Really Upset

9 Replies
babyonboard16 - February 11

Okay basically I'm now wanting to do a home birth, but I've had complications and I don't think it may be safe. I really don't want to deal with the hospital because I want freedom. I don't want to be there for days. I had to spend 7 hours being monitored one night and couldn't even get a nurse to bring me a blanket, so I don't honestly think I want to do it that way. I am terrified of having a baby now, not because of pain, not becase of the actual process but because I'm scared I won't be attended to, and I won't get the experience I want. What would you do?


xoxticiaxox - February 11

Hey, I would do a list of pros and cons, and make sure that the baby is normal, and growing well. If you have had difficulties in the past with birth, dont you think a little suffereing is better than the possibility of looseing your child? I know exactly what you mean about hospitals...they suck! But I would rather have my baby healthy and looked after with all the medical care right there...than have her at home, and teh realize something is wrong. Good Luck and I do hope everythign goes well, If you do have a home birth, make sure you have a midwife there. NO matter how well a pregnancy goes...something can always go wrong last minute....


babyonboard16 - February 11

Ive never given birth before, BUT I've had a partial placental abruption whe nI was 6 weeks that healed, and I had a low lying placenta that;s now okay too.


xoxticiaxox - February 11

Ask your doctor what they think is best, and go from there? If they is any risk though I would do it in the hospital.


SaraH - February 12

If you've had complications that could potentially cause a problem during labor I would not do a home birth. However, if the complications are things that would have nothing to do w/ endangering a full term baby during labor then I would think that a home birth might be okay. Do not do a home birth though if you think that there could be some problems that could endanger your baby, as obviously being uncomfortable and sitting around in a hospital stinks, but is not worth potential harm to your child. If you do decide on a home birth make sure you get a midwife to help and are close enough to a hospital that if something were to go wrong you could get there quickly (if you live an hour from a hospital I wouldn't really recommend a home birth). --By the way another option if you could look at if you find a midwife is a birthing center. This would be a more "natural" and a less confining setting then a hospital, but more medically equipped and prepared for emergencies then a home birth.


MommyMeg07 - February 12

That's a toughie. Hospitals do suck. But I, personally, would be terrified to do a home birth!! Just remember that even if the nurses suck or whatnot, the birth of your baby will make you forget all of that. But shoot, if you're brave enough, and feel there's no risk for the baby, you could do a home birth too! The girl above me had great advice with saying not to do it if you lived too far away from the hospital. Good luck with whatever you choose!:)


jue - February 12

i had the same fears with our local large maternity hospital and my fears were made real when i had my first son at that hospital, when i had my second i refused point blank to have him there. when it cam to my 3rd son who is now 6.5 weeks old i was having problems with the preg and they tried to send me to the large maternity hospital, i looked around and found a realy nice smaller midwife led unit which also had doctors as a back up if needed. i spoke to my midwifes and gp and was tranferred at 27 weeks preg to the smaller maternity unit where i had my little boy who was born at 36 weeks 5 days and weighted in at 5lb 2oz. he was healthy and we were looked after and we both went home the following day. you don't have to settle for what the doctors want, you have a say in where you have your baby and have some say in the birth, but the birth will go the way it wants unfortunately unless you have a C-section. don't give up yet. good luck with your birth and have a chat to your midwife about your options.


babyonboard16 - February 12

Thank you for your opinions. There is a birthing center pretty close to here, and they have a back up doctor, who is really close to the birthing center, and the best hospital where I live is less than 20 mins from it, so it may work. I dunno if I can afford it though.


candaceann1 - February 12

I am suprised I wanted more children after having my daughter 7 years ago. My hospital experience was aweful. I thought it was a good hospital because it was in an upscale neighborhood and was supposed to be a good. My nurses were nasty. I had to buzz them all the time and they had att_tudes. This time, I have switched hospitals and doctors. I am very comfortable with my new hospital. If you are not comfortable with your doctor, nurses and hospital, I would REALLY consider switching. I believe my being so uncomfortable and basically being ignored the first time stopped my progression causing me to have a c-section. I have also hired a doula to help comfort and tend to me during my delivery because eventhough I am comfortable with the nurses and doctors, I still need someone there other than my husband to help tend to MY needs.


MAT - February 12

I love the idea of a birthing center. If for some reason you can't find an alternative to your hospital, make sure you bring someone with you. You can hire a doula (I think it costs around $500, but I don't know for sure - check At the very least, bring a partner, friend or relative who will be an advocate for what you want. Make sure they are in agreement with your wishes AND have a strong enough personality to demand the nurses do what you need.



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