Possible Abortion

22 Replies
Big decision - March 18

I've had marriage problems in the past and after what I heard last week I have a good idea of what my h/b really thinks about me. I don't know if I am preg yet but if so it could be anywhere from 3-12 weeks. I was considering a termination of the pregnancy but have to find out for sure first and if so what is the maximum waiting time or is it too late to consider this procedure. I don't think that right now is a good time to have a baby when I may possibly leave this relationship. Any advice.


tara - March 18

Wow, you seem to have some big dicisions to make. I belive in most places the maximum is 12 weeks. Good luck with everything and I hope things work out for you.


MM - March 18

As an alternative to abortion, are you willing to consider adoption? Also, what if you have an abortion & then things work out with your husband? Also, you will probably experience tremendous guilt afterwards. You should really consider all your options before making a final decision, but I urge you to chose life!


martha - March 18

you really think that you uld be able to terminate your baby because you and the father arnt getting along. its hardly fair is it? that poor thing hasnt done anything wrong, and you want a termination because you dont love its hather anyore? if thats the only way you can think of , you can legally terminate up to 16 weeks, however its easier before 9 weeks. i hope you reconsider, or that when you kno for sure that your pregnant, that you feel a little ore copla__sion then you have shown on here. these girls are desperately trying to concieve and you come up and tell them your gonna kill your baby just to spite your husband!


Tiffany - March 18

First of all, have you taken a HPT? If they are coming up -, than you should see your OB for a blood test. I am so sorry you and your husband are not getting along. How heart breaking. I understand you not wanting to bring an innocent baby into this situation, but if you are pregnant there are better options than abortion. Have you thought of adoption? There are so many women out there dealing with infertility.Think of how special the gift of life would be to one of these loving families. You are in my thoughs sweetie, Tiffany


SusanL - March 18

I encourage you to take an HPT. Whatever happens, believe in yourself. You can get through this. Do whatever is best for you. Adoption is of course and option, but if you feel better about ending your pregnancy then don't let anyone else make your decision. You have to do what is best for YOU, and no one else can decide that.


jena - March 18

i would encourage you to first get a blood test and second, if it comes back positive, consider adoption - there are so many wonderful people, including those on this forum, that would lovingly adopt your baby if that came to be the case. take care and be strong :)


leriak - March 18

ive been trying for a baby for 9 years. and im tld theres nothing wrong with me i just havent managed a conception yet. can i adopt your baby, coz i owuld love to be in your situation!


Tiffany - March 18

SusanL ~ "You have to do what is best for YOU, and no one else can decide that." What about what's best for the baby?


Big decision - March 18

This question was not meant to offend. Our marriage was in trouble a few weeks after we got married and I made the step to go to counselling. I also found out that he could have went to jail for something he did. But one of the biggest things that I found out during counselling was that he says he lies so he doesn't get into trouble or avoid conflict like an actor. If I would have found out about the thing that almost landed him in jail a little sooner then we wouldn't be married right now but I gave him the benefit of the doubt to get help. Plus where I work at I was screwed out of a promotion so there has been great stress there as well. I know that has nothing to do with my question but I've had really alot of things on my mind. I've stopped trying to conceive as I thought that would have helped us get closer together but after hearing a conversation that I wasn't supposed to overhear that is what made me possibly come to this conclusion. I really don't know if he does love me in the first place or is he just playing more games? I really wanted a baby up until last week and what I overheard really changed my mind. My parents are older and I don't want them to find out about this until I make up my mind for sure of what I want to do. I know they would be heartbroken if I decided adoption since they want to be Grandparents again. Believe me this is not an easy decision and a BIG LOAD ON MY MIND. If I get a/f in a few days then it will make things somewhat easier until I decide what to do but I won't make a rash judgment just yet.


tiffani - March 18

I think you should have the baby no matter what your relationship is like, but i'm biased and pro life. Just don't think it's fair to end a life because of a screwed up marriage. Maybe counseling would do you both well.


Big decision - March 18

The only other comment I have to make was that I was verbally abused as well when I was younger.


Lulu - March 18

Do what is in your heart. You will have the support from family and friends either way b/c they love you.


To big decision - March 18

This is not meant to put u down ,disrespect u or anything like that, but before considering abortion, check this site out first. http://www.mttu.com/abort-pics/index.html U said it urself , u wanted a kid up til last week, bad things happen, but i don't think it is fair on the unborn child to get rid of it to ur convinince. Forgive my rudeness, i am not being mean to u , i'm just very outspoken.After all the choice is urs & it is ur body and ur emotions ! Good luck!


advice not criticism - March 18

.....but bringing it up in a screwed up environment is best... for the BABY?For most of those pro lifers out there it is usually based on religious beliefs. So, no matter what she decides God will take care of that little life. Take care Big Decision and best of luck. If abortion is your only consideration make sure it's early.


kim - March 18

You should have the baby. I am an open minded person and can understand your feelings. I also have 2 kids, which is why I have the opinion I do. My kids are the greatest gift I have ever received and now that I am a mother I can't imagine ending a babies life. I don't want you to be offended like this b/c you have to make a choice that is right for you. My sister had an abortion to and she says it haunts her everyday. Please just get more information about what all of your options are first.


Big Decision - March 18

I do thank all who have posted their advice on my question and the last thing that I have to say is that if I chose to have it I can't afford to be a single mom and we're just barely getting by now and don't have the greatest access to health care. As I've treid before to get even a test done and it keeps getting screwed up like getting a pap smear instead.



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