Mom Babysitting But Smokes ALOT

11 Replies
shelly - December 20

My mom want to babysit once my little guy gets here, but smokes a couple packs of cigarettes a day. She dosen't even open a window, so you could imagine how smelly it is. I think if I told her that it bothered me she might go outside while he's there, but her house still smells really bad of cigarettes. If I go over there for 5 minutes I leave smelling terrible!! I don't know what to do because I know she's looking forward to watching him when he gets here, but I'll be afraid to even bring anything over there because it'll smell when I bring it home!! Anyone else gonna have to deal with this??

 

Charlene - December 20

Sorry, but yuck!! My mom is a smoker too and has learned to smoke outside. I am a non smoker and cannot stand it - it really irritates me. My breathing changes etc. I still don't even like the smell of 2nd hand smoke , I am that sensitive. Could she babysit at your house and smoke outside? When you don't smoke, you definitely notice the smells on other things. I also wonder what my baby will be liek with my mom as she will still smell of some smoke. Best of luck to you

 

Amber - December 20

Why dont you suggest that she baby sit at your place? Smoke free area! Tell her shes not welcome to smoke around your baby, most people are very good about not smoking when babies are involved. Hopefully she will understand!

 

H - December 20

I have parents that smoke also, but live far away. When my daughter was born and they all came out they understood the rules: 1) Smoke outside 2) come in and change shirts 3) wash hands thoroughly. These were the minimum requirements that the pediatrician said that I should except. Babies can develop to many problems including pneumonia due to second hand smoke. They can even develop problems when a smoker holds them against the shirt that they smoked in. Good luck. My parents were fine with these rules. I had childhood asthma and they don't want my children to go through that.

 

Emy - December 20

I have the same problem with my MIL. The house and she reek! But my poor dh had really bad childhood asthma - which was not helped by her smoking- and we both don't want to subject our daughter to that. I think the idea of having her come to your place is a good one. Since it is your mom, and not your MIL, hopefully you feel more comfortable just telling her plainly that it is not something you want to subject your child to. I am sure she will understand.

 

Maria - December 20

You have to tell her something. But do it nicely and as calm as you can. It's your child, you have to do what you have to do. No matter who it is. when I had my first child I made everyone wash their hands before touching him. And I am planning on doing the same thing with the child.

 

hottmomaof6 - December 20

my parents are divorced and neither of them honor my wishes of not smoking around my kids. 2 of them have asthma, so in turn basically they have nothing to do with them. And when they do decide to pop over my house smells like them. No smoking is allowed anywhere near my home. Even tho your mom means well just tell her how you feel and you dont want that near your son and dont want him to smell like that. I hope she honors your wishes cause that can make your baby sick. Good luck!

 

rae - December 21

dont forget, smoking around baby greatly increases the risk of sids. dont chance it.

 

zora - December 21

my mum smokes too but I have told her to please smoke outside if she wants to look after my son. She respects that and smokes outside :)

 

shelly - December 21

Thanks for all the advice, it just sucks because I know it's going to be an argument. Is it harmful for the baby just to be in a house where someone smokes all the time? Even if she's not smoking while he's there, he's still going to smell like smoke is that still harmful?

 

terri - December 21

Shelley.. I personally would not allow her to watch the baby at her house.. i mean it is already smoke smelling which is disgusiting and also who is to say that while you are gone she is going to smoke outside.. she should respect your wishes for her not to smoke around your baby.. i know both my parents smoke and my mother mentioned the other day that i am going to be taking the baby down there to visit her and i was like only if you guys smoke outside while the baby is here and she said no way this is my place and i am not smoking outisde and i was like suit yourself cause your grandchild will not be coming to visit unless you change your mind.. you have to be blunt in order to get the point across.. and i would suggest again that she babysit at your house and this way you would be able to tell if she was smokign in the house and also your son wouldnt smell like a dirty ol ashtray when you pick him up.

 

Jean - December 21

I agree; I would not let her watch the baby in a home that she smokes in. I know it will be had to confront her with this, but you have to act in the best interest of the baby. And so should she. We told my MIL that if she took up smoking again (she quit over a year ago but she's been known to go back to it) she would *not* be allowed to watch our child. That really motivated her to stay off the tobacco - she knows it's bad for her and the baby. And your mom should realize the same thing.

 

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