Paternity Testing And What Comes After

3 Replies
Aishah - November 9

Well I had my son 8 weeks ago and finally today is the day where we go to take the bucal test. Thats the one where cheek cells are taken with the swab. Me and baby are being done today and he was done yesterday. Ours was a lil unusual because Im in Illinois and hes in NYC but for all the ladies that arent in NYC and have babys daddys there or vice versa..theres a place where you can do a legal DNA test for $130. Thats what we are doing. I know the baby is his. the baby looks like him but also he was the onky cat that i messed with at that time and after. Hes is the only cat thatI had s_x with without a condom and hes the only cat that let his shit off inside me(sorry to be vulgar)/ I guess Im lucky because he wanted to do the test but it doesnt make it easy for me. I have spent 11 months doing this alone. A few weeks ago his mother called me..she wants to be the babys life and she wants us to move up there to NYC so she can be around the baby and initially i felt ok about it but now..i eel very cold because i think they think that once they know its all over but I dont feel this way. i feel like ok now you know what they think im going to be happy? My baby is sleeping behind me and he looks trhe spit of his daddy. That cat put me thru some shit for a test that is not needed because he needed to be sure. He wont even talk tome till its done...i mean wtf...he wont talk tome now..why does he think we are gong to talk after. I wonder what happens after this. My friends tell me its gonna stay hard for some years..Im 31.I cant be fightng with noone for that kinda time. Im tired of this shit. This drama. Im tired of this test. Im tired of it all and I wish I never had that cats child. I love my nene but I hate the fact that his father is who he is. Dayyum :(


barb - November 23

You are NOT alone. My babys daddy is the same way. I'm three weeks away from giving birth and that SOB is NOWHERE to be found. The last time I saw him , which was last month, was when he popped the paternity test question. I was like, WTF??? Again, he was the ONLY one I had s_x with, the ONLY man I've had unprotected s_x with in years, and the ONLY man who unloaded inside of me (oh, thanks so much). He KNEW that I wasn't on the pill. I swear. I think these men just want to know that another person is walking around with their DNA. Is your man on drugs, cause mine is all messed up on b__w, he's a loser, and he doesn't have any intention of being in my daughters life once he gets his 'proof'. Also, what kind of ho does he make me out of be? like i was just sleeping around with hundreds of men ?? whatever.


barb - November 23

I have NO idea what comes after this. I have no idea what he wants to do with his proof. I suppose he'll feel more like a 'man' knowing that the baby is officially his.


Aisha - November 25

Hi barn..well the results came back. He got the results last Friday. I didnt get anything but they proved that he was the father with NO doubt. His mom called me on sunday asking if she could see the baby and Im going to take the baby up to nyc so he can meet his family. My babys daddy spoke to me today..he didnt apologize for anything..he said he wanted to see the baby and asked a lot of questions about what he was doing, his personality etc. Its funny because the he was shocked that the baby looked so hispanic considering that im black but thats the way that it works at times. I decided to be easy. After all is said and done nothing can bring back what i missed and nothing can give back how i felt being pregnant with his son and giving birth alone but its too tiring to hate him so for the sake of my being peaceful....Ill update



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