4 Replies
sherri - October 29

My husband and I have been married for three years, I am 33 years old (as is he) and this is my first pregnancy. I am 6 months along. We had some stumbling blocks in our marriage prior to my becomming pregnant and my pregnancy has been difficult. I have had a kidney stone, been taken off medication for anxiety that I've taken for years, and throw up on a dime. We also recently went through hurricane Katrina and after that things were never the same. There are a lot of variables that are involved, but we love each other and that is why this is so hardfor me to understand. Recently, I found out he's been having an affair. This is completely out of character for him and I am, to say the least, completely devistated. I have been losing weight to the point where I have only gained 3 pounds in my pregnancy and my blood pressure is getting higher. I feel so alone and devistated. I feel the baby moving around inside of me and it feels so lonely for me, although I know it is a miracle and I love our baby so much. He is still living with this "person" he goes back and forth between us. He calls me and tells me he wants to work things out, then he comes over and says ugly things to me and leaves again. Both of our families have been very supportive and just as confused as I have been by his actions. I don't understand how another woman can knowingly sleep with a married man who has a child on the way. I don't understand how he can turn his back on me and his child or why he keeps changing his mind. I feel like I am drowning and it is all I can do to get through every day. I love my husband and I want us to get counselling. I want to learn to trust him and feel safe with him again. I want to get images of him touching another woman out of my head and I can't. I have had to go to the doctor and admit to what was happening and ask to be tested for veneral diseases, laying on the table crying as he examined me, the nurse holding my hand and telling me everything would be okay. He is drinking more and more and his life is deteriorating. Let me say that at the beginning of my pregnancy I did not feel like intercourse but I kept him satisfied in other ways s_xually. I have not neglected him in that way and we had recently began making love again after I got over a lot of my queeziness. I just don't understand how he could do this or all the indecision and ugliness that is going on with him right now. I don't understand how one woman could do this to another, knowing that he has a wife who loves him and who is pregnant. This is supposed to be the most joyous time in my life and I feel incredibly sad, lonely and humilliated.


nicole - October 30

I am so sorry you are haveing these problems with your husband. I am not in your situation and hopefully never will be, However, I believe if it were my husband doing and treating me this way, as hard as it would be, I would not want him back. He doesn;t deserve you anymore and he doesn't deserve your child. I believe if he is the type of guy who cheats no matter how bad your situation has been, he will always have it in him to cheat. Also, I bet if you stop entertaining his homecoming, he will realize what a special time he is missing out on and future fun times he will be missing as a family. At that time thye power will be in your hands to decide wether or not you take him back. Right now it sounds like he is on an ego high going back and forth between two people. As fo girls who sleep knowingly with married men, they are pittiful insecure people who only feel good if they can steel someone else's man. They will get what they deserve when their cheeting man moves on to his next victim. Only then will she maybe learn her lesson.


I'm sorry - October 30

Girl I am soo sorry your going through this right now especially with a adorable baby on the way...Please feel free to email me just ask me and i'll send out my email if you wanna talk, but I do have some advice stay strong and let him know who is in control and honestly girl you have all of the power even if you don't see it that way you have alot more power in this situation than you think. Lots of Hugs ~ Courtney


Believer - November 5

Sherri - are you still checking this thread??? If so...I'd like to share some of my story with you. I'm 37 and have been in a similar situation...only my husband and I beat the odds and we are still together and better than we've ever been...I'd love you tell you about it...let me know.


SECONDS - January 2

Hi Sherie. Love you and sorry to here abt the disaster that u underwent. If u get time plz talk to him as well let him know that u r aware of his affair with another gal. Alsoo please try to understand as y he is behind another gal. if his motive is just s_x and also confirm if he is behind that gal since u r not satisfying him. if thats the case try to give him pleasure provided you dont harm the baby. I belive at the moment you will have to think more abt your baby than your husband. Remind you if u dont consider your baby u r doing the biggest sin. Love your baby and pray for your baby. OTHERS plz replay on the same Forum and do not invite her to write on your personal mails. if you put your advice on this site it will also help other poor or innocent gals. Good luck.



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