40 And Seeking Advice

71 Replies
Sylvie - June 12

So im not sure if i shld bd every otherday after AF or temp and chart CM. Temping and all that is so stressful and focuses too much on making a baby--but I also really want this month to be my month. Any advice especially from those who've had BFP would be appreciated. Im on cd2 of a 28 day cylce. Last month i temped and checkd cervix and cm, bd'd everyday for 5 days around time of 'o' and still nothing. Please advize!!!


Lynette - June 13

It's a cruel and frustrating fact that even when you do EVERYTHING right nature is very inefficient at getting the "little boys" to their destination. Apparently even with the right conditions, timing etc etc there is still, like, a 1 in 4 chance of it working. Sucks, doesn't it?! I'm at the same stage as you (cd2 of what used to be a 28 day cycle but last one was 36!!) so I will wait with you if you like. My plan is what you stated at first - bd'ing every 2nd day from cd6 until next af does (or doesn't) arrive, every day between cd 13 and 15 and twice on cd14 (poor hubby will be very tired!!). This is my 5th month ttc since miscarriage in January so I hope this is our month!! Good luck to you :-)


Pattie - June 13

Im right there with you girls, only because Im 40+ as well. My af was 5/30 (showed up 4 days late). I ordered Clearblue Fertility Predictor ($200), I also BBT at 6:30. I don't really get the temp thing, but I am trying anything at this stage. Also had M/C in Nov. and started ttc again in Feb. This is my first month using the OPK and I just got a PEAK FERT sign yesterday. Right on track with my cramps on my right side. DH and I do the bd every other day and now will every day for the next two days. SYLVIE - the CM is a very hard way to determine (using that only) because every month can be different. If you do it along with the BBT that's a good idea. Every other day is best as it gives tas LYNETTE says the "little boys to build up. You don't want sluggish swimmers. I have heard that right after OV you temp should stay elevated for 18 days which should indicate pregger. Sylvie - stay with it, sometimes it just takes more time than we are willing to give. Lynette & Sylvie good luck to you both. Keep posting changes. *~*~*BABY DUST~*~*~


Sylvie - June 13

Ooops, my apologies, i posted twice!


Sylvie - June 13

Thanks for your posts. Lynette we are on the exact same cd so lets go crazy together this month..lol...i think im going to just bd like you and not stress too much about it. It think thats the key. Stress changes the ph in our bodies and prolly causes all this ttc with no BFP, so this month im just going to dance, dance, dance. Are you temping at all?


Sylvie - June 13

Pattie, thnx for ur response. Yea, i was just thinking it would be hard to track CM if bding everyother day anyway. So dh is going to be very happy this month!


Pattie - June 13

Thanks girls. I know that Lynette had a m/c like me, how about you Sylvie? How "40's" are you gals? I just turned 42 and already have four children. This is a second marriage, got pregger by accident in Sept. m/c in Nov. So hubby and I want to try again. I know the whole "40" year old gargin. I believe if it is meant to be, then ..... Keeping fingers and toes crossed for all us brave 40+ girls and tons of *~*~* Baby Dust ~*~*~ to you all. My temp dipped yesterday OV and went up today. Hopefully it will stay up for many, many, many days. lol Who would have thought I would be excited for a so called "fever" accelleration.


Sylvie - June 13

Hi Pattie, Im 41. I have 3 kids already. DD 14, DS 12, DD, 8. Hubby and i decided we want 4 last oct. So we've been ttc awhile now. I had a m/c on April 14 waited one full period now back to ttc. I really want a son, altho having 3 daughters wld be great also. My son wants a brother, so according to the chinese gender chart i have to conceive this month for a boy. Talk about pressure lol. We're getting alot of guff from our family about why we'd want a 4th after 17yrs if marriage and 3 kids-but friends are supportive. Im just glad to have found this group. I hope u get a BFP in about 2 wks time. Fingers crossed for you and BabyDust back at ya!


Pattie - June 13

Sylvie - I have DS-18, DS-14, DD-12, DS-7 and if I didn't M/C would have had baby June 4th. Our friends are very supportive and so is one of my sisters. My other two sisters, no so supp. Wow it took me almost until January to get back to normal. Never had a m/c before Nov. Every time I got pregger in the past years, all full term. I hear ya, the diaper bag, stroller, car seats all over again. CANT WAIT. I loved being pregger every pregnancy. Glad to hear that other women are in the same place at our age. Keep up the good work girls.


Sylvie - June 13

Pattie, except for ur 1st born, our kids are the same age and if we both get preggs this month that'll be 4/5! and we're in our 40's. Well....baby dust to us!! Keep in touch....hopefully, im just 2wks behind you.


Lynette - June 14

Well - I'm a bit of a fraud because I'm only 34 - but I hope you'll let me stick around anyway ;-). Hubby and I got married in October and got pregnant in the first cycle of trying. Lucky me, I thought. Then miscarried in January - discovered during 13 week ultrasound that the baby had died a few weeks earlier. So anyway, I thought it would all happen quickly again, but here I sit, 5 months later and NOTHIN'! Over the last couple of months I've tried all sorts of "methods", "theories" etc but this month I'm going back to basics... more s_x! I think if I'd bd'd every time I checked my cervix, a___lysed my cm or took my temperature, I'd be pregnant by now (lol!). Anyway, good luck to you both and I look forward to regular updates. :-))


Sylvie - June 14

OMG Lynette...i hear ya!! This month im gonna chill and just bd every other day and each day the week of 'o'. I refuse to check my cervix or cm. Dont care this month. Each time we just let things 'happen', they did. When we try it just doesnt happen. My doc. said the stress of that changes ur PH and lessens ur chances. So lets dance, dance, dance the month away. Keep in touch. I hope we all post BFP this month. Im on cd5. You??


Lynette - June 15

Sylvie, I'm CD4 right now (af started on Sunday, so that's right, isn't it?) Good luck to you this month - I hope your hubby has had his vitamins!! ;-)


Sylvie - June 15

Hi girls, i know this is jumping-the-gun, but do any of you want a boy over a girl or visa versa. Got any ideas about gender selection???


Lynette - June 16

Sylvie, the info I've gleaned as far as gender selection is pretty much that because "girls" travel slower but live longer, and "boys" travel faster and die more quickly, if you have s_x a couple of days prior to ovulation (or as soon as the opk goes positive and then not any later) the girls are more likely to make it, while the boys will "die off" before ovulation day. If you want a boy you are supposed to have s_x right on ovulation day itself but not leading up to it. Having said ALL that, I always thought I wanted a girl, and that people who said the "just want a healthy baby" were just saying that to be p.c., but having miscarried my first baby, guess what I want?! Yep - a healthy baby! Nothing wrong with having a preference though - especially when you already have a couple of kids. What are you hoping for?


Lynette - June 16

Oh, sorry Sylvie - I just read your earlier post about wanting a boy - good luck!!


Sylvie - June 16

Hi Lynette. Ive heard of that also. I think its called the shettles method. I also checked the chinese chart and its accurate with my other kids. Hmmmm...i hope this works for me/us this month. When are u expecting AF? Just curious to see how parallel we really are.



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