My Violent Boyfriend

40 Replies
stephanie - September 1

i live in the uk, im seventeen and ive been with my boyfriend for a year and a half, i really love him but one day about six months ago he hit me because i went out with my best girlfriend & we bumped into some guys from college and somebody saw us & told him i was having an affair (not true). since then i tried to bring up the courage to leave him because i know he wont change (he's hit me on several occasions since- broken a couple of ribs and cracked my head) but i love him so much. and now i am four months pregnant with his baby and he says he wants to get married and bring up the child together but im scared for my baby. i dont see any way out except to have an abortion, as he wont let me leave him, he says he will come after me, but i dont want to bring up a child with him! I dont want to kill my little unborn baby either. please please help me.


Edie - July 27

You cannot stay with a man who is abusive. If you do love him, then suggest that he gets counseling but DO NOT stay with him. Even if you won't leave for yourself, think of the fact that he could harm your baby. Also, make sure you get some prenatal care. See a doctor. It may be too late for you to have an abortion and it doesn't sound like you want to have one. It sounds more like you are afraid. A doctor can refer you to a good counseling center or women's shelter if you don't have a place to go. Please take care of yourself and your baby, don't stay with him and don't let his threats scare you. You can do it!


Anon - July 27

Do NOT stay with that guy. He broke some ribs, and cracked your head?!?! Think of what he could do to the baby. The baby is the most important thing right now. Just dont let this guy hurt your baby.


melissa - July 27

take it from some one who grew up in an abusive home please leave him. My mother chose to stay with my step-father even tho he hit me and her. when my brother was born he nearly killed him by throwing him down the stairs at 1and ahalf. he won't change and u and ur unborn child could end up dead. It took my step-father putting a gu7n to both mine and my mother's head before she left him don't let that be u.


brucen - July 28

The people are right--GET OUT NOW! Here is a link that might help. Cut and paste this into the address bar:


whitney - August 10

s_xy beast


Annette - August 11

S_xy beast? Try just BEAST! Do not stay with him. I grew up in a home where my father hit my mother. When she finally left him years later, she got into another relationship and remarried, he hit her too. They both hit me. I have also worked with children who are diabled, several due to being abused by parents. You don't want this for your child. Leave now. I know you love him, but does he love you the same? If he really loved you the same, he wouldn't hit you.


Hypnotiq - August 14

He will try and verbally abuse you about your choice of abortion...But, that is your choice...If it comes to the point where you feel like you are in danger of your life, or your child's life, that is not safe...You should report him, get a court order keeping him away, get protection or something, but Run!!! If you chose to keep this child, please get away from that, because pregnancy is a very emotionally difficult time....No stress needed...Can't say the same for my situation but I'm trying to get there with you...


m - August 16

honey you don't need a man to have a child it can be done and it is far to late to have an abortion at four months so I would throw that optio out the window because that is just so wrong think about your unborn child and quit being selfish. You need to just focus on getting through the pregnancy and having the child first and dump that loser. He is just threatening you I would tell him to go to hell go stay with a relative or somebody that will protect you from him and don't have any contact with him what so ever.. good luck


To Stephanie - August 30

You really need to step back and see this situation that you are in. A person that bashes you to the point your ribs break does not love you. I am sorry but love is not expressed that way. Get out now, you marry this guy and it will be the biggest mistake of your life. The sad thing is guys like this don't change, as much as we want them to, we have to do the right thing for us and just walk away.


tracy - September 1

Please listen to what i am going to say as i have went through it aswell at 17 you must feel there no way out but they are this man is abusing you not just by hitting you b ut by mentally abuse aswell which is alot worse brusing goes away but by him saying he will come after you he is playing with your head now this is started he will be controling i wasnt aloud to see my family if i was i had a time limit your so young please get help either from family,freinds and police they are there to help you once your baby arrives dont think it will get any better as it will not my ex seriously a__sulted my son at 6monts thats when i had the courage to leave him even when he told me he would come looking for me stay in contact if you would like to talk.


Tere - September 13

I am seventeen and and 7months pregnant. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and I know exactly how you feel. I know that it is really hard when you have been with someone and you love them so much, but all they do is hurt you. Yet if he really loves you and the baby he wouldn't hurt you. Plus now you can't just think about yourself, you have to think about the baby also. I know it isn't easy to be a single mom at seventeen, but sometimes you gotta take responsibility and do what is right, and letting him hurt you is definitely not the right way to have a relationship. Just be strong and know that you are not alone. There are so many places you can go for help...also you may think abortion is the answer, but this baby is innocent, don't do it just because you feel there is no way out. Please just know there are so many alternatives.


kerry - September 20

Hi stephanie Let me say first WELLDONE and that you have made the most important move bye talking out in the open about what your going trough, this you should be proud of. i am now 26 at 17 i was pregnant to like you and with a boyfriend that did not care for me or my baby, my son was 6 months old when things went wrong, It was only one simple slap (At First) so it starts and you dont know where it comes from or why, or what you did wrong.( Not ) that you have to do anything wrong to have a bully take over your life, Your minds working over time and you fell alone, Your Not Please for your life and the one you have growing in you try and see how he is with you, he is in a good fram of mind one min and the next he is pulling you up of the floor saying Sorry i want do it again, and the funny thing is we think its ok becuse he said sorry give him a huge back and all is ok. ................. Untill the next time You have a chance to change the way your life gose, dont let it be his way of life.... there is no he well change, it well get better. You have to make sure you and your baby are safe. this in sort is what happend to me At the end of a 3 week bullying spree i had a broken arm three borken ribs and my son was tuck into care i still suffer today all i can say is Help yourself and others well guide you the rightway these might help If you would like to speak more then leave me a message i hope you can come to the right choice take care


ALL I CAN SAY IS.... - September 28



Scarlette - October 17

what you might consider is going to the police and explaining your situation, ask them to a__sign some kind of detective to watch your back for a few months, leave him and get a restraining order on him. usually police will help if it is a situation that could cause injury to you or your baby


Ca__saundra - January 25

hey hun, u dont have to abord the baby but you have to leave him. you can prove that he is unfit to be the father of the baby and he wont be able to have contact with you or the baby without you permition or the permition of a judge


Oh My Goodness Stephanie!! - January 26

First of all let me say that I am so sorry that you are going through such hell! I know that it is easier said than done but you need to get away from him right away. I know a little about what you are going thru. I was with a guy for 9 years and all of a sudden he starts calling me names...that lead to pushing me around and the next move was him beating the hell out of me. He almost broke my dang jaw! After that nite I took a protective order out on his a__s and we have went to court where he was ordered to stay away. When he didn't he went to jail. Luckily we did not have any babies together. I am not sure how things are handled where you live but I would only hope that there is some kind of law that protects you against this violence or some kind of help center that you can turn to. Please don't abort your baby. That is not what you want. You must find a way to get away from him. If he truely loved you he would never raise a hand to you and believe me they don't change!



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