ceased for around 20 hours, then the actual m/c started. Stef is right, the HCG should not drop till later, so if you get the bloodwork done it will be able to tell for sure what is going on. I think the average as to when a h/b is detected is usually the 8th week, so I still think 6 weeks is a bit too early, although possible, it just a lot of times can't be detected quite so soon. The best thing that you can do right now would be to go to the doctor and have more bloodwork done, and perhaps another u/s to see if they can tell if anything is progressing, but definitely the hcg would be going up if everything is still okay. I pray that everything is okay for you, and know that we are all here for you should the worst happen. Best wishes! I hope everything works out.


wantanotheraftertr - March 14

It took me a week after I was told that my hcg was going down for my m/c to start. I am now 3 days into it. I was 5weeks would have been 6 weeks today. I had an u/s and they couldn't see anything yet as my baby was too small. I hope you don't miscarry and yes the wait is the worst as you still feel hope b/c nothing is happening that you can physically see. good luck


Rhiannon - March 14

Hi Shannie. You must be going crazy right now. I nkow how you feel. My levels started going down at about 7 weks and the doctors told me pregnancy loss was inevitable. After that they found the heartbeat and I was a__sured that everything was great. I lost it at 12 weeks (Oct 05), but they said it stopped developing at 10 weeks. So it took me about 2 weeks to pa__s it. Thankfully I didn't know it was over. I don't know if I could have walked around for 2 weeks knowing. I really really hope everything is good for you. So it can take about 2 to 4 weeks to pa__s it naturally. Good luck to you.


SoSad - March 15

hi shannie ~ this is my 1st post - i too just went thru the same thing. i was 11w and went in for a routine u/s and the doc saw no heartbeat - she was quick and took away the u/s machine before i new what was going on - i had previously seen a healthy HB at 7w 4d -- so i could not believe she was right. she wanted me to go to the radiology dept 4 days later (it was the 2nd of mar a friday and i had to wait till mon or tues for a radiolgy appt) -- but i was too anxious to wait - so dh let me go to have one of those 3D ultrasounds. it was the best thing i could have done. i didn't tell them WHY i wante the u/s - just that i needed one (saturday) that day. it was worth the couple hundred dollars to know that a stranger without any prior knowledge of any absent heartbeats -- and unfortunately she did confirm that we had no cardiac activity, no blood movement and no heartbeat. it was so sad -- but good to know that an independent sonographer was able to confirm. we did go on last monday (3/5) for an u's in our doc's ofc again - and then right to radiology - which confirmed the loss. i had no cramps, no bleeding, no signs of loss other than the doc telling me no HB. so i didn't want to believe it - until the multiple ultrasounds confirmed what i didn't want to be. . . so i had a D&C on friday and feel ok today (physically) - but emotionally i am a wreck. i wanted a baby so very very much - and can't believe it is over now. my post op visit was yesterday and the doc said we are healing fine....but that if i choose to try again i have to be advised that it can result in another m/c and i have to be prepared for that emotionally -- which made me even sadder than when i went in. i am having the tissues tested and the results should be back in about 2 weeks. i am in my late 30's and know that time isn't on my side - but an trying to remain hopeful. if you can get an independent ultrasound to ease your mind i say go for it - it helped make the diagnosis more "real" (??) since it was someone with no idea of my story. my OB said it could take 2 - 4 weeks for me to m/c naturally, and there were 9 days in between all the ultrasounds and the d&c and i had nothing. i knew that once the doc's were sure of the loss - i could not bear to wait 4 weeks for a natural m/c -- so even though i was scared to death about having the D&C - it was physically painless. the only bad thing is that my milk came in 2 - 3 days after it and my b___bs are SOOOO sore and hard now. i hope that goes away soon - as well as all the sadness i am feeling. my heart feels the grief of all of you going thru or having gone thru this -- i wish everyone healing. any one know how long the light bleeding lasts after a D&C? or how long till my b___bs aren't sore / full anymore? i was 11 1/2 weeks. OH - and my OB advised 2 cycles before trying to get pg again - but the OB surgeon who did the D&C said wait 3 - anyone heard 1or the other after a D&C? thanks for listening - i hope you find some support or comfort in my words - i am sorry.


Shannie - March 18

Oh honey, I'm sorry. Thank you for your story and I'm praying for you. Thanks for the advice about the independant sonographer too. That could be an option, actually. I have an appointment next week to see an OB for the first time. (I only saw the emergency room doctor). So hopefully I will get some good news. If not, I'm ok with that too. Its heartbreaking to suffer a loss like the loss of a child in the making, but I know in my heart that whatever happens is God's will and He does everything for a reason. Maybe it isn't our time yet. But I will be praying for you. <3


sososleepy - March 18

Hi Ladies. Shannie, and SoSad; welcome. It's an awful way to meet people, but I'm so glad we have each other to talk to! I'm not so good with what to say, and I'm not sure there is anything to say, although many of the other ladies find appropriate and eloquent words. For a change then, I'll be brief: Big big hugs! SoSad, Mine was at 9 weeks, and started naturally so I'm sure it was much less developed than that. I had the d&c the day after it began. I spotted for about a week... the details are posted in here somewhere in Jan. We were ttc just before the doc said we could, which was 2 weeks later, and I did wait a few days after spotting stopped to ttc. I had lost pg symptoms prior to the mc, so I dind't have any bb problems. Shannie, I don't know what to say. Mine was so different. I would have gone completely nuts if I had to sit and wonder about what was really happening. Shortly after mine began (hours) I really had no doubt. I'm very sorry you have to go through this. Hang in there! Hugs again.


SoSad - March 18

SHANNIE: you are in my prayers - i am hoping the best for you & your baby. please let us know how this turns out. so sorry for all who have had to endure such a loss.


SoSad - March 18

sleepy - thanks for sharing your story - i am sorry for you as well. my bb's have started to subside a little but are still pretty full. the doc says to just wait it out. i have started to get out of the house again - but get sad when i see pregnant women or new babies. i am trying but it is tough. when i go for my 2 wk post op check up late this week - is there anything i should ask about? i have been reading on this forum that some women ask for an u/s to confirm everything is ok internally, and some have their hcg levels checked - i have no idea if i should do this. today is the first day i am actually even able to think about the possibility of MAYBE being able to try again - i am just so afraid of a 2nd m/c. any thoughts shared are welcome. thank you guys for listening. my best to all of you who are courageous enough to share your stories - it really helps people like me.


SoSad - March 20

hi ladies - just checking back to see if shannie has seen the OB yet or had any news on the pregnancy - i hope you got a miracle and all is well --- please let us know - we are all pulling for you! i have my post op on thursday - and will likely have the genetics results as well - and DH is out of town till friday - i might have to reschedule - i don't know if i can handle any bad news on my own at this point - and we are also due to find out boy or girl with the results - the more i think about it - i am not sure i can go to the appt alone. will check back to see if shannie posts.


Shannie - March 21

Hey there! Well, I have an appointment tomorrow morning at 8am. I'm crossing my fingers. I recently got all my symptoms back. My morning sickness is back and my b___sts are starting to get tender again, so I don't know what thats all about. I still feel pregnant. I talked to my mom yesterday and she said she still thinks I'm pregnant, like she can feel it. I know that may sound silly but my mom is kinda special that way. But I'm ok with whatever happens. I've been doing alot of praying for God to take over and let whatever happens happen. I will let you know tomorrow when I get back.


SoSad - March 22

shannie - best of luck at your appt tomorrow!! i have my post op tomorrow and they are going to tell me the genetics test results they said -- i am pretty nervous. mine is not till the late afternoon - so i have to think about it all day. i am still not sure if i want to know the s_x -- and i am praying it was just a fluke and i will someday be able (with God's help) be able to have a baby. i will check back with you tomorrow - but i am thinking about you and including you in my prayers.


julie2007 - March 26

Hi girls - I have been waiting to see what happens next on this thread - Shannie I hope that you are ok - please post. I agree with sososleepy - this is an awful way to meet people but I feel like I know you guys - I had a M/C about 3 weeks ago now - and I am just able to think about talking to people about it. I hope the hurt goes away soon.


SoSad - March 28

hi all - what's going on? SHANNIE - are you ok? been waiting to hear from you - hope you post soon.


HeavenisMine - March 29

Come back!!


HeavenisMine - March 31




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