My Opinion On Abortion

14 Replies
oklahoma - September 22

I agree with a lot of opinions posted on this site in regards to abortion. I believe a woman has a right to make that choice, but it should not be used as a form of birth control. I got pregnant at 18 and considered the idea for a split second, but changed my mind as soon as the thought entered it. Does that make me a bad person? I also considered adoption, and for everyone saying give it up for adoption instead, that's not always the easiest way out/choice either. Both adoption and abortions are hard decisions to make, and both have emotional consequences for the rest of the woman's life. There are tests that can be done to determine if the child is going to be okay. I was reading a post on here about a 17 year old who opted against having an abortion, and her child was born with no brain, only a brain stem. I have high respect for her raising a child at 17 who is terminally ill. The problem is, the extensive testing they do for women who are say 35 and older, they don't do for teenagers, or young adults. I have a friend who has had an abortion, and while I may not agree with why she did it, it is not my place to judge her. Having 2 children now, and pregnant with my 3rd, abortion would never cross my mind. We all need to remember that a lot of women post questions on here about abortion looking for support/and or answers. They are reaching out for help, and approaching this subject (even though it is very controversial, and a very heated topic) we shouldn't judge these women, considering it hasn't even been done. If they don't have a supportive family, or the dad isn't supportive, who are they going to turn to? Instead of calling them murderers or baby killers we should be able to voice our opinion in a more subtle way and not make them feel like a terrible person. When a woman miscarries it is considered an spontaneous abortion, and they usually have to get a dnc to make sure everything was cleaned out so infection doesn't set in. Is a woman a "baby killer" or "murderer" if she miscarries? I know that sounds like a stupid question, but a miscarriage is a type of abortion. Like I said before I am not for or against abortion, I just don't think these women should be slammed by people who don't know their situation.


Traci - September 22

Well said.... Oklahoma! I agree with you . You are right, girls do come on here for support & to seek advice. We should not judge them. However, Abortion cannot be compared to a miscarriage. Yes, another word for miscarriage is "spontanious Abortion" . But, Lets keep in mind that an "actual" abortion is something that is done intentionaly. A misacarriage is not. A miscarriage occurs when there is a problem with the pregnancy & it is just "Mother Nature" or "Gods" way of saying it wasn't meant to be. I think you have some very good points though in your post. I think you were very brave & I commend you for having your baby. That was a very brave thing to do. God bless you. GREAT POST!


Kari - October 1

Excellent post Oklahoma. I agree that abortion is neither right nor wrong, it depends entirely on the woman, the situation and the reasons for doing it. I know what you mean about miscarriage, traci is correct by saying you cannot directly compare the two but then I think you already know that. It's just the way you put it, I do know what you mean though. Your post here has been the most realistic and informative advice I have read anywhere on this forum. Well done and keep posting the very useful information. Also, good luck with number 3 and the rest of your family! xxx


Analei - October 3

I am sorry Oklahoma although I agree with most of what you said I however do not agree with your question "is a woman a baby killer or murderer if she miscarries?" A woman who miscarries does not make a choice to miscarry. A woman who has an abortion makes a choice. To even think a miscarriage is even remotely similar to an abortion is Crazy! You sounded so logical until that statement.


Oklahoma - October 3

a___lei, first of all technically a miscarriage is considered a "spontaneous abortion". Second of all, some women, not all, do have a choice on whether to miscarry. A woman who does drugs or drinks while pregnant, knowing that she is pregnant, has a high chance of miscarriage. Are you saying that it wouldn't be her fault she miscarried? After all, she made the choice to harm her body and baby while pregnant. I don't think you should be one to judge on what is logical and what is not. This is my opinion, operative word opinion.


Julie - October 3

First of all, most women who do drugs or drink do not miscarry. Look at the statistics. That is why America is overwhelmed by drug addicted babies, etc. The majority of women who miscarry are healthy women who for some unknown reason miscarried- Typically because the embryo did not attach to the uteran wall properly. A miscarriage is an act of GOD and the woman has no choice in the matter. If you had ever experienced a miscarriage you would not have ever made the statement you did, Oklahoma. A miscarriage is not only emotionally painful but physically as well. No woman has a miscarriage on purpose. It is devestating!!.. I know because I just had one and I did everything right. I am 32 and extremely healthy. I have never done drugs, smoked or even drank. I am insulted by your stupidity. An abortion is a choice. A woman who has an abortion is statistically a woman who does not want to deal with the responsibilities of her actions. Perhaps you should look at the statistics before you make such adolescent comments. Just for the record I am not being judgemental. It is just obvious that you have no life experience to back-up your adolescent comments about miscarriage vs. abortion.


Analei - October 3

Whatever, Oklahoma. It is apparent now that your initial post was merely to hear yourself speak. Miscarriage regardless is not a choice. Not every person who does drugs or alcohol intends to have a miscarriage. They do drugs or alchohol because it is an addiction or they are plain dumb and do not know the risks to a fetus. Abortion is a choice not matter how you look at it. Grow up.


Lane - October 3

Well, I used drugs the first couple of months of my pregnancy. Only because I did not know I was pregnant and I did not have a miscarriage. I would never have dreamed of having an abortion and I would have been sick if I would have miscarried. Miscarriage is nothing like abortion. Nobody, drug user or not chooses to have a miscarriage. Most of the time, like me, they do not know they are pregnant. I have since stopped using drugs but it took some time because I was an addict. My baby is healthy. I thought I was stupid but now I know Oklahoma is more stupid than I am/was.


Shorty - October 4

A Miscarrage is usually caused by something that is beyond the mothers control. A "spontaneous abortion" is an abortion without choice where your body rejects the pregnancy for some reason. A chemical or surgical abortion is where the mother has the choice to abort. There is a big difference and these two are incomparable. Its like saying that if you died of natural causes its the same as being murdered coz the end result is the same!?!?!? Please think before you make such a blatantly incorrect statement. You are not God so you can not justify others and their actions or circ_mstances. It is good that you voice your opinion and I agree that women should not be slammed if they have had an abortion. But people should not tolerate saying that an abortion is nothing and abusing that fact.


To Oaklahoma - October 6

"way out" Oh My God i cant Beleive you refered to adpotion and abortion as a "way out" how heartless are you!!??It honestly goes to show that you did not have the babys best interest at heart when you were thinking along those lines....OMG!!!


angel_one - October 6

ok this really hurt, i lost my baby in june, i did nothing wrong, as we were and still are ttcing, i wanted this baby very very much, and to be called a murder or baby killer is just plain mean!


Laura - October 6

Oklahoma your statements about miscarriage really put a knife in my heart. I am in my 30's, taking fertility drugs & miscarried recently. I did everything right. I was healthy prior to my pregnancy and I was taking prenatal vitamins. However, my uterus could not sustain the pregnancy and I lost the baby. I so desperately wanted my baby and losing the baby made me want to just die. The fact that you think a miscarriage is similar to an abortion is just down hurtful. Please think the next time before you post such nonsense.


Daile - October 11

Okay, I'm going to stand up for Oklahoma here, since everyone else is berating her. She was simply making an anology between abortion and miscarriage, trying to make the point that a woman who goes through either should not be labeled a murderer. Also, to the women who keep saying that "no one chooses to have a miscarriage," you are wrong. I know a woman who didn't realize she was pregnant until she started showing. Not having the money to have an abortion done by a professional, she intentionally miscarried. She actually stood next to a door while a friend of hers slammed the knob into her stomach until she started bleeding. True, not many people go to these extremes, but some do. You should not make generalizations, because they are rarely true.


To Daile - October 14

Your friend has serious problems, and needs mental help. That type of behaviour is not normal, and you sharing that piece of information is VERy dangerous, I wish you would use your head before you divulge information


Daile - October 15

I realize that that kind of behavior is not normal, but why is sharing it dangerous?? It wasn't me that did it, so no one has the right to get mad at me about it. Besides, this is an anonymous forum. And I do use my head before I post, which is why my posts sound halfway educated. I shared that information because it's not normal. Everyone tends to think that all pregnant women will react the same way to their pregnancy, and I was showing that they don't. I don't think there is anything wrong with sharing information.



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