Emotionally Abusive

2 Replies
SLP - February 26

I am 8 weeks pregnant and ever since my bf found out he has barely spoken to me. He usually calls once a day and we fight for about five minutes and then that's it. He turns everything around on me. He hasn't seen the ultrasound pictures, he will never talk about the pregnancy or even ask how I'm doing, although he claims that he doesn't want to leave like his dad did. Today I called him and I asked him what he's thinking and what he's feeling and he said he was freaking out and that his life is going to shit. I told him that he should take some time to think about what he wants and call me in a few days, weeks, whatever. I said that having him around the way he is is stressing me out and I need some time apart. He accused me of saying this so that I can call my exboyfriend to come around. Of course that hurt, my ex is my very best friend, but that is it. It seems like everything he says is a way to hurt me, like he's trying to "get back at me" because I'm pregnant or something. I don't want him around because I don't care about him after the way he's been this month and if it weren't for the baby I would have broken up with him before. What should I do? (*Sorry it's so choppy, I'm very scattered right now*)


jg - February 26

If you were going to break up with your boyfriend before you found out you were pregnant, and are only staying with him because of it, it really isn't a great reason to stay in a relationship. I firmly believe that children need both a mum and dad, but they need parents who love each other, anything less is bound to be a bad situation for them. You deserve someone who loves you and your baby, and your boyfriend deserves the same. If I was a child I would not want to be responsible for being the reason my parents stayed together even though they were really unhappy. Good luck SLP, I hope you can find happiness.


April - February 27

It doesn't sound to me like you have a very healthy relationship with this guy. I agree with the last poster that you should not stay together just because of the baby. Ideally, it's great for a baby to have a mother and father that are together, but it's okay if it doesn't work out that way. What's best for your baby, is to be in a healthy stable environment. Your baby NEEDS you to be happy. If you're not happy, the baby's going to sense it and then he/she won't be truly happy either. Also, with him saying he doesn't want to leave like his dad did... well this doesn't mean that he can't be in the baby's life.. it just means he won't be in the same house. Plus, the fact that you wanted to break up with him before you got pregnant means that something wasn't working... it's only going to get worse when the baby gets here. I think you should just do what your heart is telling you to do and separate from this guy. I really think it sounds like that's what's best for all of you.. including the baby.



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