What To Do Advice

4 Replies
confused - May 12

what do u do when ur so called b/f ignores you because u tell him your preg, and then u find out he is w/ someone else! i am feeling real hurt and wondering if i should keep the baby? i don't know if i want to be a single parent, and if i do keep should i loose complete contact. he asked me not to cb and we have not spoke. whats the deal? i am real confused on waht to do, should i just abort and have a real man that will care and luv for me and my child?


Ysabel - May 13

I went through what you're going through now. In fact, i'm still going through it. I decided to keep the baby and my baby's due in a month's time. My whole experience so far, has definitely made me become nothing else but a better adn stronger person. With or without my ex, i knew that if i went through the abortion, i would have turned to drugs and do god know's what by now. I still go through depression from time to time, it's expected. especially that we're young single and pregnant, but knowing that all my sadness will soon be altered when i can finally hold this baby in my arms. S is right, the decision should not be anyone else's decision but yours. but remember, YOU SHOULD NEVER do the right thing for the wrong reason. Do the right thing because you believe YOU can do it. Don't decide to keep the baby because "he" wants the baby this time. I have never learned so much from my experience. You realize who your true friends are, how much love your family has for you, and that you are stronger than you think. It has been an experience that has forced me to change, but what i'm proud of the most is that i am left without regret. Whatever choice you decide, do it for you, and no one else, especially not for an immature selfcentered boy. In the end, what matters most is that you respect yourself.


cinfused - May 13

thank you for ur advice, although i am still confused ? because the guy does not want mr to keep the baby and i don't think my family is going to be very happy about me being preg. i want to keep the baby i am just scared and i think my fear and my ex and my family r making think the right thing would be an abortion.


April - May 13

You sound like me. As soon as my live-in boyfriend found out I was pregnant he started ignoring me. He'd wake up before I would and go to his parents and then not come home until 11 or midnight. He was completely avoiding me. We ended up breaking up, and then 2 weeks later he had a new girlfriend. I'm sure he was seeing her when he was with me. You should not abort. I think that if you even have to ask that question then you shouldn't do it because you will probably regret it. You will do great as a single mom I'm sure and there are PLENTY of government programs out there to help women like us. I also think of this baby as a blessing because she will weed out all the jerks I would've gone out with in the future and direct me toward a loving, caring guy, who will love my baby as if she was his own, and also love me. Keep this baby and stick the father with child support.


April - May 13

I also have to say... that I was scared about what my family would say too. As far as I knew my mom still thought I was a virgin, and I liked it that way. Well... with me being pregnant that thought would fly right out the window. I thought she was going to yell and lecture when she found out but she didn't at all. She was sooooooooooooooooooooo happy! She just kept hugging me and telling me how excited she was to be a grandma. I told her I was scared she'd be mad and she said "no! babies are blessings! and it's not like you can take it back.. i'm just happy you're keeping it!" I had waited 3 months to tell her, and I would've told her sooner if I would've known she was going to react that way. Everyone has been SO supportive of me since. It's great and I'm soooo happy. Even if your parents are shocked and don't react this way at first, they will love that baby. Most likely, the shock will wear off, and they will be happy to be grandparents. Oh.. and there have been so many people that have told me that they are proud that I've kept it because so many people get abortions. I was on vacation in florida talking to a woman in the pool, and I had mentioned the father leaving and she just kept saying how awesome it was that I kept the baby. It made me feel so good.



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