Rude Drs Cant Stop Crying Herpes

14 Replies
Cassie06 - May 11

So I decided I just couldnt wait. I needed to know what was wrong so we went ahead and went to the ER tonight. It started off badly as soon as we got there. The nurse who checked me in asked what my symptoms were and when I told her she acted like I was nasty and didnt want to touch me to check my blood pressure and temperature and stuff. Then we had to wait for 3 hours. Once we got back there the dr looked at it and said it was herpes, before testing or anything. I asked him how I could have gotten it since it shows up 2 weeks within being infected, and I havent been with anyone but my husband in 2 years. He said that one of us had cheated on each other, and that I should have been more careful and I would be infected with this the rest of my life and it would never go away. All the while he has the speculum in me and I am crying because it hurts so bad, not to mention I am being treated like shit!! He told me all of this, without even having the cultures back. He gave me some numbing cream and said that the results would be back in 3 days and he would send them to my ob and I would have to find out from him, because I wasnt repsonsible enough to call and get the results myself!! I just dont know what to do. I feel like I am in such shock!!! I want to cry, but I dont want my husband to worry any more than he already is. I just dont see how this could have happened, or what right he has to say these things without proof!! And most of all I am scared this could hurt my baby or my husband. I dont know what to think or do!!!!


Mellissa - May 11

ca__sie... that dr was completely unprofessional and had no right to pa__s judgment on you or your husband. the first thing i would do if i were you is to get on the phone with hospital administration and complain to them about that dr. if he treated you that way, he could very well be treating other patients that way.. and no dr should do that. secondly, i wouldn't worry yourself about it being herpes until you have gotten the results from your dr (or you could call the er and try to get the results, if that jerk will even give them to you). i was worried once as a teenager that i had herpes... and it turned out that it was actually just a skin infection that i've had since childhood, it just never showed up in that region before. i don't know how true it is, but the dr who ran my test then told me that it is possible to have herpes for quite a while and never know it because you don't have an outbreak, and it's not a routine test they do. so even if that is what it turns out to be, don't a__sume your husband cheated on you.. make sure you get all the facts first. there are medications out there that help treat herpes, if that is what it is.. and there are millions of people living with it. i know it's horrible to think that you may have gotten it without knowing.. but like i said, try not to worry yourself too much till you get your results and all the facts. i hope things work out for the best!!!


pari - May 11

Ca__sie dont worry,i read your other thread.....i must tell u that the symptoms u told sound more like an infection which is very common during pregnancy.Dont worry about the stupid doctor,and dont worry urself sick ok,u have to take care of urself and the baby.I am 100%sure the test will turn out negative.....


new mommy - May 11

I had an ER doctor treat me like c___p that way before too. I was only 15 and had never had a pap smear or s_x for that matter. I had contract giardia, which is a parasite you can get by drinking tap water. I got it in Italy. Only noone had diagnosed it yet. I was really sick almost delerious when my mom brought me to the er. The guy really hurt me when he looked at me kept saying that I must be sleeping around, a__suming that I was some s___t or something. That was an experience that I will never forget. The ER doctors can be real jerks.


AppleCake - May 11

Just a word on don't have to get genital herpes from genital herpes, you can get it from cold sores too. My dh went "down there" and the next day he had a cold sore come up. Unfortunately I caught the virus. In theory though, say it does turn out to be herpes- your dh could have quite easily been given a peck (y'know, a polite greeting kiss) around his mouth by someone who carries the oral virus, and then transferred it to you. I also caught the oral one from my dh, sometimes they come up so small I hardly even notice them. As for it harming anyone- don't worry. Unless you have an active outbreak at the time of delivery it will affect no one but you. I would put a complaint in about the doc though- way out of line!


Mina - May 11

I just wanna say that it happened to me to that the doctor said you have herpes after a check up and she was wery rude also. But the results came up diffrent, I didnt have nothing at all.....and herpes is something that somebody can have had for a long time without knowing it until it makes an outbreak....... the doctor was just careless and mean...


Hana - May 11

Oh my God I would have slapped that son of a **^%$££ hoowwwww unprofessional and insenstive is that!!! Listen sweetie you need to complain, that is sooo unacceptable! Even if you have herpes doesn't mean one of you cheated. Listen to what happened to me the other month: I had a beginning of a cold sore (before it fully emerged) and i performed oral s_x on my hubby, the next day he had a cold sore on his p___s and had we had s_x i probably would have ended up with blisters also. Im not saying this is what happened to you, but theres always an explaination, and before you even think of that, get your cultures first and then think of how you many have gotten it- if it is herpes- could be like the rest said, skin rash or something. Good luck sweetie.


Celia - May 11

Ok i feel a bit un-educated now but cold sores are the same as herpes?? I have a friend that get's cold sores alot through the winter months, that makes me a bit nervous! Ca__sie I went through a similar situation years ago with my hubby. He was having problems urinating, we went to our family Dr and because there was no UTI found, the Dr sat us down and told us he had a STD. I don't remember which one but it started with a C. He didn't even do blood work, just threw out this diagnosis. I knew I had been faithful and was FURIOUS with my hubby. I almost left him because I believed the Dr must know what he's talking about. My hubby insisted I get him a appointment with a urologist to see what was really going on. Turn's out my hubby was having prostrate problems and was causing pressure that didn't allow him to pee freely. The urologist had a fit when he was told what the other Dr said. Needless to say, we found a new family Dr! Don't worry yourself until they come back with lab work proving that this is herpes. These Dr's need to keep some of their "opinions" to themselves until they KNOW what is really going on. It almost cost me my marriage, luckily it's 12 years later and we are still together and no more problems since the dr fixed his prostrate problems. Good luck hun!


Celia - May 11

Btw, how far along are you? I'm not sure if it's a standard practice in all Dr's. But at the OB/gyn that I use, they automatically do a swab and test for STD's at your first OB visit. Your dr would have told you if it was something there.


Emily - May 11

oh my ca__sie, you were treated unfairly. I would call the hospital and complain. Also good luck on your results. I kno that infections are very common in pregnancy and I would have thought that the doc would have checked it out more before jumping to conclusions like herpes!


EricaG - May 11

Ca__sie, please try not to worry. A week or so ago I started getting symptoms down there. Itchy, painful, extra discharge and bumps. I knew there was no way it was STD's because my husband and I have only ever been with eachother. When I went in for my 27 weeks appointment I told my OB/Gyn and he said "sounds like a yeast infection". He swabbed a little and the results came back saying it was in fact a yesat infection. It sounds exactly the same as yours, so ypur probably just have an infection. Try not to worry ca__sie, it'll be ok.


scarlett - May 12

That was unprofessional and rude of them. And both you or your husband can get herpes, who says either of you have to cheat? What's wrong with the doctor. I would definitely make a complaint about their unprofessionalism. They shouldnt hire stupid doctors and nurses.


scarlett - May 12 tend to get infections easily while being pregnant. I recently had a v____al infection and my doctor gave me medicines and it was gone after a few days. He said it's because of the hormonal changes in our bodies. Your doctor is really dumb, how could he 'diagnose' anything without actually making sure about it first?!


Rebekah B - May 12

Ca__sie, If you do indeed have it, it is not unlikely that one of you has had it for a while. Pregnancy just allows these things to show up because of the increase of hormones and decrease of immune system. Don't worry yourself about a cheating husband. No one knows him like you do. But doctors can't jump to conclusions without test results. They may very well be negative, and if they aren't, don't beat yourself or your husband up about it. The past is the past. Though there is no cure yet, there are great drugs that help to keep you outbreak free. Hang in there and be strong for baby. The baby will not be infected. If you have an outbreak at the time of birth, they will just do a C-section and Baby will be fine. Take care!


mcatherine - May 12

I am anxious to have Celia's question answered - Isn't it standard practice when you are pregnant for your doctor to check for STDs during your very first pap? Wouldn't herpes have shown up then? I admit I never even asked what they were checking for - just a__sumed when they told me everything was negative - it meant everything...I also agree with everyone - this doctor was not only rude, but what he did to Ca__sie was unethical. I would call the hospital to complain and if the results come back negative for STDs, my next call of complaint would be the medical board.



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