Leaving This Forum

27 Replies
Corona - October 25

Hi ladies, I hope all is well & that everyone's pregnancies & families are going well. I keep checking in with this board & I'm always disappointment to find that it has once again turned towards questions of non-prescription drug use & ttc. This was supposed to be a place where those with multiples & those expecting multiples could turn for support & advice. I no longer get that here. With my 3rd child arriving in Jan/08 & my twins now being only 16months old, I need advice & support again. It looks like I'll be forced to look for that elsewhere & that sadens me. There was a time when you ladies were so helpful, it's too bad that you have been thrown aside by selfish women. I wish you all the best & hope that those honestly looking for multiple info are actually able to find it.

 

twins4us - October 25

Aww Corona, I totally "get " why. I agree the clomid people have taken over, bumping up posts that are 1-2 yrs old. This board IS suppose to be for those pg with multiples, not those ttc or those taking clomid for the sole purpose of twins. UGH! We will be sorry to see you go. A side note...Miss Kim had her baby...surprise surprise it was ONE (lol) baby girl. She swore til the end it was twins though.

 

Baliezer - October 25

I am still expecting to see her on America's most wanted. LOL!

 

mrssolo - October 25

I really is depressing to always come here and see the clomid post. I just don't understand why they can'y go to the ttc board. It is very difficult being pregnant with twins and not having anyone else in your shoes to relate with. The only prgenant people I know are on this forum and it is very fustrating. I had trouble ttc myself and never thought about trying for twins or taking unprescribed meds. I just kept enjoying my time with my husband and it happened. It truely is a shame that this board is being lost to people who don't even have twins. I spend most of my time on the third trimester board because at least those women have children or are pregnant. I wish there was someway we could change this. But everytime anything is said we get beat up and called mean, hateful, ect. Sigh what a shame...... Best wishes to you Corona, good luck with your twins and your singleton baby.

 

samehere - October 25

I don't come here nearly as much as I used to because of all these posts that have nothing to do with twins. I'm sure they wouldn't want us to go to the ttc board and talk about our twin pregnancies and bury all their posts. Anyway, corona, try babycenter.com and twinstuff.com. They are very good boards, heavily monitored to keep all the trouble makers and multiples fakers out and the women are VERY supportive. None of the stuff that goes on here would be tolerated. In fact, YAY, or Yaz or Was (I can't remember) from here went to babycenter and caused so much trouble, her posts were erased and she found no one on there that would support u/p clomid just to conceive twins. She never came back so I guess she was banned. This pretty much happened within a couple of days. LOL Twins4us about that Kim girl. Man she made a big stink about how she knew her body and we knew zip. I guess it is the other way around, huh?

 

julie2007 - October 25

i think it is sad that someone can't come on here and ask questions about multiples - NO WHERE does it say you MUST BE PREGNANT WITH or HAVE HAD multiples to be on this board -- infact it is simply t_tled "TWINS AND MULTIPLE BIRTH" === meaning if you have any question about twins or multiples you should feel you can come on here and be able to ask your question and hopefully have someone answer it for you ---- not be told to go to another board. -- -- i also think it is sad that you CORONA don't feel you can still come on here and get support / info from your other pregnant twin moms -- can't you just over look the clomid posts? or is there some other underlying reason? i mean realistically --- i came on here a while ago - to ask a question about the risk of multiples (using injectible medications necessary for me to have a child) - and i was referred to the TTC board - when i already knew what i needed to to TTC - i needed to know some things from MULTIPLE MOMS!~ and i was rebuffed - and no one helped me - infact i felt i was looked down upon because of the medical intervention i needed to achieve pregnancy. . . . . . . . . . . . i wish i had found comfort or support or atleast someone to answer my questions i had here because as i posted i was SCARED to have twins because of the huge amount of work you all must put in (i already have a 2 y/O) -- and the incredible risk it is on the pregnancy and babies (i lost TWO BABIES THIS YEAR ALREADY!) --- and now that i found out today that i am pregnant with MULTIPLES - i feel this is not a place i can come to and feel welcomed or confortable --- now that i re-read that i would likely be more welcomed now that i am a mom who's pregnant again this time with more than one -- but sadly - i feel i have no support. ----- TWINS4US -- there are people bumping up old posts on other boards too - and YOU ARE MISTAKEN - (i quote you) - "this board is suppose (d) to be for those pg with multiples, not those ttc or those taking clomid for ....." again - this bpard is NOT SOLELY for those PREGNANT WITH TWINS or multiples - it is also intended for those who have questions or need support regarding twins or multiples. and SAMEHERE - if you wanted to go on the TTC board while TTC (twins or just one) and ask questions or find support - you'd be welcome with open arms - same thing with the miscarriage board. if you had a question relevant to miscarriage - ask - they'll support. i believe i have seen someone on here even be so rude to post SHOO - does anyone have any RAID? ----- when in all senses of reality - if you don't want to read aboaut clomid then skip the post. ----- hard as it may seem to believe there are some women (not me) who are inclined to put their own selfish needs infront of those or their furute or unborn children -- and if their life is dedicated to creating multiple babies - they will do whatever they can to get there -- no amount of rudeness or insensitivity - or law requiring a prescription for medication will stop them. so the lecturing of them is senseless -- but honestly IF YOU DON"T WANT TO READ THE POST - SKIP it. or better yet - DEVELOP YOUR OWN POST / THREAD AND KEEP IT ALIVE. - i am sure when i have my babies i will not have a moment to myself - no less time to sit on a pregnancy info board and complain about people who will never directly or indirectly effect my life ---- that said - sorry to see you go - but if that is what you feel is your best option - and you aren't making a decision based on emotion or irrational thought (read: just like all the unprescribed clomid takers decisions) --- then best of luck to you and yours. perhaps you will reconsider and decide to start your own thread about "PREGNANT WITH TWINS AND HAVE A TODDLER HELP" kind of thread and see what happens - - likely no unprescribed clomid takers will "pop" on there--- or go try the section called toddler care -- perhaps there is someone there that can help you. - if i could help you i'd try - but i doubt you'll let me. -------------- especially after this post. but please know that this is written with the best intentions - and as much as you are sick of seeing how the unprescribed clomid takers are on here - is as much as i feel about being turned away whwen i had LEGITIMATE concerns about having multiples. (SAMEHERE- thanks for the website suggestions - i will check there for support on my very very new multiple pregnancy - as i am now more scared to bits of what's to come & the possibility of losing my 3rd pregnancy this year- than ever before!) -- live and let live - peace.

 

Kimmer23 - October 26

I second what Julie stated. To describe my own situation, I am not pregnant, but would love to be (and honestly, preferably with one). Because I am taking PRESCRIBED clomid, I wanted to stop on this board to see if anyone wrote on the risk of multiples when on precribed clomid. Also, I have LOTS and LOTS of fraternal twins on my mother's side and my husband has some in his family. I originally came on this thread to ask about these risks. Then, I discovered the "Clomid Success stories" thread, and realized that I am in the same boat as a lot of the girls on there. Granted some are taking u/p clomid to acheive multiples. But, others, like me, are really just seeking someone to talk to about clomid use, TTC, and risk of multiples. Contrary to what you may believe, we are all not on this thread trying to become parents of multiples by taking u/p clomid. And, as much as agree that the clomid threads are probably a better fit under TTC or "problems geting pregnant", I don't really understand why it has become a "crime" to a__sociate on this thread. TTC is hard, having twins or multiples I'm SURE is hard. We all want support, and I hope we can ALL find it. I just don't think it is that big of a deal where that support is found - as long as you find it. I hope you all stay a part of this thread and support each other. But, please let others who have questions about multiples and even clomid (considering it raises your rick substantially) to feel free to convene here too. There is room for everyone. Thanks. :)

 

Kimmer23 - October 26

oh yeah - I meant to say this. I don't think you girls are mean, rude, or anything else. I can understand your frustration. I just wanted to give you the other side of the story, so maybe you can understand why at least some of us are on your forum.

 

twins4us - October 26

Kimmer I don't think anyone begrudges questions being asked, but when 99% of the posts are about clomid the moms who ARE pg with multiples questions are getting lost in the shuffle and that is frustrating.Julie YOU are interpreting that this board is for those who have questions about conceiving multiples. I interpret it for those ALREADY pg with them. The ladies here can answer questions, but again that is antedotal evidence....it really doens't mean anything as each person is an individual. SO many gals come her asking if it is twins due to this or that . WE don't know....all we know is an sono is the only way. Symptoms mean nothing. Hcg mean nothing. The fact that someone got twins on 100 mg of clomid does NOT mean you will. ASK YOUR DOCTOR!!! As far as bumping up posts that are 1-2 yrs old....so WHAT if it is done on other boards, that was not my point. My point is that it has become excessive, and impossible to simply "skip their post". I would have to go to the next page to do that. There are moms who need questions answered who are already pg with twins who are terribly frustrated. Asking the ttc board while ttc is reasonable. Asking questions about your m/c when you had one on that board is reasonable. Asking the m/c board about a impending baby shower is not reasonable. Most people ttc ARE NOT having multiples. Statistically the rate of twinning is 1 in 89. Isn't there a clomid board here? Many other forums have a board designated just for that.

 

julie2007 - October 26

thanks kimmer --------- good luck with your TTC endeavors - i hope clomid gets you one healthy beautiful baby. ----twins4us ---- perhaps some moms on here could suggest a CLOMID board to the moderators ?? and then let your board remain for NON-clomid questions?? but as for interpretation of the board (mine being it is for those who have questions about twins / multiples AS WELL as those who already are pregnant with them or have them - your intrepretation would only be for pregnant twin moms? what about those who already had them? - ) people learn from one another - draw support from one another - and they can get that here. ( i was only addressing the posts from 1 -2 years ago because you posted about it on here - believe me there are a TON of posts on the other threads from long ago - about things that we'd deem unnecessary to repeat (i.e - can i be pregnant already i got my AF ended 2 days ago and my bbs are sore) ---- - but just think that they are likely from people who are new (and don't realize the "ways" here yet - and that is why they dig for info on the posts - i know not all people are pure and innocent in their quest for info - but some are genuine and true - and for those people i think we can try to help -- for the gal on her 14th month of unprescribed clomid looking for advice on how to get her meds from india / mexico into a country that forbids it - so she can haev her 1st set of anything at age 19 - i'd say skip the post. do you see what i am saying? i am not intending to be out of line - i just wnt you all to realize that some of us out here really have legitimate questions of concerns about twins / multiples and have no where else to ask. peace --to all. (btw there have been severla posts on the miscarriage board about baby showers!!)

 

Kimmer23 - October 26

Thanks julie for your support - I hope I have 1 happy, healthy baby too! And, congrats to you - you are having multiples! Like you said, a lot of work, but a blessing too. As for this post, I won't say anymore after this. But, I do think that a forum ent_tled "twins and multiple births" should be open to those pg with multiples, those who had them, and also those thinking about the risks if on clomid or if they run in your family (or just b/c). As julie stated, we can all learn from each other. And, it might just be those people taking u/p clomid to get mulitples at 19 that NEED that suport and guidance even more. I'm not saying that should take priority by any means, but what's the harm in telling them flat out how hard it has been for you having multiples. Or, like Julie also said, just skip the thread. I checked out the 1st page of this forum, and the vast majority of the posts have to do with twins and/or multiples. There are definitely some clomid posts and other posts where ??s where posed about risks, etc. , but really what's the harm, you have to scroll down the page? I believe the amount of people that can be helped through supportive threads way outweighs the inconvenience of scrolling down the page. And, if you just keep a thread going stong - you won't even have to do that. thanks! :)

 

twins4us - October 26

KImmer check the dates of the posts. I bumped up several so that the clomid ones were done towards the bottom on Wed. Before that date 99% of the posts on the first page WERE clomid ones.

 

mrssolo - October 26

See here is the problem. This post was not meant to be a clomid vs. twin mom battle. Corona who has twins and has been on this board for quite some time is getting fustrated like we all do. No one is aying if you think your having twins don't ask. Or if you have twins in your family history don't ask. Or if you conceived twins in anyway to stay away. Quite frankley I don't care how you conceived your twins or multiples whether it be natural under the care of a doctor or by a voodoo chant. If You are expecting twins come on here. But if your simply trying to conceive why here? It would be nice to simply ingone all the clomid post but they take over the board in a few hours, twins are rare and there are not that many twin moms here to out post the ttc ppl. It would be one thing if there was one thread about clomid Success stories but every post is about clomid or u/p clomid or puposely ttc twins or more. twins4us did bump up the older twin post just recently and already they are being pushed down by clomid post. This thread is for ppl who have twins and who are pregnant with twins and we can't just have our board for info. If I was on the loss board and someone came on asking about a baby shower I would be offened and the same goes here. Once you conceive more than one welcome until then stay on the ttc board. It is really that simple. What advice can you give me on being 32 weeks pregnant with twins and uncomfortable and what to expect? If you haven't walk a mile in my shoes you don't know how to advise me. I'm also on the third trimester board and while they are all in the same stage of pregnancy that I am they also don't have any advise for me on twin pregnancy. That is what this board is for. I too had trouble ttc but I did conceive naturally and I understand how hard it can be, but I never came on here bothering the women who had twins asking what cycle day the were on or anything else. So I ask once again What advice can you give me on being 32 weeks pregnant with twins and uncomfortable and what to expect?

 

Kimmer23 - October 26

I promised not to say anything else, but I have one FINAL comment. mrssolo stated: "No one is aying if you think your having twins don't ask. Or if you have twins in your family history don't ask. Or if you conceived twins in anyway to stay away. Quite frankley I don't care how you conceived your twins or multiples whether it be natural under the care of a doctor or by a voodoo chant. If You are expecting twins come on here. But if your simply trying to conceive why here?" To that, I ask, what if you are TTC and on clomid, which ups your chances for multiples and youi are wondering about the risks? Doesn't that fit under your ??s allowed....that's why a lot of people find this board. And, then they stay - maybe they shouldn't, but they do. B/c they find a board with supportive, generally friendly people. And, also, you are totally correct, that I cannot advise you on being 32 weeks pg. But, you could help advise someone who is TTC and wondering how it is...maybe they won't take clomid if they knew the risks or how it could be (not saying all clomid pregnancies are mult., but there is an increased chance). Maybe they will try naturally longer. And, someone that has already delivered can advise you on how you are feeling. And, someone raising twins can advise someone that just delivered tiwns...it goes on and on...everyone can help others on this board, if you choose to. Every person on a board can't necessarliy help every other person. But, people can learn from each other. Even me TTC can give some insight to others...maybe not how to feel or what to expect. People TTC have generally seen lots of docs, heard lots of stats, and do know a lot (maybe not from personal experience). But, still, they are informed. I wish with all my heart I can eventually have children - 1, 2,3, I don't care. I just want healthy pregnancy(ies). Please try to be sensitive to those TTC and having a hard time. We have a right to talk, vent, cry, and be frustrated too. And, if people find that here (espcially new people that don't know better which board to post on), I don't care...I just want them to find it.

 

Kimmer23 - October 26

That being said, I'm leaving this forum too and will never come back. You chased one of us away...way to go.

 

julie2007 - October 26

kimmer sorry to see you go ---- mrs solo - sometimes att_tude is everything.

 

julie2007 - October 26

mrs solo - you say (quote) "If you haven't walk a mile in my shoes you don't know how to advise me. " ------- then ask (again quote) " So I ask once again What advice can you give me on being 32 weeks pregnant with twins and uncomfortable and what to expect? " ----- my advice to you (although i never walked in anyones shoes but my own --- ) would be to enjoy your pregnancy uncomfortable and all - especially if you had trouble conceiving as you state. enjoy every minute of every pain, cramp, twinge, and ache because some women never get that chance. and again - my advice is - ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING -- perhaps if you weren't so easliy offeneded by things you could enjoy more. i almost feel sorry for you (not in a bad way so don't take it that way) - but anyone who has had trouble TTC - knows how "short" a pregnancy can be - and i could say ---- if you think yoy're uncomfortable now - wait till you have your C section and try to care for twins + and climb stairs holding two carseats etc - then you will know uncomfortable. ----- but again - att_tude (and a good att_tude is what i try to possess) will have me say this --- but for you i hope the joy of holding your miracles in your hands outweighs any discomfort you may have. the joy of knowing you have two little souls to call you mom and love you forever takes away any aggrevation and anguish this board brings you. --------- peace - to all -------

 

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