Please Tell Me Why

18 Replies
Jen - October 6

Why do young girls want babies? For someone to love them? Babies/children need love and 100% attention. Do young gilrs really have the life experiences to parent a child? I wish I could go back and be a teen was fun. Why do they want to grow up so fast?


Holly - October 6

They are thinking with their organs & hormones not their heads. If they had any sense they would realize being an adult is no fun---All there is is Responsibility such as bills, job, car pymnts, buying food, house/apt. pymnts, kids, pets, etc. Why have that responsibilty at an age where you are supposed to be having fun. Take it from me----I would love to give up my responsibilities & be a teen again. You have the rest of your life for responsibility & only a few years for fun & carefree living.


angel_one - October 7

i agree holly, i sit here (on a bad baby day) and think god i wish i was back in high school, having fun, only having to work for money to spend on stuff that i wanted,!!! not on bills, and loans and c___p like that, i Miss School!!! lol


Judith - October 7

I agree. Your teen years are the most fun, high school & college. Your biggest worries should be who likes who & what to wear. It is a shame that all these teens are hurrying past they best years of their life to become adults way to soon. They don't realize that can't get those years back. Adulthood goes on until you die. A baby makes you become an adult and the teen fun years are left behind. They will realize one day that they really missed out & it will be a shame. Enjoy being a teen. Save babies for later- you have plenty of time.


GuitarJade - October 7

See, everybody tells me (as a teenager) that these are the best years of my life, that there is so much out there waiting for me, that I have the whole world yet to see. Well, as one who was robbed of her childhood and teenage years, why should I worry about being a teenager when somebody stole most of the years from me? As one who wanted to have kids since the time she was 15, I can understand why so many girls want to have babies. They want to feel loved and have a sense of importance. It's not that they want to grow up so fast, it's that they want to have something to hold on to. No, I don't think that teenagers have the experiences to parent a child (except in extreme circ_mstances), but that doesn't change the fact that they want one. I waited to have children (even though the want for one was so bad it almost killed me)... and it was one of the best decisions of my life.


Dee - October 7

You don't have a child to feel loved. Children do not always love you especially when they get punished or become teenagers themselves. If you do not love yourself, not even children will love you. Children also do not give you a sense of importance. Having a purpose & goal in life will give you that sense of importance. You statements just clarify that lack of self that most teenagers have.


GuitarJade - October 7

Unfortunatly, Dee, I don't agree with you. I believe in something called "unconditional love" and I believe that children will always love their parents (except in the most extreme of circ_mstances), even when they get punished and become teenagers. I should know... my parents weren't the greatest, but I still love them... even through everything that happened. But I do agree that you have to love yourself before anybody else can love you... but who's to say that the teenagers who want children don't love themseleves? Maybe they just want to feel loved by somebody else. And for some people, to be a mother is their goal... I know it's mine. I'm attending college to get my dregree, but afterwards, I want to get married and have kids and be a stay-at-home mother. I know that raising my sisters BY MYSELF, gave a sense of importance... so I'd think that raising my own children, my own flesh and blood, would give me the same sense of importance. And, to be completely honest, I have a "sense of self." I know what I want, and I'll reach my goals. And there's a lot I don't know... I just happen to know what's going on in a lot of teenagers minds when they say they want kids, that's all.


Jen - October 7

It's true children always love their parents. My husband and I were foster parents and you would be amazed about the things the parents did or said to their kids but their kids always looked up to them and loved them. I'ts not until they get older that they can hate and resent


Anj - October 7

You guys are saying children give unconditional love. That's funny b/c children have no sense of what love means. You think they come out knowing what love is? Ask any young child, who has not been coached, and they will say they don't know or they have answers like "my mommy loves me because she buys me things", etc. They simply do not understand that love is an emotion. If you are having children simply to be loved you are having them for the wrong reasons. Hopefully, you will rethink that statement before you take such a huge step in having children. Couples are supposed to have children to unite themselves w/each other & to share their love by making a baby. Couples who are ready to have children do not say they are having them to be loved. What a joke. You know teenagers b/c your mind is still that of a teenager. Sorry, but it's true.


Madeline - October 7

This is exactly why there are so many teen pregnancies in this world today. You all have this misconception that you have a baby to be loved. Children are hard work and having them to be loved is so adolecent. If you want to be loved get a dog!!.. Children or dogs for that matter are not objects that you possess. Children are made of love to keep society from becoming extinct. If your only sense of purpose is to have children you really need to set some goals for yourself and take a hard look at what is missing in your life. I guarantee woman who are driven are not sitting around pining for the day to have a baby just so they can feel loved.


GuitarJade - October 7

I'm sorry... but that's just how I feel. Yes, I may still be a teenager, but I know what I want. I'm not "sitting around" nor am I "pining away" waiting to have children. I'm here, at college, active and having fun being a teenager. I don't go out partying, and I don't drink or use drugs... I study hard to be the best that I can be and I have fun with those people who share my beliefs. And I also believe that children do know what love is, they just can't define it. Children are born with love in their hearts, and to have a child is an act of love... both making it and wanting it. Why have children if you don't love them and they "don't know what love is?" There'd be no purpose. I know many mothers who had their children because they wanted somebody (other than their spouse) to love and they wanted to be loved. I'm glad that you all think that children are made so society doesn't go "extinct." And please, don't go biting my head off about the whole thing... she asked a question and I answered if from the stand-point of a teenager... considering I am a teenager and still think like one... therefore, I know why teenagers want babies!


Leannette - October 7

Children are not born with love in there hearts. Children are born with innocense. There is a difference. Thank God you are in college because you clearly are not ready to be a parent. Your outlook is extremely naive and sheltered. Once you get into the real world, believe me college is not it---I have a Masters Degree so I know, you will understand what hard work really is which includes paying the bills, working to make a marriage last, and raising children. You don't understand this yet because you are young, in college, and haven't had to do it yet.


Madeline - October 7

Learn to read-- Nobody said anything about not loving their children.


GuitarJade - October 7

Excuse me, but you don't know me... therefore you don't know if I'm ready or not to be a parent. If you would take the time to think about it, you may be able to see where I'm coming from instead of your "holier than thou" stances. For starters, my parents were never around... I have 2 youngers sisters (they just turned 15 and 10) and for the past 7 years of their lives I have raised them. I raised 2 kids, cooked food, separated bills so my dad could pay them, cleaned house, did laundry etc. while my parents were to were busy hating each other to care. My outlook on children and and the "real world" is not sheltered nor is naive... I just happen to have a more positive outlook. I tend to believe that children are born with love... you can believe that children are born with innocense. Both are an opinion and therefore, neither are wrong. And I never said that you don't love your children, but it has been stated that one of the purposes of children is to make sure society doesn't go extinct. As I said, she asked a question... and I answered. Don't dump on me because my opinions differ from yours.


Cory - October 7

"Seperating bills so my dad could pay them" is not responsibility. The responsiblity comes with paying those bills. Do you realize how much it costs to food, cloth, and shelter yourself much less even 1 child? That doesn't even include insurance, college tuition, or a wedding. A big part of raising children are the things I just stated. Cooking, cleaning, and seperating the bills are small things that once they turn a certain age they can a__sist with or even do. It is called chores. Children can't bring home the money. A 15 year old should definitely be able to cook for themselves and do laundry. A responsible child should be able to clean by 8 at best. I am sorry but it sounds like you are complaining because your parents made you responsible & gave you chores while they worked to make sure you had a home to live in, clothes to wear, food to eat & cook, etc. I hate to break it too you but in most families the oldest child does typically care for the younger children while the parents work. This is especially common in different cultures so most people would consider your situation common. Sorry, but you need to get over yourself.


Cory - October 7

Before you trash me. I am under 18 & I at least know this to be true.


Adam - October 7

Teenage girls do not have the life experience or financial support to raise children. As you can see from prior posters they want someone to love them. That is the worst reason to have a child & that is pretty much what every teen girl says. They say that due to a lack of maturity. Love from a child is not unconditional. As an adult you provide them necessary things for survival which they respond in a form of basic love because they cannot give you anything else. Statistically, children who are polled do not know what loving someone truly is. They think it is being nice, sharing their candy, etc. Basic things that you can get from a pet once they are trained (ie. good behavior, licking, sitting, etc). Love is conditioning which is not necessarily from our parents. We receive conditioning from our environment by just watching others around us, even television. To say a child is born with love is an uninformed and uneducated opinion. Once teenage girls become woman they will realize that having a child is about more than having someone love them. Life doesn't work that way unfortunately.



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