19 Amp Pregnant Need Advice Is Anyone Else In This Same Sit

17 Replies
Anna - June 29

I'm 19 and 10 weeks pregnant....and I feel extremely depressed. I love my boyfriend(of 3 yrs) and he seems supportive and even a little happy and excited which is such a relief.....but I fear that this situation will change our relationship for the worse. Right now he's in that phase of his life when all he wants to do is party....and I'm not into that. Right now I need him more than anthing or anyone else...and I feel that he's hardly there to help me. I think that further along in my pregnancy he will understand and get his act together but i need him now. I truly think that he will ask me to marry him one day....but I just don't know when. His parents are sooo supportive(more supportive than my own parents) Another thing is I constantly worry about the condition of my baby....and I fear that I will be even more unhappy when the baby is born than I am now. I just want to know if anyone else feels similar as far as the depression and all the worrying and negative-thinking goes. Please HELP. Thank You.


Sydney - June 29

Anna- I'm 21 & pregnant. However, my baby's father is not in the picture. I had just gotten out of a serious relationship, & then immediately started dating again. Unfortunately, I ended up getting pregnant by a guy I had only seen for a short period of time. I know that this could have happened at a better time for you-I feel the same way. I find myself extremely depressed & lonley. Im sure your boyfriend will come around & I promise you that things could be worse. Though you feel he is not there enough...be greatful you have someone who cares that is there. You will have mood swings..feel irritable, sad.....but in time it will pa__s.....I was so obsessed with being alone-all I wanted was to have someone there---just a little bit! Take advantage of all the family support-it makes a world of difference. When you have time to yourself-read a book about child birth. "WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU ARE EXPECTING"-it has everything you need to know! Sometimes being alone isnt so bad--ive learned thatI can get through it & I have faith that you will as well. I constantly had negative thougths and sometimes still do...right now im trying to appreciate the gift of pregnancy! good luck to you!


Adri - June 29

You need to look at what you have going for yourself. Make sure you get those vitamins now if you haven't already. I know what you are going through. I am 17 weeks and I am worrying about everything. You are soooooo lucky that he's being supportive about the baby. As far as the partying...well...in my opinion there are more things to do in life. Maybe you two can find things to do together that's fun. And maybe if he wants to party make a plan to do a certain day of the week every other week. Baby comes first, and remind him of that. Babies are stronger than we think they are, but still relax and take a deep breath because that helps a lot. Another good book is Better Homes & Garden New Baby Book. It has a lot of tips on stuff like diapers, what kind of crib to get, and b___stfeeding. Also read what NOT to eat.


Anna - June 29

Thank you all so much for all your wonderful advice....it's soooo appreciated.And I am actually already reading a few books....I'm so absorbed with my pregnancy that's it's all i think about. I look up info. for various pregnancy stuff on the internet everyday. I have so many questions and concerns. I smoked a few cigarettes and drank 2 times before I knew I was pregnant and that worries me sooo much. I found out I was pregnant at about 5 weeks. And I was told not to worry about but I can't help but to worry about it. I feel so guilty because I usually don't smoke or drink but when I did I just happened to be pregnant. Isnt that crazy how things work. Anyway I still want to go to school for Nursing this fall, but I feel that I may not be able to make it. I want to go to school more than anything else. I grad. from high school last year with atleast 15-20 girls that either already had a baby, was pregnant at the time, or in my case is pregnant now. I just didnt think I would end up like that. I'm just sooo scared that the father of my child will end up leaving or I'll be this poor lil' girl with a baby that has nothing going for herself. I dont wanna let myself or my baby down. I'm doing everything right...right now....taking my vitamins, visiting the doctor, and doing all the research I can. I have been praying and putting my faith in God because I know he will take care of everything.


Angel - June 30

I feel you on that. I am 19 years old also and now 6 months pregnant. I cry a lot at night because I wonder where my boyfriend is and what he is doing. He seemed okay with the fact that we're going to have a baby in September and he said he'd be here for me and the baby. But so far, the only people supportive of me are my family and friends. His mother and both sisters love me and they support me as well, but they are not my baby's father...I would love to have him by my side and help me to determine what is right for our son. In your situation, I sort of think things will work out well. At least your boyfriend talks to you. I haven't talked to mine in over a month and that stresses me out. I nearly ran my own blood pressure up worrying about this situation. Good Luck to you though...


all alone - July 1

I am in the same type of situation as Sydney. I was only dating the father of my child for a very short time and got pregnant. He has not given me any support whatsoever. I am sure he will come around and if he doesn't then you will be strong enough to handle this.. It is very hard for me everyday when I see happy couples expecting when I cant even get him to go to a doctors appt with me. I am very thankful for my mom and the rest of my family though, they have been very supportive. I dont know if his family would be or not because he has not told them. I have gottn past the point of major depression though and I am very happy about my baby girl even if her father is not in the picture. Being pregnant is awesome...Wait until you can feel your baby move or hear the heartbeat, it will change everything!



Loving Christian couple wishes to openly adopt! We are a secure and stable couple wishing to make our family of three grow by two little feet! http://www.adoptionprayer.com


Sydney - July 8

Hey Anna--ironically I also found out at 5 weeks that I was pregnant & have continuouslllly stressed over the fact that i smoked & drank prior to knowing! My doctor has a__sured me that everything will most likely be fine b/c when we drink & such that early on during pregnancy it is affected through a miscarriage...considering both you & I are past that early phase, we are promised a good chance! I recently found out that my blood test was normal so as far as we know, it's healthy! Very exciting! I find out in two weeks if it is a boy or a girl...i'm ever so anxious about this!!! Angel--i am barley 4 months & I feel ya! lots of lonely sad nights! we will all make it! family support is the greatest! ALL ALONE--, I find it very hard doing this on my own also..especially "by" someone I did not genuinely know or love. It could have happened at a better time with a better person...but in the end i believe we will be blessed that it happened just the way it did! Later on, hopefully we will both find a wonderful man who is loving and accepting of us & our child--weeding out all the losers!


Nicole - July 9

It is hard to put your faith in men especially young men. I would just not count on his support. Have you ever thought about an open adoption where you are still apart of your babies life? We are in one of these and it is great! We would love to help you out. I am easygoing and a great listener. Please visit our adoption website and email me from there! http://www.adoptionprayer.com Good luck in your journey!


Amanda - July 12

Anna, Hi there Im 19 years old and 7 1/2 months preg. Up until 3 days ago my babys father was in the picture, I read this i saw my self in your story, i know exactally how you feel and i would love to help you and your boyfriend that way you two dont end up like my ex and i. It's very hard living with the fact your preg,and not having your babys dad around. If ya would like heres my email addy [email protected]


B - July 13

I feel you girls...I just moved out of my babys fathers yesterday and I fell lost. Everything was going fine and then out of the blue we had an awful fight...I dont know if he will ever be in our lives. Hang in there and know that u are not alone.


Sydney - July 14

I guess it's comforting to know that there are a lot of single moms out there! I seem to think that after a baby is born & the father sees it for himself, it would be hard for them to not be a part of its life. It can be disturbing b/c of the fact they are not there t/o our pregnancy-& then all about it 9 months later! Though my "ex" hasnt been in the picture *im 4 months* yet....& I dont forsee him to be, I still wonder if he will change his mind when he sees part of what he created. No body wants their child to not have a father figure. But if it works out that way for some of us, then so be it. Hopefully we will find a great guy shortly afterwards that will want to love & adopt the child as their own. I pray for this for all!


Ashley - July 17

Hey im 19 weeks pregnant and i know what your going through.My bf and i arent really together any longer b/c he has totally changed he used to be sweet and this perfect guy now hes never around.Im totally sad and stressed to the max.And in fact my situtations a little worse..im 20 year old, pregnant and i already have a 3 yr old son by my ex husband.i grew up way to fast.Im just super sad b/c i didnt wanna be alone again but im just trying to feel happy and makes things good for me and my son and soon to be baby.keep ur head up..things could be worse.


crystal - July 27

Same here but I pregnant by a guy who lives in CA. I mad as hell at my situation, my family don't say much and when they do we argue. His family is great, but they are not my family. Most guys at that age is all about their self at least he want to be a father, more than I can said my child father. Give time and he come around. This should be a great time in you life, but of course you going to hace your ups and down. email me at [email protected] Your are the first person who feels the same way I feel.


Kelly - July 27

Hello Ladies. I know exactly how most of you feel right now. When I turned 17 I became pregnant by a guy that I had been dating for a short time. Of course I thought I was in love with him. He ended up breaking up with me and leaving me when I was 3 months pregnant even though he said that he would always be there for the baby. I ended up having to leave school and move home to my parents in Vermont. ( I had been living with friends of the family in CT b/c Vermont was not appealing to me as a teenager). I went through my whole pregnancy without him or any of my friends. I was practically a shut in living in VT in the dead of winter. I was so depressed and thought that I would be forever. Now, I'll skip forward 12 years. I am now a happily married 29 year old with a beautiful 11 year old son. And even though me and his father never did end up together permanently we are the best of friends and my son is with him every weekend. We decided once we started to actually grow up that our feelings did not matter as much as though of our child. For our son's sake we knew we had to put the past behind us and the only way that I could do that was to finally fogive him for the pain of a broken heart. He is now married and has a daughter with his wife and we are all close friends. I just know that once you all are able to heal the wounds from your broken hearts and take time to think about the future you will realize that you are going to be okay and so will your children. Just be strong and keep those little babies best interest at heart and your lifes path will lead you to eventual happiness.


J. - July 28

I am 18 14 weeks pregnant and I also feel deprtessed. I've been with my boyfriend for 4years and I feel like he doesn't love me as much as I love him. He is also excited about me being pregnant but he's not suporting me as much as I would like him to. His family is very supportive and are excited about the baby and as for my fam- they are not so happy. My mom want's me to move out, yet I have no job and no money and no place to go. My boyfriend wont let me live with him. I wish I had some place to go. Iso unhappy at home I am even thinking about going to a shelter. So Anna I feel you girl. I need HELP! as well. I my mom and I do is fight. She said I shouldn't eat more then three meals a day yet I am still hungry and my boyfriends mom tells me to keep eating. I want to MOVE OUT!


to the 'we'll adopt it" - October 5

Look i dont know who you think you are but what i DO know is none of these ladies said they dont want to keep or were even CONSIDERING not keeping their babies, they are supporting eachother in their grief over their relationships situations. Havingbeen there when I got pregnant with my daughter 2 and a half years ago I am telling you what I would have told you if it were me you were trying to con out of my daughter -buzz off and leave anyone who hasnt brought up giving their baby up on their own ALONE!



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