Mother In Laws Just Hormones

11 Replies
drh - September 26

Are any of you all feeling differently about your in-laws especially mother in laws now that your baby's birth is approaching? I can honestly say that mine has done nothing "wrong" I just can't hardly stand to be around her or talk to her right now. I had felt like this from time to time before but it seems to be a constant feeling now.I am trying so hard to be polite but just the thought of her sends chills up my spine. I have this sudden possesive feeling about my baby toward her and she isn't even born yet. I do not feel this way toward anyone else JUST HER. All these other ladies welcome their MIL into the delivery room with them, but NOT ME. Please tell me I am not alone. I really do feel guilty that I even feel this way and am trying hard to keep it under wraps.....anyone else?

 

mariah - September 26

oh my god! You are describing me to a T. I'm sure it's just hormones or something like that. Maybe feeling a little compet_tive because you both will be moms. Maybe feeling like she will try to take over. I don't know,I don't really have an answer for it. My bf's mother is the sweetest lady ever but I have thoughts sometimes that I don't even want her to touch my baby or kiss her at all. When I take my dog out there she takes over and gives him treats and takes him outside and even though it's a really nice thing she is doing I feel my blood getting so high...lol I'm sure everything will be fine though. You'll love that she can help out when she can because when your little one is here you will be so tired. Don't try to be super mom and do everything,let people help you out you'll need the extra time to sleep and shower.

 

To drh - September 26

I cant believe how much you sound like me!!!!! My MIL is a liitle crazy and annoying, but we've always got along. Ever since I've been pregnant I cant freakin stand her. Anything she says or does makes me almost hate her. Then she goes out and gets a car seat, stroller and all this stuff for the baby which really irritated me. Like she thinks shes going to be hauling my baby around every where. I dont think soo, especially because she's a flippen chain smoker! Then I was talking about how Im b___st feeding. She has the nerve to say, " Well I guess I wont be getting the baby on the weekends." I wanted to be like no f*$%*kn way would you be getting him on the weekends whether I was brestfeeding or not. Does she think im just going to drop him on so I can party all weekend. Please my baby isn't staying the night with anyone but me. I no she also gets jealous because my mom and I are so close. I live with my mom and her and my boyfriend are the only ones allowed in the room while im delivering. I know she wants to be in there, but no thanks. I cant stand her at all right now!!!! Its even causing fights between my boyfriend and I! KT

 

Jen - September 26

To KT and all the ladies- I am sooooo relieved to hear these feelings are not just me being completely insane! I have also felt this way since I have been prego- it is getting almost impossible to bite my tongue, and it has slipped a few times. My MIL is very controlling, and wants to stay with us for several weeks after he is born...yeah right! She too went out and bought everything you could need to care for an infant, and I had to tell her that it will be a VERY LONG TIME before I leave him with anyone, I mean, she lives over 2 hours away. Why in the hell does she need all that c___p at her place? I have also felt guilty about some of the thoughts going through my head (some of them I wouldn't even dare post here), but this is my husband's and my baby, and we have very clear ideas about how we want things to go. Sorry, I just needed to vent a little bit. Anyway, you are not alone in your feelings!

 

kr - September 26

I thought I was soo bad. Thank you! My MIL is also driving me crazy. But she has not done one thing. She shows no interest in the baby and has made it clear she will not be interested till it is out of infantcy.That is till she is around her co-workers, then its as if the baby were hers. I think this is strange as this is her first grandchild. my husband's feeelings are crushed. But I don't mind. If she's going to be so cold, then my baby does not need to be around her anyway!

 

ChrissyR - September 27

Me too!!!! I cannot stand to be around my MIL. Everything she does annoys me. She is a little bit of an annoying person and she is kind of really ditzy but we have always gotten along pretty well. She's always wanting to put her hands on my belly (and she doesn't even ask)...it makes me cringe and want to throw up. She also keeps mentioning having a car seat for the baby...in my mind I am thinking no way! She has a car seat for my 3 year old... but there is no way I am sending both of them with her at the same time... .she is too dumb to handle it!! She keeps saying she will take time off of work after my mom goes home so she can come help me... i do not want her too...she is really no help!

 

jg - September 27

i'm right there with you - but one small detail; it's my OWN mother that i can't stand to be around!! she keeps saying things all condesending about "well, have you got a lot to learn" .. and criticizing me for not buying an entirely pink wardrobe for my baby girl. she never asks how i'm feeling, just gives her unwanted 2 cents. this isn't a new thing for her, she's often like this but i guess it could be hormones making me more sensitive to it. that, and becoming a mother holds a certain set of responsibilities which i feel capable of handling. maybe she just doesn't see that yet.

 

Jaclyn - November 16

Oh what a relief to hear these comments. Luckily, my mother-in-law is my husbands step-mother, so he doesn't get offended when I get annoyed! She asked me if I was planning on staying over at her house after the baby is born. Why the hell would I stay at her house when all of the babies stuff is at our house?? All she wants to look at is girl clothing when we are out shopping (we are having a boy!). She even made a comment that she hopes I am not like her other sons wife b/c she is 'selfish' with her baby!

 

TCM - November 16

Mine is my Sister In Law - cannot stand her!!

 

Beth - November 17

Mine is my FIL-I can't stand him, I'm now attempting to avoid him until after birth when I have all of these hormones out of me-I just hope I can stand him then! Also, I wouldn't trust him to babysit/even hold my baby, I don't know how any of his kids survived, he must've left it all up to my MIL! How do you keep a first grandchild away from a grandparent that you don't trust?

 

Lynn - November 17

I am getting the same way with my MIL, she is very possesive over my stepson and pretty much takes over with him anytime she is around, she was bragging about how when he was 4 months old he spent a whole month at her house! and I was like don't think that's going to happen with this baby! Plus, I was looking for a cross to give to the baby when we got her baptized and my husband informed me that we didn;t need to buy one, the cross has already been bought. I was like FROM WHO? and he said his mother. I kindly let him know that she was beginning to overstep her boundaries and there are certain things that mothers look forward to buying for their daughters! And then she sent the baby her "Christmas Outfit" the other day, so now she expect sus to get Christmas pictures taken in the outfit that she bought!

 

Tracy - November 17

I'm right there with you. My mil and I have never really gotten along well anyways, and now it's just worse. It really does feel like she's claimed this baby. She went and bought a car seat and stroller also - then took it a step further - they're quite wealthy, and they have turned one of their extra rooms into a full nursery. CREEPY!! I wish I could just tell this baby to never come out. I know that all the in-laws (there's not a one of them that's worth a d__n) are planning on being at the hospital when the baby's born, and that just makes my stomach turn over. My husband and I have gotten into several arguments, because I honestly don't want them to even be called until the baby is out, and we are settled. I know that sounds harsh, but these people are terrible!!

 

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