Do I Legally Have To Give My Baby His Father S Last Name

84 Replies
Mel - November 13

Nope, you can name the baby whatever you want. You can give s/he a last name that is even different from yours and the father's.

 

Jennifer..:) - November 14

hi,this will be my 4th baby. the poor little thing will be so confused if i give her/him her daddy's last name. he isnt with us. the other 3 all have the same last name , mine is different. After my divorce i changed it back to original name.. I wont be changing it again, even if i do marry one day.. wont it be more confusing to the baby and the schools etc. if there is yet another name in there..I am a little confused on this. I know i dont have to give baby his name but he wants it.I dont really care on way or the other, but prefer to have baby the same name as mine. the little baby is already going to be confused with no dad and the other three get to see their dad on alternating weekend..sheesh what a mess..Be easier on baby if he/she had my last name wouldnt it? help! father isnt part of my life. but he will be part of babies life...

 

Alisha - November 14

The whole principal of giving your child the fathers last name is outdated. The woman carries the child for 9 months and then suddenly she's suppose to give up her last name to the fathers? The term "feme covert" comes to mind. Men do not own women or children anymore. Since women own their own rights and their own children, children should always have the mothers name. I feel strongly about this. Tell the father to kiss your a__s, but that baby came out of YOUR belly.

 

lol - November 14

ahmen girl

 

erica - November 15

im positive you dont have to i have my moms last name,

 

lisa - November 20

i know here in the uk you can give the baby any name, but if your not married and give the child the fathers name it can never be changed, where as if your married and the child gets fathers name it can be changed in future, do not give your child his name, your carrying this baby and no doubt will be bringing it up so it should have your surname, if you chose to get back together with this guy later, the name could then be changed to his

 

tigersoulmate - August 25

I say *don't* give the baby the father's last name. Ego is not the only reason to leave the father out of it, as "bottom line" suggested. I agree the child should be considered, but seriously, if YOU are the one who will be dealing with the legalities of this child (enrollment in school, medical care, etc), then what name you give your baby should be determined by what YOU want, not the baby. I understand the baby has to live with the last name, but you are the one who has to enroll him, you are the responsible party. It's so much easier on YOU (and the baby in conjunction) if you're not kept at the front desk trying to explain to someone why your last names are different, or why the father isn't in the picture. It falls on you, so if you want to give it your last name, then so be it. If the father isn't around to help you handle this c___p and use HIS name, then he really doesn't deserve the right to have his name carried on (it's not like he cares, right?). And one last thing to think of.. You can give your baby the father's last name if you want.. by YOUR choosing.. but it's no guarantee that giving his child his surname is going to make him want to be around. SO when you determine what you want to do, don't think of ego. Don't think of revenge. But also.. don't think of his feelings. If he's there to tell you, use his name if you wish. If he's not, he's not caring what name you give it, period. Consider how it affects YOUR life, since you're the only party who can't walk away from the baby, and you'll be the one who has to deal with all of the legalities of that child's life.

 

Milan - September 4

Married or not married, you do not have to give your baby his last name, but make sure it is on the certificate..... it will help speed up the process for help.

 

Milan - September 4

jimbob, I am glad to hear that there are men that are willing to step up to the plate. You seem like a stand up guy. My boyfriend and I got pregnant (after 5 yrs.) and unexpectedly! His first reaction was joyful, until the next morning and the aliens poped out of his chest. He did a 360 called me a manipulative c..... Tried to kick me out of his house. He did not want anything to do with me started verbally attaching me and things started to esculate from there, if you know what I mean. Well, we seperated in different states. He is starting his business in LA and I am finishing my school in Austin. Let me add I am 36 he is 51 so there is quite an age difference. Well, he does give me child support now even though I am still pregnant. Let me also add that he supported me before I got pregnant when I was living with him (he preferred it this away). He does not want to go through the courts (he hates lawyers and it cost $) He was a bit of a controll freak too! We have agreed to give the baby my last name. He has agreed to give a substantial amount of $ (more than 600 a week) for child support. Mainly because he knows that I have no support system and no family at all! He has admitted to me that he can not take care of the baby while trying to start his business (he is not good in that department). But what really bothers me is that if something happens to me he said that HIS family would raise the baby, not him. Is this a red flag for him trying to get custody?

 

April - September 4

Lauren I hope you're at least getting child support out of that jerk. Even if you don't need it... put it in an account for when your baby turns 18. My ex FINALLY started visiting my daughter when she was 8 months old. He finally dumped the fiance and put our daughter first... good for him! There's still no way in hades I'll ever even CONSIDER getting back with him.. and I'm still glad that I gave her my last name. Don't regret that even the tiniest bit. Oh, and this thread is older than the hills... look at the date on the first reply... it's almost 2 years old.. haha

 

lauren - September 10

April, LOL, I never noticed how old this thred was!!! I'm not getting child support, and I could really use it!! We go to court on the 2 of October and i'm sooo nervous! I havn't seen him in over 8 months and I had hoped to never see him again. He needs to pay child support, I didn't climb on top of my self and get pregnant, and I shouldn't have to suppot my daughter finacially on my own( but I'm jut fine with doing all the parenting on my own)!

 

brit-brit - December 6

i need sort of the same help..I have raised my son by myself..he is a yr. old..and as soon as i filed for child-support his biological father requested my son to have his last name..even though he was never there...and the attorney general of texas chnaged my sons last name and added the father to the birth certificate and told me he has a right to do that..i need to know if i can fight that and keep my sons last name...or is it even worth fighting for?

 

ScorpioEmpress - December 13

Nope. My first kid was named with my maiden name because my first husband and I were not even together at the time. We got married after he found out he had a child by me. My next kid would have his name because we were married (but you still don't have to name a kid after the sperm donor) but I also gave my second MY name first followed by a hyphen then HIS last name. My two daughters both go by my maiden name now because he disappeared with a terminal leave and has never paid child support in the 15 years since. My last three also have my maiden name as the first half of their hyphenated name. Why should the sperm donor claim familial ownership rights?

 

dawnie83501 - December 15

If he wants to be a part of the baby's life, there is always the option of a hyphenated surname. Legally, he should be on the certificate of course, but surname is your choice.

 

kay101 - December 15

NO and NO! My daughter does not have her father's last name. She has mine and rightfully so. As far as the birth certificate goes, I would have him sign it. It's good for the baby even if you don't like him to be able to see his name and yours on there and it will also make things easier for you. If you go to court for anything child support, custody it saves you a step. If his name isn't on there the court will order a paternity test and it will slow up the process.

 

expectingapreciousbabyboy - December 25

Ok, I am in Virgina so I dont know how diff. the laws are but...by no means do you have to give your baby the daddy's name and as far as him not wanting to sign over rights to you.. if he is not on the birth certificate he has no leagal rights to your child until he pays for a DNA test! I hope all goes well. Let me know!

 

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