53 Replies
saturninebeautyx - January 21

Bobbi, I don't know if you still read this forum or not if it's still rolling but I just joined this forum and read what everyone had to say. I think it's awesome that you have quit drinking once you found out you were pregnant. I turn 21 next month and it has crossed my mind to have a gla__s of wine, but I have been talked out of it thank god. I understand what you are going through as I was a heavy smoker before I was pregnant. Some people may think I'm a bad mother because I was smoking and TRYING to get pregnant. I understand mistakes and I think that since you can't sleep and are worried you are already going through enough. Obviously you have regret, and you are worried and I believe those are signs of a good mother. And the fact that you quit after you found out you were pregnant is a very good sign. I'm not going to judge you on the two kids you already have because I am not a judgemental person and I believe no one knows what you go through unless they are in your exact shoes. I am very glad to hear that you baby is fine and mostly that you are doing good also. I wish you the best and I'm always here for support if you need it. I only believe in positive reinforcement. What is done is done, and in your case, you didn't even know you were pregnant.


robyn555 - February 2

Hey Bobbi.... Me too! Im 22 weeks, me and my partner have drunk every night since the day we met. last year was a particular mess for me, I lost me dad and was pregnant a month later. I am 41. The relationship has not been supportive, to the point where my partner has been activly seeking other women on the net, and finding them. THis has been both heart-breaking and incredibly stressful. Also, he doesnt seem to care about me at all. I have been conscious of reducing my alcohol, but not always successfully. I guess I managed a few days in the first trimester with no drinking, but unlike most of the women on these forums, I have been drinking pretty consistently every day, and sometimes a lot. Like you I am worried. I just want to know if vitamin supplements, pomegranate juice, or such may help. I can mostly happily reduce until either we socialise together, or I am freaked about him getting it on with yet another 25year old. I am hopeful that my efforts to try and keep otherwise good health may have helped, and like you, my scan at 18.5 weeks looked great. (its a boy!). Anyway... I guess it just helps to know that a) you are not alone, and b) my mum reckons in the 'olden days', everybody drank and smoked, and there babies were fine. Goodluck!!! Oh, and to all those judgmental cows out there..just do what you do, and dont judge others. You are not qualified.


mirandac - February 12

 I have a daughter who we adopted at birth. The birth mom admits to drinking one bottle of wine a day for the first 6 weeks and then drinking about 10 times during the remainder of the pregnancy. Our daughter has partial fetal alcohol syndrome or pFAS. Her problems are mild only because we are aware of her needs and get the help she needs. She does have some facial malformities which are not obvious to an untrained eye and her frustration level is low. If she were not adopted, she would not be diagnosed and would not be getting help.The symprtoms are not always obvious and often go undiagnosed but these kids struggle and suffer regardless. Bottom line: DO NOT DRINK WHILE PREGNANT. It's not worth the risk. 


mirandac - February 12

And please for the love of God, stop saying people used to drink and the babies were fine. Research it online. Educate yourself. My heart breaks for my daughter every single day. To imagine the potential she could have had if she'd born to a mother who did not drink. Look at pictures of children with FAS. Look at the thin upper lip, the smooth/missing groove between the nose and lip, the smaller eye openings. If there are facial effects, there is brain damage. Someone may say "I drank and my baby is fine" but it may just be that the baby has not been properly assessed and diagnosed. Children are often diagnosed as having ADHD when in fact they have FAS. Please STOP drinking.


Betsycoe - February 18

Just stumbled on this thread and wanted to clarify something. I live in the U.K. And am also a midwife and can confirm that there are NO laws preventing women from consuming alcohol during pregnancy!  In the U.K. a woman's autonomy over her own body (including during pregnancy) is protected by law and she can do whatever she wants to do with HER body during pregnancy. 

Bobbi -not sure if you still check this but I hope you are well and your pregnancy continues smoothly as the last thing you need is to be judged. I've cared for many women who have done similar before realising they were pregnant (including myself with DD2) and all has been just fine.  

Honestly, until you have walked in the shoes of someone else you have no right to take the moral high ground! 



juls33 - April 25

Most of the comments I see on these forums are clearly American puritanical opinions. It's quite annoying how many Bible thumpers I see on these sites casting stones. Many women do not find out they were pregnant and so happened to drink. The human body is meant to take a lot of S**t. Just stop drinking and live a healthy life from now on. 


taraowens - April 6

okay i dont even know how to post a question on here, im 15 and i know youre gonna call me stupid but get over it because im more focused on if my baby is gonba be healthy,, i am almost 3 months pregnant and i have gotten drunk twice one recently and one a couple weeks ago, i had been smoking ciggarettes for the first two or so months and i have been cutting back since. i just need helpful stories because i am so worried and so young i just need some hope my baby will be okay.


Mumtobe2 - April 23

Hello, how is your beautiful baby? I had one episode of binge drinking during my second trimester and freaking out. Have not drank before now and don’t plan to do it agin. Just wanting to know how your little one is doing. :) 



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