What Is The Wright Thing To Do

2 Replies
kellyloveslucas - February 12

I fell pregnant when I was 19, my very second try of intercource. I wanted to keep the baby and my bf who I'm still with, who was 17 at the time, did not, So I went to my father and told him, he said At first I'll support you, and then 4 months down the track I was pressured into an abortion. I've been depressed ever since my traumatic experience. and too make it worse my bf's bother's gf was pregant also, and I didn't know, she had a baby boy two weeks before I was due. and Everytime I see my bf affectionate with his nefew, It makes me sad and angry. and it also makes me feel bad about my baby to be. Im 23 now and all my siblings are now parents and also his brother has 2 more, even though he's younger then me. All I want is to be is a parent more then anything in this world, but everyone is telling me to live my life the way they think it should be like a yahoo, I don't drink, I don't go out, and I feel everyone is looking down at me like im a 15 year old without a clue. This hurts my feelings, But I don't plan on being 30 when I have my first child as I feel that is too unhealthly for your body. I love my bf as I've stuck by him though four years. Four years on secretly crying, and I'm begining to resent him. I can't talk about it with him, as he doesn't want to hear it. And everyone here I talk to about it says what about his feelings, Well what about mine. I don't hear him crying every night, dealing with a loss, so My question is should I cut my loss and do what my heart wants, stuff everyone else and have my child?


Malica - February 13

Sounds like you really need someone to talk to. Have you seen if the clinic you had the abortion has counselling services, or can recommend someone to talk to who has experience with this? I'm sorry I can't offer much advice myself, but having a child now will not replace the child you would have had if you hadn't had an abortion, and it will not erase the resentment you feel towards your boyfriend. Those are things you need to work through before you try to have a child, and make sure you're in a strong and secure relationship before you start a family. Having a baby is by far the most stressful thing to go through and if you don't have a strong and open relationship it can easily tear you apart.


TatiK - March 2

kellyloveslucas first of all ask your self if you really truly love him. If so it's always best to tie the knot before having a child. If he loves you and wants to be with you what is holding you guys back. A child is not some thing you can buy and return. It's a life you are talking about. Every child deserves good parentS. Both parents, the healthiest families are those that stay together and care for each others feelings. If he doesn’t want a baby, then maybe he just doesn't care so much for you and your feelings. Like Malica said you can't undo what you already did, but you can make a differents to your future child. By making the right choice.



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