OT Break Tradition

4 Replies
tryingx3 - November 8

How do I break a gift giving tradition? My best friend and I neither one need anything and I have tried suggesting we go together and sponsor a child or something at Christmas. She didn't even acknowledge that I asked. NOW...she is married, our spouses don't have anything in common and I have a little girl (who I know she will buy for). What do I do? I think it is crazy to swap gift cards for restaurants but I think that is about where we are at!

 

Brittany - November 9

Does she have a child? If not, it seems like your lives are different now. She doesn't understand how your feeling, you have a child now to buy presents for on holidays and she doesn't so maybe she still feels the need to do this tradition with you because she has no one else to do it with. If she is your best friend, you should tell her how you feel, or you could just make her happy and buy her something! Maybe instead of a gift card, you could buy her something different, spice it up!

 

tryingx3 - November 9

We have been exchanging gifts for years - at first it was just us (I would buy something small for her high school aged son)...then I got married...she added something for my spouse...that was 6 years ago...I started THEN trying to break the tradition and having us do something for some charity....since then I have added a child and she has added a spouse...she did the gift certificate last year and a gift for my daughter. I did something for her and her son. Until she married, she has always been invited to our Christmas events...my family also bought for her and she would do cookies and stuff for them. Etc... I guess the point I am trying to make is that we are both blessed and don't need anything - why don't we still do something, but not for each other, per se?

 

tryingx3 - November 9

Okay - we just talked...and we have agreed to get together for a dinner or a movie as couples and not exchange...we will see if she follows through!

 

mjvdec01 - November 12

How about the two of you go to lunch one day, then go to the mall together and find one of the charity giving trees. You can each choose a child to buy for and make it fun. On the way back to the car, stop at starbucks and call it a day...Merry Christmas! :} You have to just be blunt with your friend. She knows she doesn't need anything, you just have to be the one to say it. There is no reason why she should be upset, it is supposed to be about what you can give, not how much you get.

 

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