13 Replies
anonymous - April 28

I am 16 and my girlfriend is 15, we have been having s_x for almost 2 years now but recently the condom split. We freaked out for a day but stupidly thought that because all the semen seemed to be in the condom it was okay. Then last week she told me she had been really worried so took a test...that came up positive, then took another one that also came up positive. I am so scared because she has been pregnant once before and decided to have an abortion and that was the worst time of my life, i just kept thinking that if i had been more careful she wouldnt have got pregnant and so it was my fault the baby died. I dont know if we can face another abortion but then again how can we bring a child into the world when we have virtually no money and basically, know nothing about bringing up a child??? When i have a baby i want it to be the happiest person on the planet and so i dont know if this is the time, but we are too scared to have an abortion. HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Audrey - April 28

Anonymous- Even if you are as careful as you can be, accidents happen. You had no control over the fact that the condom broke. Making the decision about what to do now is not an easy one. It's good that you are aware of the financial and emotional implications of keeping a child, so you and your girlfriend (and possibly both sets of parents if they know) need to sit down and discuss all your options. If she keeps the child, will you raise it yourselves or give it up for adoption? There are many people out there who want children but for some reason cannot. Abortion is a scary thing and while I'm not crazy about it myself I understand that there are some situations where it would be better to not bring a child into the situation. Go through all your options and pick one that's right for you. Best wishes!


Melissa - April 28

Well I think you should go together to Planed Parenthood and have a blood test done just to be sure. then depending on your results go to your parents together and enlist their help on coming up with the best decision. Good luck


Anne - April 28

I am sorry you are going through this. There is always adoption. There are couples who cannot have children and are ready and waiting for their dreams to happen. I am one of those people. I have been infertile for 5 years. My husband and I are actively seeking birthparents who want to have an adoption plan with us. Regardless of your decision to parent or not, I wish you both the best. You guys are probably really wonderful kids and I want everything to work out for you. If you are interested in talking about adoption and the types of adoption people go through please email me. I would love to chat, not just as a hopeful adoptive parent someday but just because I see the fear in your writing and I feel terrible. Here you were trying to be responsible using condoms and then that happened. Please email me so we can chat. Have your girlfriend talk with me too if she would like. My email address is [email protected]


Kay - April 28

I would love to talk with you or your girlfriend and offer support and advice. you can email me at [email protected]


Lace - April 28

I know a family who is looking to adopt. They were my foster family. They are really great people. You can email them if you would like at [email protected]


Cara - April 29

It is possible to raise I child at your age. I have done it, I got pregnant at 16 and I have a beautiful 11mo old son. It was really hard to be pregnant so young but it is possible to make things work. The government offers help if you need it, and if parents take it okay then they generally help out also. Abortion isnt something to take lightly esp. if you guys have already been through this before...I would say abortion isnt a back up birth control, so its def. a serious matter if a 15yr/old is already considering a 2nd abortion. If you need to sort through some things or your GF needs to talk to someone she can always email me at [email protected] I have been through this and now how tuff it is. Best of luck. PS- there is no such thing as a falso positive esp 2 postives in a row.


Missi - April 29

Well if you dont want an abortion then maybe consider adoption.


to cara - May 1

don't say there is no such thing a false positive. I missed my period and took two test that came positive. Yes I went to dr for blood test came out neg and he did an exam and said I wasn't. three weeks later I had my period. Weird as I have never been late except when I was pregant with my other two kids.


katie - May 1

yea...shes rite there is a such thing as a false positive...but if she is pregnant it will b matter wat u want to do..abortion adpotion or keepin it and raiseing it..the hardest thing is tellin your parents and given them time to get used to it but after tht it will b only 14 so if i can do it so can u and your girlfriend but gd luck xxx katie


Ree - May 1

Maybe its meant to be, if you get pregnant twice. alot of people cant get pregnant once. I had a abortion at 14, then fell pregnant again and had my daughter at 15. she is now 5, goes to school and I cant imagine my life without her. She's made my life! I only hope you can have the same happiness that I have. It is really hard at first, you miss out going out with your friends, just doing what you want,when you want. But now I wouldnt have it any different at all, I made new friends that were in the same boat as me. Anyway goodluck!


Once in your shoes - May 1

I was once where you are. I am now 33 and have three wonderful children. I choose to have and keep my child, but I will be the first to tell you that it is very, very hard, but that was my choice. On the other hand I had a friend who choose to give her child up in an open adoption. To this day her and I both have contact with her child. He is like a nephew to us. I would never give up my son but there were a lot of times I wished I could have done all that she did. She got to go on to college, she got to go on wild trips, she got a great job, and she still has a wonderful relationship with her son. I too have a wonderful family and love them with all my heart, but we struggled all the way and I just now finished college and earned my teaching degree. Just think long and hard. What ever you decide needs to be right for all THREE of you.


asura - May 1

I found out that I was pregnant in January. My boyfriend still is unsure about the idea, and we havent made a decision on what we are going to do. but if you want to talk, you can email me @ [email protected]


Ebony Johnson - May 2

I know that you are afraid but it ain't no need to be scared it ain't like the both of yall could turn back the hands of time. You and her tell both of yall parents at the same time.



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