Advice Please

3 Replies
Karen Duvall - November 15

How can I tell the babies dad I am pregnant again and make him believe me and how can I get money from him if he doesn't want anything to do with the kid or if he doesn't believe me he doesn't support the one he already has he doesn't even see her. I don't know if I am ready to be a mom yet either what should I do I love the baby already but I cannot give it the life it needs.


Jessica - November 15

First of all if the father doesnt believe you, show him the hpt! I, like you, was not ready to be a mom myself, I am 20 weeks pregnant and never thought I would have children. Now I am going to be a single mom at the age of 21. I find that over time im really getting used to the fact that a baby is going to come into my life and im getting more and more excited. The more I feel her kick and the more ultrasounds I see the more I love her and cant wait for her to get here. But motherhood is not for some people, and if you decide its not for you I would suggest adoption because there are so many good families out there that want children but just cant have them. If you decide to keep your baby, you will most likely have to get a paternity test done when the baby is born to prove he is the father and there should be child support agencies in your area. You cannot however, that I am aware of, start collecting money from him while you are pregnant.


Karen - November 16

thanks for the advice Jessica I will keep that in mind. I am only 22 we are a year apart and have the same feelings.


bmoebabe - November 16

I know how you feel I thought that I wasnt ready to be a mom both times I was 19 when I had my first but my bf was there even though I wasnt 100% positive that the baby was his he was still there. This time (I had my second last week) I told him he said he was scared then a week later he said he was ok with it and another week later he was gone I was only 6 weeks pregnant when he dissapeared I still havent heard from him. I just posted "so what do I do now?" if you want to know more abotu my current situation and my earlier situation is under "this is my story so be prepared..." if you want to read. As far as I know child suppot is the only thing that you can get from him and that doesnt start until the baby is born but you only get it if they actually pay or actually work so if the father works under the table tax free jobs that arent reported then you might run into some difficulty with actually getting the money that the court orders him to pay even though he will be responsible to pay you the full amount for the rest of his life even after the child is 18 if he is behind still at that point. Just remember that when you start showing it might be a reality check for him because he will visibly be able to tell that you are pregnant also you could offer to take a hpt in front of him the fact that he does have another child might be to your advantage if you are able to speak with the other mother to see how much he is ordered to pay and how often he actually pays. Good luck to you and I hope that the advice you are recieving is helping to make your decision easier. Remember too that if you are in need of financial a__sistance right now even though he is not obligated to help you there are social service organizations in each state to a__sist you financially and also to help you with medical insurance.



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