I Think My 2nd Son Has Autism

9 Replies
DownbutnotOUT - July 6

I am not ashamed what-so-ever to post here and I think this scetion is a great idea. Well to start off my son has exhibited many signs of autism and I am ashamed to admit I have not taken him to see a pediatrician earlier, he just turned 4 in June, but where I live I have to see a dr to refer me and all the drs I see say "give it time." He barely speaks, throws unbelievable fits, can fix things me and DH cant fix, goes off into himself and we have trouble getting his attention. i was in the hospital one day with him and the lady next to me acutally asked me if he had autism and went on to explain she was a child psycologist and noticed he had some of the signs. While sure enough he will be seeing a pediatrician right quick but was wondering if there is anyone out there that can offer me some advice on how to help me understand him better. I get so frustrated with him at times and than feel so guilty if I get mad at him and raise my voice. I had many people and a nurse ask me if my 1st had autism because he was speech delayed, he was given a clean bill of health except for speech delayment, so that also made me not push seeing a pediatrician. Now though I know something is not right and I want him to have the best life I can give and I hope someone can help me it would be very very much appreciated. thank you


sahmof3 - July 6

Hey DBNO... just from what you describe I totally think it would warrant an evaluation from a child psychologist or developmental specialist! My Nathan has all of what you described. He was just diagnosed with Asperger's (high-functioning autism) in April by the school psychologist (he was in kindergarten). I was like you... went to the ped and they just kept putting me off with, "It CAN be normal at this age, just give it time, etc." Well, it's hard to because these kids can be so high-functioning that they can fool you into thinking all's well sometimes (on a good day), but then their behavior and mannerisms can be so alarming at times and it feels like they need immediate help! Before kindergarten started last fall Nathan reverted to pooping and peeing his pants. We were very alarmed and called his med who just said wait and see how he handles school and see if his teacher notices anything. So... we waited. He adjusted fairly well to school, BUT his teacher noticed that something was up right away (and without me telling her... I had never mentioned it because I didn't want them LOOKING for something that may not be there, if that makes sense... in other words, I didn't want to put the idea into their head and have them follow that path to diagnosis, when it might really be something else. Aw, dang it lol I know what I'm trying to say, but I think I'm being kind of unclear LOL. Anyway, I do think that your son should be evaluated and I hope you can get that referral that you need. There are other ways to get free help. Do you have any Intermediate Units near you? They will do free evaluations w/out referrals and they can help you in getting an IEP (I think that stands for Individual Education Plan) for when he goes to school if he should require extra/special services. Nathan had a different type of evaluation from them when he needed speech therapy (he made up his own language at 14 months, used it for a few months and then abandoned it for total silence until 3 1/2... then his speech came immediately in sentences, but he had trouble with anunciation, which is where the speech therapy came into play). Anyway, the evaluation they did was more intellectual (ie: identifying letters, numbers, creating patterns, etc.).... which he is excellent at, but it didn't address things such as hand-flapping, watching and imitating repet_tive things (like the washing machine) for hours on end, his lack of eye contact and social skills, etc. But, at that point they weren't looking specifically for autism. This time (at my appt this summer) they will be. Iwill also be taking him to a developmental pysch, but it takes over 6 months to get an appt. Well, this is probably getting long, but feel free to ask me anything, anytime that you wold like to know about Nathan. Do you find that your 2nd son is more work than your other ones combined? That's how it seems to me... Nathan is 7... the other two are 3 and 2 and I feel that it is easier with two toddlers (and if they each had a twin!) than it is with just Nathan!!


sahmof3 - July 6

Oh... I'm in a group on cafemom DOT com that is very helpful. It's w w w DOT cafemom DOT com / groups / autismspectrum (of course, take out spaces and add real dots). I'm SahmTam on there is you should decide to join. I'm pretty new to the diagnosis and it's kind of overwhelming, but there's some good info on there.


DownbutnotOUT - July 8

Thank you so much for your information. I forgot to mention he is now peeing on the carpet and in the garbage can in there bathroom. he is definatly the hardest one of the bunch I would say my 5, 2 and newborn all rolled into one! He can be a very sweet boy and than at times be very mean and vandictive. When he watches curious george he than becomes curious boy 9as we call it) he will walk like george, climb like george, and get into heaps of trouble like george. i am going to take him with me to see my new family dr tomorrow and see whats up. he turned 4 on June 11th and still cant talk very well more like "yes,no,jeu "juice" and random words..my 2 year olds vocabulary b__ws him out of the water to say the least. I will try the new site and once again thank you so much :)


mojolucas - July 18

I am a special needs teacher and do work with children who have autsim. Try using picture symbols with him as a form a communciation for both you and your son. Use pictures of a toilet to indicate the need for urinating. Some children work well with cartoon pictures while other children need real photos. Set up a simple visual chart / schedulefor him that demonstate your expectaions. Such As ....FIRST bathroom (with a piture of the toilet) NEXT wash hands (picture of hands being washed) LAST (a picture of a desireable item you son likes). Start simple and if it he takes well to the system you can add more. Look into the TEACCH method with is developed to meet the needs of austistic children. It is what I use in my cla__sroom with both my austistic student as well as my student with Down syndrome.


mojolucas - July 19

please pardon my typos


tryingx3 - July 27

mojolucas - thank you for the ideas - I have pa__sed this on to my SIL who has a new son with Downs - maybe we can store that idea for when he gets bigger!


mojolucas - September 20

We use pictures schdeules with our toddler cla__ses too. The use of pictures are a great way for the kiddos to communicate without frustration. I have personally found sign laguage to work best with my kiddos who have downs sydrome and picture for my students who have autism. Sign language is as visual and may be to abstract for a child with autism who are usually visual learners.


DownbutnotOUT - December 14

mojolucas- Thanks for the great ideas and I have started using them and he i doing well but its his hollaring that seems to be driving me up the wal lately. I dont know what i can do about his frequent without warning bellowing if anythig happens anywhere that he doesnt like???


mojolucas - December 25

You son's behavior serves some kind of purpose. It maybe to gain attention, or a response to fear, joy, or excitement. It could be in response to something the hurts his hearing, and sense of smell or being tactile defensive. When a students presents us with a new behavior we try to focus and the need. To do this we start doc_menting the frequency in which the behavior occurs and what the possible triggers may be. If you can, do the same and you may learn what message your little guy is trying to convey. Secondly Look into ABA (Applied Behavior a___lysis) and TEACCH (Treatment and Education of Autistic and related Communication-handicapped CHildren). Lastlsy, find a good support group. There are many moms out there going through/experiencing the same thing. They can provide you with hope and tools to help your son be successful. Don't beat yourself on not seeking help as soon as you thought you should have. You helping him now and that's what matters. Early intervention is key. Be sure you have speech therapist involved as well. The can work wonders! Stay strong Downbutnotout!



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