Pregnant By A Liar

3 Replies
tired of BS - September 17

I've been in an on/off relationship with my baby's father for 6 years and I'm 6 months pregnant. The day I found out I was pregnant I asked him if he would be there for me and the baby and he said yes. Soon after I found out (not by him) that he was involved in another relationship. I made it very clear from the start that I didn't want to have a baby by him if he wasn't going to be around to support the baby and me through the pregnancy, but he convinced me that he would. Since then he has told his girlfriend and she stayed with him. Now he acts as if she is a saint because she stuck around and I'm just a crazy pregnant lady. He won't tell me anything about his plans for the future of the baby or us and it's too late for me to change my mind. I feel like I was trapped. Adoption isn't an option for me but I don't want to be stuck with this coward forever, nor do I want my son (it's a boy!) to be like him. He comes in and out of my life when he pleases and I let him (for now) because I don't want to be alone, but he has made it clear that things will be on his terms now and his girlfriend comes first. I feel like my worst nightmare has come true and I have no way out. I know I need to put my feelings for him aside and think about my baby, but I'm not sure if he'll help or make the situation worse. I fell on the stairs today and have been put on bedrest until my next doctors appointment. I have nobody to help me right now and am becoming very angry at him for not caring. I don't feel like he deserves my baby if he's only going to come around when things are good, then leave me to deal with the difficult times. it's not fair! Am I being selfish?


PJ - September 17

No, it sounds like you are starting to realize your true situation. He already stated his girlfriend comes first - before who? You? Your baby/his son? F$#% him - although it's no fun to go through this alone - it is much better to do so then to have this lunatic treat you like a second cla__s citizen. At this point you need to plan your life without him. Period. Plan your baby's life without him as well. That baby should come first not only in your life, but his as well... Until he says or proves otherwise - you know where he stands. Drop him like a hot potato, sweetie.


IKNOW - September 18

I hope your not still sleeping with him. God knows what type of infection he can pa__s on to you, or even worse your baby...Trust me it does happen, I was on and off with my xboyfriend while pregnant, I miscarried and a month later found out I had herpes. (Imagine if my baby would have been born with that? I wouldn't live with the guilt) He feels free to come and go as he pleases because you allow him to. I know being lonely is so hard when you are pregnant, but if he's not serious then you should get used to the idea of him not being with you. See him, less and less, don't return his calls, it takes time but you'll get on well. You have your whole life ahead with this baby and you wont be the first nor the last single mom to make it. If by then he decides to change, then use your better judgement. It is not fair for you to stress over him during your pregnancy, and allow him to hurt you. What are you getting out of this? Is it worth it for him to have his cake and eat it to? Stand up for yourself and surround yourself with family and friends who value you. Best of Luck, and God Bless.


Jill - September 26

Pitch him! Don't do it gradually. Just dump his A$$. I give it 6 months before the gf is pregnant too...and who knows how many others he's seeing. He's a dog. Get a lawyer, get him to sign over parental rights, and get as far away from him as possible. Your baby will be better for it and so will you.



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