WE FIND OUT THE GENDER AT 2 30PM

67 Replies
mjvdec01 - February 21

I AM 18 WEEKS AND TOMORROW AFTERNOON (THURSDAY) I HAVE MY ULTRASOUND AND WILL FIND OUT IF WE ARE HAVING ANOTHER GIRL OR A BOY THIS TIME. I REALLY WANT IT TO BE A BOY. I DON'T THINK I WANT TO HAVE ANY MORE KIDS AFTER THIS AND I AM AFRAID THAT IF THIS IS ANOTHER GIRL, AND I DON'T WANT TO BE PREGNANT AGAIN THAT I WILL BE LETTING MY HUBBY DOWN IN SOME WAY. DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENSE? I JUST KNOW HOW BADLY I WANTED A GIRL THE FIRST TIME AND KNOW THAT HE MUST WANT A SON THIS TIME JUST AS BADLY. I KNOW HE WOULD LIKE A BOY, BUT HE WOULD ALSO EMBRACE ANOTHER GIRL WITH JUST AS MUCH CARING AND LOVE. HE IS A WONDERFUL DADDY AND HE ADORES MADALYN. I REALLY WANT TO GIVE HIM A SON THIS TIME AND BE DONE. IF IT IS A GIRL HE WOULD NEVER SAY ANYTHING ABOUT IT, HE WOULD BE GENUINELY HAPPY. ALTHOUGH, I KNOW THAT INSIDE HE WOULD BE HURTING, KNOWING THAT HE WILL PROBABLY NEVER HAVE A 'MINI ME' LIKE I DO. MY PROBLEM IS THAT I AM NOT A HAPPY PREGNANT PERSON FOR THE MOST PART, BUT I AM GLAD THAT I AM PREGNANT. DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? I JUST AM AFRAID OF WHAT MY INITIAL REACTION WILL BE IF SHE TELLS US IT'S ANOTHER GIRL. I DON'T WANT TO HAVE A THIRD CHILD OUT OF GUILT AND OBLIGATION, BESIDES, THAT ONE COULD TURN OUT TO BE A GIRL TOO. DON'T GET ME WRONG, WHATEVER THE GENDER, I WILL LOVE MY CHILD TO NO END, JUST LIKE MY FIRST. I JUST KNOW THAT MY HUBBY WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A SON. ANY THOUGHTS? BY THE WAY, WHEN I SAID I AM NOT A HAPPY PREGNANT PERSON, I DID NOT MEAN THAT I AM DEPRESSED. I JUST DON'T LIKE BEING PREGNANT. OFCOURSE THERE ARE HIGH POINTS THAT I WOULD NEVER GIVE UP, LIKE FEELING THE BABY MOVE AND SEEING THE IMAGES OF MY LO ON ULTRASOUND. ANYWAY, I HAVE RAMBLED ENOUGH.

 

Cat24 - February 21

mjvdec it sounds like you are putting way too much pressure on yourself. its not you 'letting him down' if they tell you its another girl because its actually the male sperm which determines the s_x of the baby. therefore there is nothing you can do about it once you have conceived. it seems you picture having another girl with just negative thoughts and images but at the end of the day it will be a baby that you both made together and a baby that will have characteristics of her mum AND her dad. my cousin has 2 little girls and people constantly ask her if she would have preferred one of each, almost like its 'inperfect' to have 2 of the same gender. she strongly disputes what they say and when you see her girls, one looks like a mini her and the other is the absolute spitting image of her dad! gorgeous! what im trying to say it that it seems a bit sad that you have put so much pressure on yourself to 'give him' a boy. i understand that you don't like being pregnant but just try and remember that you shouldnt feel under pressure from your partner or other people who act as outside influences. i hope you get what you want but i also hope you can learn to love your baby for who she/he is and not what they have between their legs. good luck today.

 

bubbasmom - February 21

Hi mjvdec. I posted something similar to this t_tled "gender question" I have a two year old son and found out I'm having another boy. I'm thrilled my son will have a brother but part of me is sad that I won't know what its like to raise a girl and have that mother-daughter bond. It seems that is what you will be sad about for your husband if the baby is another girl. Please know, as I discovered through my post, that this feeling is normal. I also won't be having a third in the hopes of it being a girl. As someone wrote, there is no gaurantee I would be close to a girl just because its a girl. I will love "my boys" to death and I'm sure your hubby will feel the same. I would let him vent, because it can be sad. But that in no way means he won't love another girl just as much. Try to get away from the notion of the typical American family with one boy and one girl. That notion kinda got me depressed as well. Just let your husband share his feelings and let him know its ok to be disappointed. Once I admitted I was a bit sad, I started feeling better and was excited about having another boy. His name will be Ryan. I actually think our kids are right around the same age. My son turned 2 the beginning of the month and Ryan is due July 17th. Good luck and let us know.

 

sarah21 - February 21

Cat is so right-- your husband's sperm determines the s_x. I remind him of that regularly since he wanted a boy and kept teasing me that he was only releasing boy sperm, lol. We ended up with a girl and my sonographer sided with me at my ultrasound and we were like "Sorry, it's your own fault." DH was very good natured about it though and we're just happy she's healthy. It's alright. Your DH will not be able to imagine life without his new daughter once she is here. And who knows, maybe another baby will be in store for you on accident. Wink wink... :)

 

sarah21 - February 21

Dang proofreading before posting is a good idea. I meant to say that I reminded MY husband regularly, not yours, which is how that post sounded. Sheesh I can be a bonehead...

 

mjvdec01 - February 21

Hey everyone, just so there is no mis understanding here, I am in no way saying that I will be unhappy with another girl. I have a daughter already and I know that it would be a blessing to have another. All I am saying is that I know what that same gender connection feels like and I know that my hubby (who is wonderful by the way) craves that for himself. I would LIKE for this one to be a boy so I can be finished having kids. I also have to say that I would feel a sense of obligation to atleast thoroughly consider trying again if it is a girl, if for no other reason then to try and give my husband what I know he dreams about. I haven't met a man that didn't yearn for a son. That said, My hubby will be exstatic either way, and would never pressure me to get pregnant again. He may ask about it and want to discuss it, but he would never try to bully me in to it. I wrote my post initally, late last night and i guess I was a little dramatic about it and that was not my intention. Is this more clear?

 

Precious - February 21

Good luck MJ hope all goes well and u can see your baby!!!

 

fefer1 - February 21

good luck mj! I totally understand where you are coming from. I have a 17 month old dd and was really hoping to have a boy as this is the LAST time for us. Pregnancy has not been kind to me in most aspects...and my husband has a son and twin daughters from a marriage long ago, so he's done with kids. :) 5 is enough! haha..anyways, I really wanted a boy though so he could have a chance to raise him and do all those boy things that he missed out on. He was so sure it was going to be a girl though, and hoped that it would so that our dd would have a sister to grow up with and be close to. It was sweet. :) BUT, we are having a boy and I'm sooo excited to know what it's like to have a little boy around. I would have been just as happy with another girl...but it is nice to have the chance to know what it's like to raise one of each and have the experience. I am sure that either way you'll be super happy...and if you do decide for some reason to have another ( after my dd I swore I was not doing it again because it was so miserable) well,then...you never know. :) Anyways....good luck is what I'm trying to say and let us know!

 

mjvdec01 - February 21

Thank you so much precious and fefer1. I leave for my appointment in an hour and I am so excited and nervous at the same time. After my appointment we are going shopping for the baby and probably out to dinner. I will post again when I get home.

 

ShoppingForTwo - February 21

My husband is one man that I can say doesn't yearn for a son. Since the day I met him he has never perfered one s_x more than the other. He simply wants children and is happy that our children will be a part of him and be a mini him in some way or the other. So maybe you are sterotyping all men and maybe your dh isn't as concerned and won't be heartbroken if its another girl, and subsequently lead you into a guilt pregnancy. You guys can always adopt a boy if its that big of a deal. Good luck!

 

mjvdec01 - February 21

IT'S A BOY!!!!. We are so excited!

 

Cat24 - February 22

shoppingfortwo my hubby is the same. he isnt one of those typical 'i must have a boy to show how much of a man i am' kind of blokes. he just says all along that as long as our baby is healthy and happy that is all that matters. its a good job mjvdec got her boy because she sounded so disheartened about the thought of having another girl. its a shame when people think like that, the thing that becomes important to them is whats in between their baby's legs and i can't help but think sometimes they are being a bit selfish. anyway its a good job its a boy because i dont think she would have been so happy and welcomed another little girl as much.

 

softbreeze200 - February 22

Congrats hon!! That is so great!! Now you will get to experiience what it is like to raise both s_xes!! And go shopping!! Congrats again! I am very happy for you!

 

treshala - February 22

Oh brother...(shhh treshala) Anyways...Mjvdec01 CONGRATS on the boy!! Im happy that you and hubby got what you guys hoped for. I understand where you are coming from. I wanted a girl this time and b/f wanted a boy but we were (obviously) going to accept either way. When we found out it was a boy any dissapointment that i would have felt melted when i saw b/f reaction...now i couldnt see it any other way. Its nothing at all wrong with how you felt and i understand hubby too...most men do want a boy :-) CONGRATS and enjoy...

 

treshala - February 22

Mj have you guys thought of a name?

 

jennifer_33106 - February 22

Dont say it..... Dont say it..... CONGRATS!!!! I am glad that you got a little man in there!!!! NOW your husband has his "little me"

 

Cat24 - February 22

i agree treshala that most men want a boy. i just think its a little bit sad when so much emphasis gets put on what s_x the baby is. mjvdec obviously showed how dissapointed she would be with a girl and i found that a little bit sad in a way, almost like a little girl would have been looked down on a bit.

 

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