11 Replies
jenna32 - February 20

Just wondering how many of you had your kids baptised or if you go to church regularly or anything. My family was never big on church, i'm not sure if i want to push beliefs on my child, i think maybe i'll let her decide for herself once she's old enough,i'll take her once or twice. Just wondering what everyone else is doing and other opinions on it.


Whitney - February 20

Hi there, just wanted to let you know what I did & why ... I was raised catholic & it was pretty much forced down my throat every day by my mom & grandparents, we prayed the rosary multiple times a day, I was forced to go to church EVERY Sunday until I was 15, I had to go to confession all the time as a child even when I had nothing to confess, which I hated! I just hated all of it, & I had no choice & my family never taught me anything about other religions which mad me mad, because just because they are different, doesn't make them wrong. When I was 15 I had enough & begged my mom to stop making me go, as I got older I studied other religions & found many of them facinating & I totally respect them & think every person has the right to believe what ever they want as long as they don't force it on anyone. I am now agnostic & so is my husband (basicaly we believe there is something up there greater then us, but don't know what - therefore we don't practice anything) we believe in evolution & science, but we still celebrate X mas & easter because it's just fun, & just overall try to be good people. We decided not to baptise my 3 year old son, & 6 month old daughter ... now I may be wrong, but I think from what I learned in church is that people are soposed to baptise, so that if/when you pa__s away that you go to heaven & not hell. Well, I just have a really hard time in believing that if an innocent child died & was not baptised, that if there was a god - he would send the child to hell. We got allot of flack from family for not baptising, but I don't care - these are my children & I want them to make up their own mind. We are going to teach them about many different religions when they are older & let them make up their own mind. But that's just my opinion, I'm sure many people have different idea's & opinions on this subject, but that is what works for us.


Cathy2 - February 23

Hey Whitney! While my parents didn't shove religion down my throat quite as much as yours, I did go to a United Chirch every Sunday, went to sunday school but then decided at 12 that I did not want to be confirmed. I already knew then that inst_tutionalized religion was not for me. I stoppped going to church at that point and since then minored in relgion in university. Like you I found that there are many wonderufl relgions, different vews of the world and they basicallya ll have the same good lessons to teach. However, I also find that almost every religion is also some laced with s_xism, racism or one of the two.... Here is my dilemma....while I am content to teach my daighter a little bit about all religions, I prefer her to teach her right and wrong and based a personal sense of morality...I have never need a religion or fear of God to keep me honest, humble or law abiding. However, my husband, while he is not staunch in his beliefs, would like to take her to the Gurudwara (a sikh church) just to expose her to it. He feels it is important that she knows how to pray the way his family does and that she atleast feels comfortable in that environement. It''s not like he's going to take her all the time, and he himself hever talks about religion,or really thinks of it much...I jsut feel like it's so unnecessary...I mean she will learn to cover her head, sit on the side of the hall with women only...I hate it!!!! If there is a God, SHE/HE does not care about all these man made contrived notions ol holiness, I"m sure of it! Anyway, that's where I'm at right now....


jenna32 - February 23

You guys have some good ideas. I can't say i've ever remember (not even once) going to church. But there are a lot of ideas out there i also believe there's some sort of higher power out there and there has to be some kind of world after death but i don't like to stick to one theory either. i feel really sorry for kids who have religion pushed on them. i remember cooping a kid in kindergarden who i had to stay behind with because he was a jahova witness and i know i shouldn't have asked but i asked if he minded staying behind while his friends got to go sing christmas carols in the gym, because he seemed kind of down. He said something like" i don't care,they are going to hell,my god is the real god" or something like that. i was like wow, they must really pushed some religion on this kid. I agree with teaching based on morality, that's pretty much what i plan on to.


clindholm - February 23

My family was raised catholic, and when my mom got divorced from an abusive drunk, we were not allowed to attend church anymore. Pathetic, huh? Anyway, I wanted my lo's to share my belief in God so we had our dd baptised in the United Methodist Church. My dh was raised Methodist and it seemed like a good fit. We joke that Methodist is like "Catholic Light". All the God and Jesus without all the guilt, lol. Our 4 month old ds will be baptised and we now go to church pretty regularly. I think it's important to find the right religion for your family. We lucked out and chose a great church with a wonderful pastor. Our Pastor even visited my ds while he was in the NICU. Good luck with whatever you decide.


DDT - February 24

My Mom came from a fervent Baptist background. My father came from a non-religious background. By 17 my Mom was so repulsed by the strict, dogmatic society she was raised in that she left all her religious ties behind her after marrying my Dad. By the time my brothers and I were in our pre-teens/teenager years my Mom decided she wanted to give us a chance to see if we wanted to go to Church. But she didn't want to force us because that is what she had to go through. So after about 6 months of us going to the service as a family, my Mom would ask us if we wanted to go to Sunday School. We did, and we went for about another year but then my brothers decided they didn't want to go anymore. I continued going to the Youth Group and met lots of great friends and people. But then I had too many questions that either couldn't be answered sensibly or logically. I had questions that I wasn't satisfied with so I left, and haven't set foot in another church in 12 years. I agree with my parent's approach though...even though I am not religious myself I would still like to give my boys the opportunity to attend church to see if it appeals to them. BTW my brothers and I were baptised in our preteens because that was the only way we could attend church. We weren't allowed to otherwise. I was about 15 years old when I was baptised. My husband isn't religious either and we don't plan on getting our boys baptised (currently 2 and 9 months old). They can make that decision for themselves later in life if neccessary.


DDT - February 24



jaa - February 24

I guess I'm going a little against the tide here, but I have a different thought. People's adult reaction to their childhood church experience may not be entirely related to church/religion. It may be more about them and their personality. For example: my sister and I were raised going to church, Sunday school, etc, our whole lives. Now, she, like many responders, is angry at religion, God, our parents, etc. However, I feel grateful to all of the above for the foundation and life perspective, etc, it has given me. I feel my life has been nothing but enhanced by knowing God, and religion/church has been the primary vehicle to reach that relationship. We have 2 very different responses to the same church history. I'm not writing this to convince you to take your children to church; more to suggest that maybe your children's personalities will dictate their reaction to religion... so rather than guessing how they may react to church and basing your decision on that, it might be a good idea to come to terms with what you really truly believe, and go from there. Once you know in your heart what you believe, you can teach that, while still offering respect for other beliefs and exposure to other religions.


wantanotheraftertr - February 24

jenna I was raise southern baptist I loved it as a child. I believe in Jesus and it is veryimportant to me that me children learn everything they can about him. The most important thing I can give them is the knowledge of him and they are the only ones that can make the decision to except him or not. I believe children are a gift from God and they are ours on loan from him. We are expected to do the best we can with them. My dh was raised catholic never really practiced it it was too much (religion) as was baptist for me later in life. We are now non denominational we believe what the Bible says we go to church very regurlarly by choice not because anyone tells us to its for the fellowship with others and the worship of God. We didn't baptise our children thats something they need to decide for themselves as God gave us free will. All of my children have chosen to be baptised. One doesn't go to church any more but thats for him to decide. All I can do is pray for my children and guide them in the right direction. They all know my beliefs and that they are worth my time and effort to teach them the most important thing there is in life. I want my family to have eternal life. The chioce is yours what you choose to do. You have heard many opinion of others who do not go I just wanted you to hear the other less popular side as well I know you will make the best choice you can for your family.


Kim123 - February 24

Hello. My daughter just turned a year and I have yet to get her baptized. I want to but I just have not gotten around to it yet. I do not go to church, even though I am a confirmed catholic. I just wanted to share what my mother has been telling me so much lately..she was raised with no relgion..her father believed in letting the kids pick their own, and for her, she always felt like she was missing out because she grew up as a child without a religion. I was never in that position and I'm not quite sure what I am going to do with my daughter yet either. But I guess I do believe that religion plays a huge role in an adults life, but also in a childs life and maybe it isn't something that they should go too long without.


jacobsmom - February 25

I was raised catholic, but it has been some fifteen years since I last attended church. Even though my att_tude toward religion has changed a lot throughout the years, I still believe in baptism (got that better safe than sorry ingrained in me I guess LOL). I had our son baptized last summer (it also made my grandparent very happy) and don't really regret it. To me baptism only means something if you believe in it- otherwise it's just a bit of water poured over the child's head. It will still be my son's decision whether or not it will mean something to him as he gets older.


kimberly - February 25

I certainly believe in god! But, I am not a real religious person. I attended church some as a kid and a few times as a adult but I don't go on a regular basis but I do want my kids to go. I don't really force it on them but I do make them be a part of church. My oldest is 10 now and he has been going since he was 4 and he likes it, I let him miss every now and then and he only goes sunday morning. My youngest is 5 and he just started going, he don't like it much yet but I still want him to go. I didn't go alot when I was a kid and I wish I did. Now as a adult I have read the bible myself just because I hadn't a clue about my religion. I just think if you don't learn it when you are young you probably never will. However I would support them if when they are older they wish to be catholic instead of Babtist like me or some other denomination, unless it wasn't about the same god I believe in.



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