Pregnant And Lonely

7 Replies
scarednlonely - April 30

I'm 25 and have a 4 year old daughter. I met a guy who was great to my daughter and be loved her so much he decided he wanted his own. We were due to get married 7 days ago but he left me 2 days before the wedding. I have no support and no friends and my family don't want help me. I still live with my ex and he gas become very abusive and I'm about to become homeless. I never wanted this for my children and would not have got pregnant if I knew him for who he is today. I feel bad that I put my daughter in this situation and I have done everything to try find a new home for me and my daughter to go to. I am 4 months pregnant and he wants me to give custody of my baby to him. Over my dead body. Help please


Grandpa Viv - May 1

HUGS! Who wants custody, the ex or the father? I wonder if there is a Spouse Abuse Shelter anywhere near you. I think you would qualify. An alternative would be a BirthRight Shelter. You were in an odd position, still living with and probably supported some by your ex while engaged to another man. Do you have any job skills? One thing you might hope for is that the fiance irrationally got cold feet, and if you give him time he will realize that he really does want to be with you. Try to keep the relationship friendly, even though you are deeply hurt. If you can persuade him to be present at the birth, he will bond to both you and the baby. Keep talking to us!


scarednlonely - May 1

sorry I probably didn't make it very clear. My ex is my ex fiancé I don't have much to do with my daughters father now cause my fiancé would not let me send my daughter over he isolated me. I was working for 6 years with a company and just recently quit cause this pregnancy has not been the best I have been in hospital the last week and they fear I'm losing the baby and that the baby is sick yet my ex fiancé who I live with who I was meant to marry a week ago the father of my unborn child doesn't care he is not here for the baby. I am starting to realize he is weak and he has given up his wife and child. He wants custody of my unborn child yet he is not here when it's life is in danger.


Grandpa Viv - May 1

That picture makes a bit more sense. You were having a problem pregnancy and quit your job. He called off the wedding, and you ended up in hospital with a pregnancy crisis. Now you are back home, but he is being abusive and wants you out of there! Wow! Do you think that the problems of the pregnancy and your job loss had anything to do with his change of heart? Do you think you were conned into getting pregnant so that he can have the child he wants, without the responsibility of marriage? You early described him as being controlling, not a good marriage partner. Maybe you and your children will be better off without him, even though some difficult times are ahead. GL!


scarednlonely - May 1

Yeah that's the story line. He made me quit my job so it can't be that. I don't know maybe he used me for a baby!


Grandpa Viv - May 2

This is a guy who did not feel loved by his parents. His mother was not there for him when he needed her, and he learned all sorts of manipulative tricks to keep her in sight. He got on great with your daughter because she made him feel loved. He made you quit your job and cut off contact with the father of your daughter in order to control you better. Even then, he is so insecure that he doubts his ability to control you long term, so he has shied away from marriage. Now his only hope of finding love is to have a child whose love he can direct with no interference. You have some personal work to do to figure out what attracted you to a guy with these characteristics in the first place, or the next guy will turn out the same. Did your daughter's father fit the same mold? Good luck! You are welcome to chat.


scarednlonely - May 4

Yes he was very similar. I have a very strong personality which I don't think guys like. I stand up for what I believe in and I stand up for myself. I always find the mummys boys which doesn't help.


pregnant_single - August 13

If you are single and pregnant, you don't have to be! Check out my profile for Facebook page information on finding a man that will love and adore you during and after your pregnancy, or search 'pregnant and single' in Facebook. I have even established a Yahoo group called 'PREGNANTNSINGLENLA' to put single pregnant women together with men who possess a strong s_xual fetish for pregnant woman. So, if you're still pregnant and single, that is purely your choice as you don't have to be.



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