Unsure And Depressed

2 Replies
Baby2418 - November 1

I am Tara and I am 23 years old. I am about 5-6 weeks pregnant. I have not had my first prenatal appt. It is scheduled for 11/8/07. I will find out then how far along I am at that point. My boyfriend says he does not want this child because we are not financially ready and I have not met his mom and he does not want to introduce me to her under these circ_mstances. We live in TX and she lives in NYC. He has met my family. I have spoken with his mother over the phone. I believe that God put this task in front of us for a reason and he just wants me to get an abortion no questions asked. He says we will be unable to provide properly for the baby etc. and that love is not the only thing a child needs. I am willing to get a part time job up until 8 months in order to save some money and better provide for my child. I am so torn and unsure of what to do. Do I have a good enough reason to just terminate my pregnancy or will I have to be a single mom if he decides not to stick around. He already has two boys 8 and 10 from a previous relationship. I just have no idea what to do and how I could even be considering abortion. It is something that I only believe in under extenuating circ_mstances. This is really not one of them. I am verrry sad and depressed. I know I will be in a lot of pain emotionally and physically. Please help sway me in the right direction.


docbytch - November 1

Hey there. I read your post on meredyths thread too. If you read my response on her thread you will see that it applies to you as well. If you are the least bit torn about termination of the pregnancy...to do so would only haunt you for the rest of your life. I have terminated a pregnancy before...but I was very certain that it was the right decision. It did not make the decision "easy" for undergoing the procedure is...depressing and not fun in the least. BUT my certainty at the time stayed with me and I later can say I don't feel haunted by it. It was a sucky situation with a sucky solution...but what's done is done now and my dd was better off for it (I was a single, struggling mom of a 3 yo at the time). My dd's needs were more relevant to me than the theoretical idea of another child to feed (which would have been next to impossible). It's obvious by reading your post that you don't really wish to terminate your pregnancy...and so...with that said along with the rest of this spiel...I would recommend you not doing so. However....as I said to meredyth...only YOU know where your heart is. Follow it...and don't let anyone sway you from your own convictions...whatever they are. Good luck to you!


tish212 - November 2

docbytch is right (she usually is) :) if u have ANY doubts...then don't do it! it will haunt u forever...ur baby doesn't need every toy under the sun...and the number 1 thing a child needs is love....trust me I was on the other end growing up my parents had unlimited $$ and I got EVERYTHING I wanted...by 17 I already had had 7 cars and wrecked most of them..but I had a noncaring alcoholic mother and a never there father...my teen years were messed up...drugs alcohol...promiscuity etc... I would trade everything I was given to have the loving mother ya know the one when u grow up becomes ur best friend....u can offer that life to ur baby.... and u r committed enough to offer to get a job which shows u have devotion developed already to this child...it is not fair that he gives u an ultimatum either abort or lose him? I'd rather be a single mom then be stuck with someone who can't see a gift from god. if he does leave u..u can get support...there is wic...daycare vouchers etc.... and u already show caring for this baby...keep it...god gave u this blessing for a reason... hugs...and trust me when u go to ur sonogram and see that little one on the screen perfectly content in ur belly...ull know u can't...even though on the first u/s it looks like a grain of rice...ull love it instantly...trust me ..u show u have a big heart by how u wrote....hugs.... :) u can make it trust me!



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