Not Quite A Teen Pregnancy

9 Replies
LittleNami - May 4

Well, this is my first time being on these forums, first time on this site really, so hi to everyone who is here. Also, I would appreciate it greatly if people would not ridicule me for the topic at hand here, I've been reading a lot of it so far and not keen on it at all. But on with my topic. I am 20, so by most definitions I am not a teen, but in a way I still feel like one. I have not yet gotten through college, I still have a simple retail job, and I have not fully lived my life as I would want to. Recently, however, I had s_x with my boyfriend and the condom broke. I am not sure if it broke during s_x or afterwards, but regardless the implications are there. I immediately went to Planned Parenthood and took the "morning after" pill the day after in hopes of preventing that which I am most worried of. I was due for my period the day after I took the pill, but they warned me that since the pill stops conception, I might have a late period. Its been only 3 days since my period was due, 4 days since I took that pill, 5 since the incident. I know this is probably a short time to be expecting results, but I am very worried to say the least. I am not ready to be a mother by any means, and if I am pregnant that means the worst: to get an abortion. Now I know I will get chewed out by many women for even thinking this, but understand from my point. I am very scared of the idea of getting pregnant because I have a good chance for it. Both sides of my family were extremely fertile, 9 aunts and uncles on one side, 7 on the other. I do not have a stable enough job to even consider keeping the child for myself, nor a stable enough relationship with my boyfriend. I can't give the child up for adoption because as soon as I go through the pregnancy, I will have my mothering instinct kick in and could never give the child up, but could not give a proper life for the child, not to mention never being able to face my mother again for being pregnant. Please, any feedback would be very welcome, even just simple false encouragement that this is all in my head and I am not pregnant would be nice. I just don't like knowing that only two people know of my situation, my boyfriend and one of my close friends, you feel too alone that way.

 

LittleNami - May 4

Some other miscellanious information if you guys want it. Normally I use two forms of birth control, a condom and a hormone of some type, like Depo Vera or recently I was considering using the v____al ring. Also, this man is not the man I wish to spend the rest of my life with. He is emotionally abusive and in a way forced me to have s_x with him that night. I was very tired and kept refusing him, but he ended up carrying me to the bedroom anyways despite my refusals, and due to my fatigue at the time did not fight him afterwards. But I have always been afraid of leaving him since I don't know if he would hurt himself or not after my leaving. I know now that after this issue is over, I will leave him for good, regardless of his possible health afterwards. I should not be risking my health for his emotional neediness.

 

linzee - May 4

if you took the morning after pill, you dont have a very high chance, as far as i know.

 

young_mum_2_b - May 4

hi, i understand how scared u must feel. i was petrified when i thought...but now i know i am pregnant. i 'm sorry but i cant tell you just how affect the morning after pill is because i've never had an experience with it before nor do i know anyone that has. however, if you are pregnant and abortion is your only option, i dont agree with them, but i understand where your coming from. this is your body, your life, your decision. good luck with everything and i hope you get the outcome you want.

 

LittleNami - May 4

Thanks to both of you for responses. I know abortion is a decision I will regret later on, possibly might affect me fertility wise as well, but I do not want a child by this man, one that I can not depend or want to stay with, and I know I can't raise a child on my own. And as I said before, if I tried to give the child up for adoption, I know I would back out and try to keep the child for myself, I am too mothing -_- But thank you so much for taking the time to read this.

 

young_mum_2_b - May 4

your welcome, good luck again

 

Aussie Beck - May 4

Hello there. i have never used the morning after pill, but a friend of mine had to take it after a condom broke when she was having s_x with her bf. She didn't fall pregnant. Don't worry yourself too much - the morning after pill is very effective. Please think about yourself and your happiness and leave this bf of yours, he doesn't sound like a very nice person. It's time for you to think about yourself and do what's best for you! Good luck!!!

 

18wbabynov - May 5

wow. i think the morning after works. but just in case, maybe my story will make u feel not so alone. im 18, 19 in a few days, and i found out im pregnant 2 months ago. its with a guy who lives in another country... and who im no longer with. my mother wont speak with me... and i am now living with my dad and stepmom in the US... as opposed to the apt. i had in germany. i was scared, alone, horrified, and everything you described. abortion was never a thought with me, i cant do it, but that's up to your lifestyle. im going to work my a__s off, keep my child, and do school as best i can. i only have 1 yr of college done... long way to go, but i wouldnt be happy any other way. if you wanna talk, just send me an email. i was really alone in all this too... living in a foreign country with no one i really knew. pregnancy is scary, but there are rewards too... you cant forget those. email. [email protected]

 

marie7 - May 5

LittleNami, because this happend just a few days before you expected your period you should be fine pill or no pill. The fertile window is typically 14 days before your period if you are on a 28 day cycle. You are so close to your period that you probably ovulated a long time before this encounter ever occured. Hope this helps :)

 

LittleNami - May 6

Thank you to everyone for your stories and your encouragement. I just had my period yesterday, so I would a__sume that I am alright now. In a way, however, part of me is a little empty knowing that I pa__sed up my chance for motherhood now, but I know that I am not trully ready to give my fullest love to my child yet. Hopefully I will find a guy that is fully supportive of me and not abusive, and we can do this together then. As for the boyfriend in all of this dealing, I have left him now with a__surance that he is not a father, but he keeps calling me begging me to take him back and otherwise making me very nervous at heart. I do have friends and family though that can help me keep him away thankfully. Thank you once againto all of you for your support with this matter though ^^

 

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