Why Do Men End Relationships When Gf Falls Preg

1 Replies
kiss123 - November 26

hi guys! tonight i came across this website and i registered becoz i am very much alone. i have no family support or any from the bf i had of 2 and half years relatiosnhip with. He has dumped me. I use to always cook 4 him, clean 4 him, do all nice things, eachtime ive needed him he's never bin ther for me and nw im preg he's left me to deal with it all alone. i am very depressed and feel so shitty about myself. I am a univerisity student so is he. But he also blames me for messing up his uni in the past. Nw he dnt even see me but lastwk wen i spoke to him he sed he's always angry with me coz he wont be able to complete uni and ive told him tht he cud continue and jus get a p/t job on the side. But he sayn 'no' im gona get a full-time job and be there for wen the bby is born. i dnt knw whether i shud trust him coz he says a lot of things. he aint ther for me nw and its very rare i see him and were both in the same city n same uni but he doesnt evn call to see how i am. he's got a new mobile phone and hasnt even given me the number. i seriously dnt knw wat his game is. Nw is the time for him to be workin hard at uni but he's always out clubbin. wen i was with him he wud say he dnt like clubbing and he actually ignored me for over a month and i found out where he was working so i went round to his workplace to see why he has ignored me for so long and if he has sum1 else in his life now. on a 4 ocassion i have waited for him outside his workplace to sort things out, infront of his boss he is really nice to me and when he comes out of work and says his farewells he's awfully nasty and makes me all tearful. i have kept calm and just cried infront of him and he dont care. he has sed he doesnt care coz i have ruined his life and i have sed to him i made the choice to keep the baby coz i cannot bare to abort. and i have told him he has the option to leave me to deal with the baby alone. as i dnt want an awful dad for my baby, sum1 whose there once in a moon light. gals tell me wat to do? i am hurtin over and over agen and also how can i get him to tell me if he is seeing sum1 else coz if he is i certainly do not want anythn to do with him and i want him to leave me with the baby wen it born and never to meddle in my life. he has also spat in my face in the past and called me a 'whore' only to hurt me. he knws im against ppl who mess/sleep around and cheat on their partners. so i think maybe he is jus havin a power trip over the whole situation and knws tht im all alone and dnt even have one fam member to share my concerns with. please help me. i dnt knw if any of u gals out there have serious probs or jus put anythn on this site. But i am seriously going thru this non sense and i dunno if i shud try chattin to him one more time. i dnt wana appear asthgh im chasing him which is wat i am not doin but wantin to knw why and how long he's gona continue being awful to me becoz i cannot take it no more. i wudnt mind chattin to any of ur on 'msn' it mite even be easier than havin to log on and off this site coz everyone goes on msn.

 

WeeJulz - December 30

i went through a situation almost exactly the same, he said I had ruined his chances at uni and all his life plans. but strangely he kept coming round to my house and we acted as tho we were a couple every other week.Since then he has told me to stop saying that I love him which really was the cherry on top of the cake. It was then I knew to just let it go. I'll give you a piece of advice my mum gave to me. She had me at age 16 and my biological father left, ive never met him. But my mum is now married with 3 other children and I call her husband dad because he was the one who raised me. My mum told me that yes, it is hard when your alone but the sooner you sort yourself out and get over him the sooner u can look forward to having another man. Her exact words were you find a better quality of a man when you have a child. Think about it, when u do meet someone and they are willing to take you on with the baby too and help you out, it not only is gonna make you so happy but its far better than emotionally straining yourself and hanging onto something with your ex that just might not happen again. Personally I'm still holding out for my ex to come back to me, but at the same time Ive come to terms with it if he doesn't. If your man has been sayin he will get a full time job etc let him get on with that. You never know his att_tude might change once his little baby is put into his arms for the first time. but dont hang onto that hope either, thats what messed me up when me n my man brokeup. If things cant be civil between you guys at the minute, let him cool off, let him go off with this other person and get it out of his system. cos at the end of the day he's gonna be a father and you have the legal system to back you up with that so you know that one day he will have to wise up no matter what you have said you want from him. the legal system will make sure he does what is 'legally' required from a biological father. focus on you, let him go. have a night out on the town dancing with girlfriends to get you out of the house, get your hair done, pamper yourself- youre pregnant you deserve it!!!

 

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